chapter 15
“I don’t understand why you are in such a foul mood.”
Nicholas didn’t reply to Miss Delafield’s annoyed comment. He was busy gnawing on a piece of rabbit, and he wasn’t about to apologize for his swearing, his table manners, or his temper.
They had settled beneath a stand of trees a few yards from the small waterfall. The moon and the firelight shone on the remains of their supper, scattered around them on the riverbank. They had roasted two rabbits and a fish, fried a half-dozen eggs—gathered from a nest near the water’s edge—in the biscuit tin, and made short work of a score of wild strawberries found growing beneath the evergreens.
But even a hot meal in his belly hadn’t improved his humor in the least.
One week. He had lost an entire week. Which left him only five days to get to York before Michaelmas. Impossible. Food and rest were helping to restore his strength, but he would never make it in time. Not on foot. He needed a horse.
And how the devil was he supposed to obtain a horse in the middle of Cannock Chase?
“I honestly don’t see what difference a few extra days makes.” Miss Delafield lay on her back, her head pillowed on the fishing creel, as she contentedly munched a strawberry. “Surely whoever you’re meeting in York will understand the delay.”
“Not bloody likely,” Nicholas muttered, sitting near her feet, his back against a pine tree. He finished eating and flicked a bone toward the stream.
“Well, we’re alive. That’s something to be grateful for.”
He slanted her a glare. Her cheery attitude had grated on his nerves all night, ever since they had left the cave. “Why?” he snapped. “What’s there to feel grateful for? That the inevitable has been postponed? It may have slipped your mind, your ladyship, but we’re still facing a few problems. Like these for one.” He shook his right leg, jangling the shackles. “Not to mention a few dozen lawmen out there somewhere”—he jerked a thumb toward the far end of the glade, where it opened into the forest—“who want to put a bullet or two or ten into us. It’s a little early to be holding a victory parade.”
She sat up, her expression as calm as her voice. “I think the fact that we were in the cave for seven days instead of three or four is a good thing. It works in our favor. The lawmen obviously gave up searching this part of the forest a long time ago. Maybe they’re looking for us in the towns by now. Or they think we’re dead. Or—”
“Or maybe they’re still out there somewhere. Waiting for us to fall into their snare just like Mr. Bunny here fell into ours.” He nodded toward the blackened carcass impaled on a spit over their fire.
She glanced at the rabbit, then back at him. “You’re right. We have plenty to worry about. And as soon as you’re strong enough to move on, we’ll worry about it.” Lying down again, she sighed wearily. “But do I have to think of all that right this minute?”
Nicholas muttered an oath. He couldn’t stop thinking about it. He had wanted to press on the instant he realized how much time they’d lost. But he wasn’t strong enough for a grueling trek through the woods. Not yet.
Which aggravated him more than anything else. The pain in his shoulder had ebbed to a dull throb that he barely noticed, but the fever had sapped his energy, left him weak when he most needed to take action. The feeling was intolerable. It seemed as if his own body had joined the conspiracy against him.
And he already had enough to contend with: time quickly running short, marshalmen somewhere hunting for him, no weapons on hand.
And this stubbornly cheerful lady chained to his ankle.
Who vexed him in ways he didn’t want to think about.
Nicholas picked up the flask by his side and drank a long swallow of clear, cool water, wishing it were fiery, bracing whiskey instead. “You’re right. Why worry?” He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “It’s only a matter of life and death. Ours.”
She gazed up at the night sky, her expression still unconcerned. “My point exactly. Don’t you think that if we were meant to die, we would have died in that cave? Or drowned in the whirlpool? Or been caught by the dogs on the riverbank?”
“I don’t believe in fate, Miss Delafield.”
“Neither do I,” she said adamantly. “There aren’t any guarantees in life. I know that. Believe me, I know that.” She closed her eyes, and her voice was softer when she continued. “But we didn’t die. We’re alive. For now, for this moment, we’re all right. Isn’t that enough? Do you always have to look at the dark side of things?”
“I’m not looking at the dark side. I’m looking at the only side. The realistic side.”
