So This Is Love

chapter Five

She tasted like coffee and chocolate—warm, sexy, irresistible, and he couldn't get enough of her. He threaded one hand through her hair, holding her head so he could explore her mouth, slip his tongue through those soft lips, and completely lose himself in her. Everything faded away, all the worries, all the problems. It was just Emma—her scent, her touch, the give and take of her mouth.

One kiss turned into two, then three. He should stop, but he couldn't. Every breath made him want another taste, a deeper connection. He nibbled on her bottom lip and then slipped his tongue inside her mouth. Her breath quickened, but she didn't pull away. Instead her arms crept around him, and her breasts grazed his chest.

The tantalizing touch made him want so much more.

He pressed her back against the sand, loving the feel of her body beneath him. He wanted her clothes off. He wanted her skin bare. He wanted to bury himself inside of her.

But Emma's arms were no longer holding him close. She was pushing him away.

He rolled over on to his side as she sat up and stared at him, her eyes blazing with desire, her hair tangled from his fingers, her lips red and full.

She stared at him for a long moment.

He didn't know what to say, and for once she seemed to have no words.

Slowly, reality seeped into his brain. They were on a public beach. There were kids throwing a ball to a dog not thirty feet away, and he'd been making out like a teenager.

"What was that?" she said finally.

"That was—what I've been thinking about the past three months," he admitted.

"Really?" she asked, a note of wonder in her voice. "I thought you didn't like me."

"I didn't like what you made me feel. There's been attraction between us from the start. You know that." He paused. "And you feel the same way, don't you? Because I'm pretty sure you kissed me back, Emma."

"You took me by surprise."

"Did I? I distinctly remember telling you to go. You didn't move."

"I don’t like to be told what to do."

"Yeah, I know. I should have said stay and then you would have left," he said dryly.

She frowned. "Max, that can't happen again."

"I know," he agreed. There were a lot of reasons why he shouldn't kiss her again, and they weren't all because of their professional relationship.

Emma tucked her hair behind her ears as the wind blew the silky strands across her face. "We should go back to work."

Despite her words, she made no effort to get up.

He rolled on to his back and stared up at the sky.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked a moment later.

"Nothing and everything."

"That covers a lot of territory."

"I feel…" He searched for the right words. "Like I'm at a crossroads. And I don't know which path to take."

"What are the choices?"

"One involves trying to salvage the relationship with my brother and my mom. The other takes me back to a world where I don't have to worry about anyone but myself."

"You didn't worry about your family when you were in Los Angeles?" she questioned.

"It was easier not to think about them when I was farther away."

"Can you tell me what happened with your brother, Max?"

"You can go online and learn everything you want to know."

"Why don't you save me the trouble and just tell me?"

"I already told you the short version. The long one will have to wait."

He sat up and brushed the sand off his sleeves and pants. Then he got to his feet, and held his hand out to her. After a moment, she took it.

He pulled her to her feet and held on to her hand longer than he should have. The heat between them still smoldered. Looking into her eyes, he saw the same awareness, and the same worry.

She pulled free and then dug her hands into her pockets as she started walking away. They didn't say anything on the way back to the car, or even on the drive back to Brady's. The destruction of the bar reminded him that the brief respite from work was over. He had a murderer to find, and she had an arson case to solve.

"We'll talk soon, right?" Emma asked, as she pulled up behind his car.

"Sure."

"I don't want what happened to jeopardize this case."

"It won't."

"Good. I'm going to chalk that kiss up to temporary insanity."

He smiled. "Insanity? That sounds about right." He opened the door and then paused, glancing back at her. "I won't kiss you again, unless you ask me."

"That's not going to happen."

* * *

Emma's protest was cut-off by the slamming of the door. Max had shown her a different side earlier in the day, but that last comment reminded her how arrogant he could be. She was not going to kiss him again—for many reasons. She'd worked too hard to get taken seriously at her job to jeopardize her reputation by having a fling with the cop on her case. Max might be able to get away with it. The guys in his department would probably all give him a high-five if they found out. But the fire guys would lose respect for her. It was a double standard, but one she had to deal with.

She just wished Max hadn't been such a good kisser. She put her fingers to her mouth, her lips still tingling from the intensity and force of his kiss. That hadn't been some brief, tender caress but an all-out assault on her senses. She didn't think she'd ever been kissed quite like that, with so much intensity and need, as if she alone could drive away whatever demons were plaguing him. Which reminded her that that kiss had not been solely driven by desire but also by emotions inside of Max, emotions that she didn't completely understand. It was obvious he was in some sort of turmoil. She'd never seen him so rattled. In the three months that she'd known him, he'd always been in control. But he'd been out of control on that beach, and she'd liked him even more.

