My whole body is shaking.
Everyone has just been witness to the fact that I’ve been sleeping with Jake behind Will’s back. Even though they probably already knew, I still have never felt trashier than I do in this moment.
I should go after Will, I know, but what can I say that will make this better?
I knew what I was doing by telling him. Yes, it was the right thing to do. But I was also making my decision. I was choosing Jake.
He may not want me now after all this. And I don’t know how I feel about him sleeping with Zzhuilette.
But I love him. I’ll always love him. It’s always been him.
The door opposite me opens and Tom stumbles out, looking half-asleep.
“What the fuck’s going on out here?” he yawns, stretching his arms over his head, as he glances around taking in the scene.
Me in my pyjamas in Simone’s arms crying. Jake bleeding from the mouth. Denny in his boxer shorts.
“Oh, right,” he says putting two and two together, dropping his arms down. “Guess, I’ll leave you guys to it then.” Stepping back he closes his door.
Jake hasn’t taken his eyes off me, but I can’t bring myself to meet his stare.
“Come on,” Simone says to me. “You can’t stay out here.” Because Will could come back out soon, she leaves off.
Moving me forward, my legs feel like lead as she steers me into Jake’s suite. He steps back, making room for me to pass.
Denny closes the door behind us all, as Simone sits me down on the sofa, sitting beside me.
It’s utter silence in the room. The most uncomfortable silence I’ve ever been in.
“Come on, man, let’s clean you up.” Denny jerks his head in the direction of the bathroom at Jake, breaking the unnerving silence.
Jake looks at me. He seems hesitant to go, but after a long, lingering moment, he wordlessly follows Denny through the bedroom to the bathroom.
“I’ll get you some water.” Simone gets up and quickly returns with a bottle of water and a wad of tissues, handing me them both.
I wipe my face dry with the tissues, putting the bottle beside me on the sofa.
“How did he find out?” she asks in a quiet voice.
“I told him.” I glance at her, a fresh tear leaking from my eye. I wipe it away. “He knew something wasn’t right from my behaviour last night, and I couldn’t keep lying to him.”
“You did the right thing.”
“Yes, but I did the wrong thing in the beginning. I’ve fucked everything up, Simone.” Leaning forward, I put my head in my hands, as tears form in my eyes again.
Simone rubs my back. “You made a few errors in judgement granted, but you’re only human, Tru. And you’re clearly in love with Jake.”
I turn my head glancing at her. “I know, but I still shouldn’t have done what I did.”
“No, you shouldn’t have, but there’s no changing it now I’m afraid.” She tucks my hair behind my ear. “So now you have to figure out what you’re going to do from here.” She nods her head in the direction of the bathroom.
She means what am I going to do about Jake.
“I don’t know.”
“Well I’m taking it you and Will have broken up.”
“But that doesn’t mean I should jump straight into something with Jake, and … well, Jake spent the night with another woman.” My lips turn down at the corners.
I was half-expecting Zzhuilette to be here in his room to be honest as it’s still so early.
She shakes her head. “No he didn’t.”
I look at her surprised. “He did. Stuart told me Dave had brought him and her back here.”
“I was leaving the party with Denny last night, not long after you left, and Tom said he was coming back with us, that he’d just got off the phone with Jake – said Jake had called him and he was wrecked and was in a real mess over you. He said he’d never known Jake to be like that over a girl, and it was freaking him the fuck out. I said I thought he’d left with that girl too, but Tom said there was definitely no girl with him because no girl would have put up with his whining over you.”
“And from what I know, Tom spent most of the night in Jake’s room talking him down. I know for definite there was no girl in here because Denny was so worried about him that he left me to go check on him too. When he came back, he said that maybe I should talk to you, because Jake was really screwed up over the whole Will being here thing.”
“I’ve messed up so badly,” I whisper, the tears starting again.
I’m relieved that Jake hadn’t slept with her, but I’m all cut up over Will and how much I’ve hurt him. I just don’t know what to do.
The bathroom door in the bedroom opens, and Jake comes out with Denny behind him.
My whole body tenses.
The blood’s gone from his lip, but it’s all swollen and readying for a bruise.
He comes over and sits on the edge of the sofa, opposite me, resting his elbows on his knees, clasping his hands together, he looks over at me with wary eyes.