“Who are you looking for? We’ve seen a few fellas wander down here,” said one of the girls from inside the drained pool. “Can you describe him for us?”
The soldier knelt down at the edge of the pool. “Tall guy, long brown hair, civilian clothes. Bloodstained shirt. Name is Florian Beck. He’s probably trying to stay out of sight. Gauleiter Koch has a message for him.”
They would quickly realize their error in their laughter toward me. I was, after all, soon to receive a medal. I cleared my throat. “Excuse me, sir, but I may be able to deliver that message to your desired party.”
The soldier threw a glance at me over his shoulder. “I wasn’t talking to you. Get lost.” The girls giggled.
They were dismissing me. Laughing at me. The familiar anger began to rise.
I did not serve this soldier.
I did not serve my father.
I served only one.
The one.
“Heil Hitler!” I yelled, slicing my right arm through the air in salute. I turned on my heel and walked out.
joana
I placed the baby in Emilia’s arms and leaned down to whisper, “I told Dr. Richter I found a Latvian to translate. I think he believed me.” Emilia didn’t look convinced. I righted my posture and my voice. “Have you thought of a name yet?”
She nodded, smiling. “Halinka.”
“Halinka. That’s a beautiful name,” I said.
“My mother’s name was Halina. My father always called her Halinka.”
I thought of my own father. How long would the Soviets occupy our country? Eva had said the occupation could last as long as ten years. That couldn’t be true.
I heard the stiff step of boots. The blond Nazi entered the room.
“Good morning, Litwinka. Ready to sail?”
“Can’t be soon enough,” I replied. “What do you need?”
“Are you always so serious?” he asked, sauntering toward me. “I was just down on E deck. The girls in the pool are much friendlier.”
“Perhaps they’re not as busy as I am.”
“I’m busy too,” he said. He removed his brimmed hat and placed it under his arm. “I’m still looking for your patient, Florian Beck. The office received a return wire from Gauleiter Koch.” He stared at me.
He was alone. Relaxed. If Florian was to be arrested, there would be rushing, searching, more soldiers. “What’s the message?” I asked.
“Ah, you’re interested?” he said.
My curiosity burned. I reluctantly gave him my best smile, trying to coax details from him. “A nurse is always interested in her patients.”
“Can I be a patient?” he asked. His smugness was annoying. This was the type of man who looked at a picture on the wall and instead of admiring the photo, looked at his own reflection in the glass.
I forced myself to flirt with him and stepped in close. “Let’s see how well you communicate with the nursing staff. Read me the message.”
He removed a piece of paper from his pocket and read: “Have Beck contact me directly. Tell DRL dead. Keys needed. Urgent.”
I repeated the message in my mind, memorizing it. I stepped away from him and back toward Emilia. Gauleiter Koch had sent a direct message. Florian wasn’t lying.
“Well?” said the soldier.
“Sounds like you’d better deliver that message to Herr Beck.”
“Yes, but he seems to have disappeared,” he said.
“I told you, he wanted to board the Hansa.”
“Hansa is pulling out now.”
“Well, then I guess you’ve missed your chance, haven’t you?”
florian
The Prussian. That’s what Joana called me.
I thought of the Prussian flag, a black eagle on a white background. What would happen to the kingdom of Prussia and its forty million inhabitants? Its legacy reached back to the thirteenth century, but now lay crushed underfoot. Can history disappear if it’s written in blood?
A noise roared. I nearly fell off the ledge in the chimney. My heart hammered.
Was it an alarm? An air raid?
And then I realized. It was the air horn.
The ship was finally departing.
I peeked through the seam in the steel and immediately wished I hadn’t. The scene below was horrifying. I had never seen such desperation. Those left behind on the dock were frantic to come on board. Faces contorted as they screamed and begged.
Mothers tried hurling their infants to passengers up on deck, but they couldn’t throw high enough. Their babies smashed against the side of the ship and plunged into the sea. Women screamed and dove into the water after the children. A man dressed as a woman was beaten by a sentry when he tried to rush the gangway. I watched it all from above, sick with sympathy as they cried and screamed that they would die if they were not allowed to board. The Gustloff was their only hope.
I clutched my pack, shaking my head in disbelief.
The Gustloff was my only hope, as well.
And I had made it.
alfred