Blowing out a breath, she pulled back into traffic and headed home. It was after five and dusk was settling over the city. Despite the coffee and chocolate, she was feeling the effects of having been up most of the night. She needed to give her mind a rest.

Ten minutes later, she pulled into the driveway of her parents' house. To her surprise and delight, she saw Sara Davidson leaving the house next door.

Sara had been her best friend in middle school and high school. They'd spent a zillion hours together, but after Sara's mother died, and Sara went off to college, they'd lost contact. That had changed two weeks ago when Sara had come home for her father's birthday. Her surprise visit had triggered a series of events, including a house fire at her father's house, and a reunion with Aiden, Emma's older brother.

As a teenager, Sara had had a crazy crush on Aiden. Back then the three year age difference between them had been too great. Not to mention the fact that Aiden was a reckless, rebellious bad boy, and Sara was a really smart good girl. But somehow the two of them had found their way to each other after ten years apart, and Emma couldn't be happier.

She threw the car into park and got out. Sara came across the grass with a smile on her face. She looked relaxed and happy, her big brown eyes filled with joy, her long brown hair falling in soft waves around her shoulders. She wore cute black boots over skinny jeans and a soft pink sweater.

"I didn't think you'd be back so soon. It hasn't even been a week," Emma said. "What happened with your job?"

"I gave them two weeks notice, and they told me to leave that day. It's basically what happens to anyone when they quit," Sara replied. "Aiden helped me pack up my apartment, and here we are."

"Big change," she said, a little surprised that Sara had thrown away her high paying attorney position in New York so quickly.

"I know," Sara said, a guilty smile on her face. "My boss thought I was crazy to leave when I was on the fast track to partner. But in truth I'd been thinking about leaving that job for the last few years. Being back in San Francisco reminded me of how much I missed the city. It was time to come home."

"You're leaving out Aiden," Emma reminded her.

Sara's cheeks turned pink, and her eyes sparkled. "He's been amazing, Em. I never thought I could be this happy. Aiden was the star of all my teenage fantasies, but I never imagined those dreams could come true."

"You weren't ready for each other before; you are now."

"I really love him, Emma."

Emma felt moisture gather in her eyes at Sara's words. "I'm glad. I always wanted you to be my sister, and now you will be."

"Well, he hasn't proposed yet."

"He will," Emma said confidently. "Are you going to live at your dad's house, or will you and Aiden get a place together?"

"We're headed in that direction, but we have some decisions to make about work first, so we're taking our time. I need to spend this week getting my dad's house ready for his return."

"How's his leg?"

"Healing. It was broken in two places, and there was also damage to the cartilage, but he's doing better than expected at the rehab facility. I know he's anxious to get home. Your Uncle Kevin has already started the kitchen remodel, so I'm hoping the house will be ready when he comes home next week." Sara paused. "What's new around here?"

"Well, Brady's Bar burned to the ground last night, and it was not an accident."

Sara's gaze filled with dismay. "That's terrible."

"It gets worse. Sister Margaret's body was found in the ashes."

Sara's jaw dropped. "Sister Margaret is dead? Are you serious?"

"Yes, so now we have arson and homicide. It looks like the fire at St. Andrew's might also be connected to this one."

"And you're right in the middle of it."

"Along with Max Harrison," she said, a small sigh escaping her lips.

A gleam came into Sara's eyes. "Wait, isn't that the hot cop you were trying to avoid last week?"

"I can't believe you remember that," she grumbled.

"I have an excellent memory."

"Too good." Emma was happy to see Aiden coming down the driveway. She didn't want to talk about Max yet. She was still unsettled by how quickly they'd gotten carried away on the beach.

Aiden wore jeans and a t-shirt, his usual choice of dress, and his thick brown hair looked like it hadn't seen a comb all day. The second oldest Callaway, Aiden had always had a reckless streak. She wondered if Sara would be able to tame him. Probably not. It looked like Aiden was having more of an impact on Sara than the other way around. But she suspected that in the long run, they'd be really good together.

"Hey, Em," he said, giving her a quick hug.

Then Aiden put his arm around Sara and kissed her on the lips.

"Well, aren't you two sickeningly sweet," Emma said.

Aiden grinned, and the happy twinkle in his eyes matched Sara's. "Get used to it."

"Will I have to get used to it? Does this mean you're going to stay in San Francisco? No more smokejumping, Aiden?"

Her brother had spent the last several years working as a smokejumper in Redding, about four hours north of San Francisco. The tragic loss of his best friend had made Aiden question whether or not he wanted to go back when the season started again in the spring.

"For the next week I'm going to help Uncle Kevin at Sara's house. After that—I'm not sure," Aiden said. "I'm weighing my options."

Sara looked at Aiden. "I need to run to the store and get some food in the house. Your uncle hooked up a new refrigerator, so at least I can stock a few essentials. Do you want me to get you anything?"

