‘I’ve always been overprotective, so don’t brandish that card, lady!’
He’s right, he has, but I’m pissed and I’ll use anything against him, which reminds me that we’ve steered off course a bit. ‘She goes, or I do!’
He actually rolls his eyes. I don’t appreciate it. I buck myself, and he releases me, but it’s because he doesn’t want me to hurt his babies. It makes me madder. ‘Ava, I was in a mess, you refuse to work for me, and I need someone who knows what they’re doing.’
I stop and swing round. ‘So she’s working for you again?’ I don’t believe this. Her compassionate little speech at the coffee house stood for shit. She’s probably delighting in this. He gets up and walks towards me. ‘Stop where you are, Ward!’ I point my finger in his face. ‘Don’t try to placate me or convince me that this is all fine because it f**king isn’t!’
‘Watch you f**king mouth!’
‘No! She’s in love with you. Do you know that? Everything she has done really is because she wants to take you away from me, so don’t even think about trying to convince me that this is a good idea.’
‘I know,’
I snap my mouth shut and retreat back a little. ‘What do you mean, you know?’
‘I know she’s in love with me.’
‘You do?’
‘Of course I do, Ava. I’m not f**king stupid.’
I scoff. ‘You obviously are! You’ll trample anyone who tries to take me away from you, yet right under your nose, she’s doing the best job and you’re choosing to ignore it!’ I swing around and stamp my way into the kitchen. I need some water to sooth my scratchy throat.
‘I didn’t just let it go unsaid, Ava. I had it out with her and she admitted and regretted it all.’
‘Of course she regrets it. She failed! She’s probably regretting not doing a better job.’ I slam my glass down on the worktop. ‘And you may as well have let it go unsaid. Did you offer burial or cremation?’
His face screws up. ‘What?’
‘The usual option you give people who hurt me. Did you offer it to Sarah?’
‘No, I offered her a job in return for her word that she’ll never interfere again. I told her that if you say so, she’s out.’
‘I say so!’ I shout. ‘I say she’s out!’
‘But she hasn’t done anything.’
I look at the thick skinned idiot across the worktop in disbelieve. ‘She’s not done anything?’
His eyes close and he exhales long and wearily. ‘I mean she’s not done anything since I reinstated her. And you rewarded her with a tidy crack to the jaw for the stuff that came before.’
‘Why are you doing this? You know how I feel, Jesse.’
‘Because she’s desperate, Ava. She has no life past The Manor.’
‘You feel sorry for her?’ I ask more calmly. I love everything about this man, except his sudden empathy for all of these historical women who are trying to sabotage our relationship. Look what he did to Matt, for Christ’s sake.
‘Ava, first of all, I want you to calm down because it’s not good for you or the babies.’
‘I am calm!’ I screech, lifting my glass with wobbly hands. I’m far from calm.
He sighs and cocks his head to crack his neck, almost like he’s alleviating some stress. I have no idea what he’s so stressed about. Let me tell him that I’ll continue to work for Mikael and see what reaction that sparks. It’s the same principle, kind of.
He walks over to me, takes the glass from my hand and picks me up, placing me on the worktop. My jaw is seized and pulled up to meet his face. I maintain my scowl, looking at him through pissed off eyes.
‘Sarah has nothing. I kicked her out when she came clean, and thought no more of it.’ He takes a deep breath. ‘Until John spoke with her and she was saying all kinds of f**ked up shit, the most worrying part mentioning death being better than living her life without me.’
My suspicious mind instantly makes me think that it’s another ploy to nab him. I can’t help it. ‘Attention seeker.’ I snipe, still scowling. Her past actions are a clear indication to what lengths she’ll go to.
‘I thought so, too, but John wasn’t so sure. He found her. She’d slashed her wrists and taken a pile of pain killers.’ He raises his eyebrows as I recoil. ‘It was no cry for help, Ava. There was no attention seeking about it. John only just got her to the hospital in time. She wanted to die.’
My brain is failing me on all counts. There are plenty of sensible questions that I should be asking, but nothing is coming to me. I’m blank.
‘I don’t want another death on my conscience, baby. I live with Jake’s every single day. I can’t do it.’
I choke on sympathy. ‘She came to see me.’ I say. I don’t know where it comes from.