“Fine.” She raised her head and shot him an icy golden glare. “You go right ahead and be realistic. I am going to lie here on the grass and listen to the wind and look at the stars and be grateful and happy that I’m still alive. Because for the last few days—”
“Seven days—”
“For the last seven days I thought I might never see any of this again!” She lay down once more, folding her arms over her chest. “I’m rather enjoying getting reacquainted with the moon and the stars, and when the sun rises in an hour or so, I’m going to enjoy that, too. And I would greatly appreciate it if you would shut up and stop ruining it for me.”
Nicholas bit back a hot retort. He normally wouldn’t sit still while anyone chastised him—least of all a woman. But arguing with this lady was clearly a waste of breath and logic.
He took out his frustrations by tossing pebbles toward the stream, testing the strength of his injured left arm.
Silence fell between them, as heavy as the chain that bound them together, as vast as the night sky overhead, broken only by the crackle of the fire and the liquid rush of the waterfall a few yards upriver.
A warm breeze ruffled his hair. Somewhere off to the left, a small animal ambled through the underbrush. The stream burbled over smooth stones as it flowed past, and silvery pinpricks of starlight reflected off the shallow waters.
If not for the ocean of troubles facing him, he thought sourly, still tossing pebbles, he might have found this little glade peaceful. Even pleasant. There was a great deal a man could make of a moonlit night, a soft carpet of grass, and a lady in a good mood...
He switched to his right hand, trying to cut short that line of thought. Ideas like that could prove dangerous to his health.
He didn’t have time for any kind of pleasure. He had to concentrate on getting his strength back and getting the hell out of here.
“We’ve been given another chance,” Miss Delafield said, suddenly breaking the silence. “And I think we’re going to be all right.”
He paused in mid-throw. “By what logic do you reach that conclusion?”
“Not by logic at all. By faith.”
He sent the pebble sailing off in a long arc, uttering a sound of derision. “To think I had started to consider you intelligent.”
“Pardon me,” she snapped, sitting up. “I should have guessed. You’re too realistic to believe in anything or anyone but yourself.”
“You’ve got that right, lady.”
“You’ve got it all figured out, don’t you? You’re in charge and nobody else.”
“Right again.”
“What you are is arrogant. Too arrogant and coldhearted for a concept like faith. Or even simple human caring.” Her gaze locked on his. “You might give one of them a try sometime.”
He caught that less-than-subtle jibe and purposely let it pass without comment.
When he didn’t say anything, she turned her back on him. The chain pulled taut. Shoulders rising and falling, she fumed silently and stared at the river.
Nicholas knew what she was angry about, and tried to ignore her.
Which was bloody difficult when he couldn’t get more than two feet away from her.
Just looking at her slender back, he experienced the stab of a too-familiar feeling: guilt. He was being a real bastard, taking out his problems on her. He owed her his life. He would’ve died in that cave if not for her.
Alone, he would’ve died.
His time in the cavern was nothing but a blur of pain and heat. He remembered none of it... except her, always beside him, cooling his brow, whispering encouragement, comforting him.
He had been lost, alone, beyond the bleak edge of darkness.
And she had brought him back. She had cared for him, cared about him, in a way that no one else had for years.
And now he was acting as if none of it had ever happened.
He glanced away, looked at the waterfall, told himself there was no reason to feel guilt. Or anything else. Aye, he would not have survived the fever without her. But she would not have survived the whirlpool without him. They had agreed at the start that they would keep one another alive. A fair trade. Simple enough.
At least it had seemed simple, just a few short days ago. He had even thought that he might have to kill her because she could be a danger to him.
And she still could be a danger to him.
But killing her, hurting her in any way, was utterly out of the question.
You’ve got it all figured out. He shut his eyes. Hellfire and damnation, he wished that were still true. He didn’t know how everything had become so blasted complicated. He didn’t want things to change between them, didn’t want to feel anything for her. He had to think of himself, as he always had in the past.
That was the only way to survive. The kind of simple human caring she talked about could prove dangerous to his health.
And so he said not one word to her about what had taken place in the cave. He had told her thanks. What more did she want?
What did it matter to him if she felt angry and hurt? He didn’t care. He did not...
He glanced her way, and somehow the word care stuck in his throat. It got all tangled up with the guilt and almost choked him.
No woman he had ever met in his life had made him feel so confused. No woman had ever made him feel anything at all, beyond simple physical desire.