"No, I'm good."

Sara smiled at Emma. "We'll catch up at dinner. Your mother already insisted we come over. I hope you'll be there."

"I will."

As Sara walked to her car, Aiden's gaze followed her. Emma punched her brother lightly in the arm. "You have it bad," she said. "Goofy grin and all."

Aiden gave an unrepentant shrug. "Sara is great, what can I say?"

"Nothing. She is great. It took you long enough to see that. I knew it a long time ago," she pointed out.

"Well, I had to wait for her to grow up."

She laughed. "Maybe Sara had to wait for you to grow up."

He grinned. "Possibly."

"How was New York?"

"Crowded, energized. I wouldn't want to live there full-time. Fortunately, Sara wanted to come back here."

"Would you have considered moving to New York if she hadn't wanted to leave?"

"Absolutely."

"Really, Aiden?" she asked doubtfully. "You love nature. You're more comfortable in the woods than anywhere else."

"I want to be where Sara is," he said simply.

She was impressed and amazed that her usually obstinate brother had fallen so hard for Sara that he was willing to change his entire life around. It reminded her of how little Jon had been willing to change for her. And she supposed, the opposite had been true as well, which was exactly why they hadn't been right for each other.

"I heard about Brady's," Aiden said, changing the subject. "How's the investigation going?"

"Slowly. I need to talk to Harry, but every time I call, Christian tells me his father is asleep."

"You have a suspicious note in your voice," Aiden said, giving her a questioning look. "Why?"

"I don't like being given the run around, especially from people who have known me most of my life. Not that Christian has ever been particularly friendly towards me."

"That's just Christian. He has always been in a bad mood."

"But he likes me even less since I became a firefighter. He told me once that chicks belong in the henhouse, not the firehouse," she added, quoting Christian's exact words.

"Did you punch him?" Aiden asked.

"I was tempted, but he was so drunk at the time, he fell over all by himself."

"Christian can be an a*shole, but he's got a good heart. He's very protective of his brother and his friends. And he's always been devoted to his father and to the bar. I think he owns part of it. I know he bartends there between his shifts. He must want to find the person who burned it down and killed Sister Margaret."

"I'd think so, too. I'm going to go over there in the morning."

Aiden shook his head. "I can't believe that cranky old nun is dead."

Her gaze narrowed at his words. His attitude was very similar to Drew's. "I thought Sister Margaret was sweet and kind."

"The only thing sweet about her were those gelatos she used to eat every day in detention."

His words rang a distant bell. Sister Margaret had loved walking around the corner to the Sugar Shack to get a gelato and sometimes bags of black licorice. Had she gone to get gelato the day she disappeared? Even if she had, what would that mean? She doubted there were security cameras at the Sugar Shack. Still, it might help Max pin down the timeline on the day of her disappearance.

"Emma?" Aiden asked. "Where did you go?"

"Just thinking. Drew told me that Sister Margaret didn't like the boys."

"You got that right. She was mean as hell to us."

"Obviously, Sister Margaret had two sides. I need to understand both of them."

"I thought you were working on the arson case."

"They're tied together."

"I don't like the idea of you getting involved in a murder," he said with a frown.

"I can handle it. Don't go all big-brother on me."

"I can't help it. You'll always be my little sister."

She smiled. "I get it, but I'm a big girl now." She decided to change the subject. "Are you really going to give up smokejumping, Aiden?"

"I'm not sure. I know what it's like for the wives of the smokejumpers, and I don't know that I want to put Sara through that."

"Are you already thinking marriage? That's big news."

"Not that big. There's no ring yet. So don't get too excited."

"When you do pick out a ring, you should take me with you. I know Sara's taste."

"I'll think about it."

"So much thinking," she teased. "You usually jump, then consider the consequences."

He grinned. "You know me too well."

"I'm glad you're taking it slow. I thought I was in love with Jon, but I was wrong. I'm just glad he never asked me to marry him. I might have said yes. I might have had kids with him, and then we'd be in the middle of a horrible divorce right now. The last thing I ever want to do is put my children through a divorce. Even though I was really young when it happened to my mom and dad, I've never forgotten that horrible feeling when I saw my dad move out."

"I didn't realize you remembered that," Aiden said.

"Some things never leave your memory. Do you remember when your mom died?"

He nodded. "Worst day of my life. But I got a second mom who is wonderful."

"And I got a second dad, who is also great," she said, meeting his gaze. "I wasn't so sure about all the brothers that came with him, but you grew on me."

He smiled. "And you and Nicole grew on us. I can't imagine our family without everyone in it."

"Neither can I."

"I have to run an errand. I'll see you at dinner, Em."

"Okay." As she headed inside the house, she thought how lucky she was to be a Callaway. No matter what happened in her life, she could always count on her family to be there for her, the whole crazy bunch of them.