What the hell was she doing to him?
At the moment, she wasn’t doing anything at all, staring off into the darkness, her spine stubbornly straight, her hair a flaxen cascade that fell to her waist. She looked almost regal, warmed by the golden fire, crowned by silver starlight.
Regal and cool and distant.
But he had glimpsed a completely different side of her in the cave. That he remembered vividly: the sensation of awakening to the soft brush of her fingertips over his ribs.
It had been worse torture than anything else he had endured. There had been curiosity in that touch, and more—the most innocent, tender desire he had ever encountered in his life, awakening before his very eyes. Directed at him. He had watched it happen... and been helpless to do anything about it.
But he wasn’t helpless anymore.
The thought flowed through him like a draught of potent wine. Hot. Tempting. He watched her, sitting only inches away. She might be cool and distant at the moment, but her tentative, curious explorations when she had thought him asleep told him a completely different story. One he couldn’t forget.
She might not be able to put the feeling into words, might not understand it at all, but he had glimpsed the unfolding passion in her, had seen it in the dark, molten color of her eyes when their gazes met. She wanted the same thing he did.
He felt his breathing deepen, felt the familiar heat uncurl in his gut. Reason warned him not to venture into these waters... but the awareness of her desire increased his own to an unbearable level. Damn it, he wanted her to touch him, wanted her to look at him that way again—not with haughty disdain or disapproval or wariness, but with longing. The way a woman looked at a man, in that moment of mutual hunger before they came together.
His body, his breath, his eyes burned as he stared at her. Fantasies rioted through his mind. He wanted those sweet lips to part eagerly for his kisses. Wanted that lush body to shiver with need in his hands. Wanted to hear her cry out with pleasure when he thrust into her silken depths. Wanted to feel her shatter with release beneath him—
Nicholas stood up abruptly, turned away, raked a hand through his hair.
He was shaking. Damn him, he was shaking. Like some inexperienced, overeager lad. He had never let any woman rob him of his senses like this. He had better snap out of it before he did something he might not live long enough to regret.
He was ablaze with a fire hotter than any fever. One that time and rest would not cure. One that only her touch would cool. Desperate for relief, for some kind of distraction, he looked around the glade.
Water might prove helpful. Staring at the pool below the falls, he started toward it.
“Where are you going?” she protested when the chain yanked taut.
“To take a cold bath,” he grated out. “Do you think you could enjoy the moon from over here? Or would that ruin your evening?”
Muttering a particularly unladylike word, she rose and trailed behind him. “We already washed up before. And you’re just getting over the chills. I don’t think this is a good idea.”
“I think it’s an excellent idea.” Under his breath, he added, “It might just save my sanity.”
“What?”
“Nothing.” He prowled over to the edge of the water. “Just cooperate for once. You can sit here on the bank and dangle your feet. It won’t kill you.” The pool looked to be only about waist deep, the sandy bottom visible even in the moonlight. He stripped off his shirt.
She reluctantly dipped in a toe. “I don’t know. It feels awfully—”
Nicholas jumped in, forgetting for a second how short the chain was.
Caught off balance, Miss Delafield pitched forward and landed in the water with an ungraceful splat. And went under before he could grab her.
She came up spitting like a soaked cat. “Damn you, you blackguard. You did that on purpose!”
“Oh, please,” he snapped, sick of having to defend his every action and explain himself at every turn. “I just wasn’t thinking—”
“Of anyone but yourself! You are the most thoughtless, selfish—” Shaking with either fury or cold, she seemed to lose her ability to speak.
So she settled for sweeping her arm across the surface to splash him with a wave of water.
Nicholas gritted his teeth. Never had he wanted to turn and walk away from her more than he did at this moment. Never had he wanted a minute—just one bloody minute—of peace and solitude more than he did right now.
The fact that the chain made that impossible frayed what was left of his temper.
“Your ladyship,” he said silkily. “It was an honest mistake.”
“Honest?” she exclaimed. “Honest?” She splashed him again, apparently warming to her newfound sport. “I don’t think you know the meaning of the word.”
“Listen, angel.” He splashed her back. “Let me warn you not to start a water battle with me.”
“Too late.” She struck a third time, undaunted by his threat.
And then it was all-out war.
They locked in watery combat fit for the Atlantic fleet. Barrage after barrage of froth and spray flew back and forth. Standing toe-to-toe, they soaked each other mercilessly, quickly creating a monsoon in the tiny pool. He advanced. She danced away. She sent a tidal wave toward him. He gave as good as he got. Both refused to back down, her righteous indignation easily matching his frayed temper.
Until she started laughing.
The sound was so unexpected, he almost didn’t recognize it.
Then a moment later, he found himself laughing right along with her. The situation was so utterly ridiculous. They had nearly been killed a half-dozen times, had little hope of making it out of Cannock Chase alive, would most likely die wearing these damned shackles... and here they were splashing around in the river like a pair of mad otters.
Hearty, genuine laughter welled up from somewhere inside him, from some deep, closed-off place that hadn’t been opened in a very long time. The sound blended with the silvery music of her laughter.
And the hostilities ended almost as abruptly as they’d begun.
He wasn’t sure who stopped first, but they went still, standing there with the choppy water swirling around them, both laughing, drenched, gasping for breath.
“Feel better?” he asked.
Cheeks flushed, eyes sparkling, she couldn’t stop giggling. “Yes,” she managed at last. “Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. And you?”
To his surprise, he discovered that the tension and frustration that had bothered him all night had abated. “Aye.” He wiped his wet hair back from his eyes. “May I beg quarter, or are you taking no prisoners?”
She considered it with a thoroughly serious air for one second. Then she smiled. “Quarter granted.”
That smile lit her features so beautifully that it robbed him of both breath and voice. The pool calmed around them, the glade returning to peace, the quiet sounds of summer reclaiming the night.
But neither of them moved.
Dripping wet, chilled by the breeze, Nicholas stared at the woman before him and found that he did not want to move.
Her hair and gown a mess, face aglow from her latest impetuous adventure, she stood with hands on hips, up to her waist in now-muddy river water, looking like a cross between a glorious sea goddess and an impish hoyden.
Solitude, he decided, was highly overrated.
“You,” he said with another warm laugh, “are not to be believed, Miss Delafield.”
“Samantha.”
“What?”
“Samantha,” she repeated softly. “My name is Samantha. Or Sam.... And you?”
Her eyes searched his, seeking. Wanting so badly for him to give her this one simple thing.
“James,” he whispered. “Nick James.”
Even as the words tumbled from his lips, he couldn’t believe he had said them. He had just told her his name. Not his real name, but the one he had lived by for six years. The one that kept him safe. The name of a peaceable South Carolina planter, a man who did not belong in England, who could not explain what he was doing in Cannock Chase, shot at, shackled, and on the run.
He had just committed an unforgivable breach of his own rigid code of security.
And he didn’t care half a damn.
He knew it was a gesture of trust. Knew he should be alarmed at the fact that he was standing there sharing secrets in low, intimate tones.
But he wasn’t.
The happiness that spread across her delicate features, the light in her eyes at the insignificant gift of his name, was worth whatever price he paid. In that moment, he couldn’t think, knew only that they were so close together that if he merely took a single step...
He took it. One step and the distance between them vanished. He raised his hand to touch her cheek, barely caressing her skin with his fingertips. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Samantha.”
Her lips parted. She didn’t reply for a moment, her eyes huge and dark beneath the shadow of her lashes. She looked up at him as if she had truly never seen him before.
And then she smiled, the most tender, lovely smile he had ever seen turned his way. “And I’m pleased to meet you, Nick.”
He felt astonished by the sound of his name on her lips, by the way it flowed over him and through him, like the water all around, gentle, sparkling, warm. Life-giving.
More stunning still was the fact that she did not pull away from his touch. Did not utter a word of protest or denial.
Even when he moved his fingers lower, tracing the fine line of her jaw, her chin. She felt as delicate as the wing of an angel, soft as rare Canton silk. Touching her with only the lightest contact of his fingertips, he tilted her head up, held her gaze for a single heartbeat of time.
And then as if it were the most natural thing in the world, he lowered his head and kissed her.
He covered her lips with his, sampling the velvet warmth of her mouth as he had been longing to do.
She shivered, perhaps because his beard tickled her. But she didn’t stiffen or pull away, didn’t resist at all.
Instead she responded, tentatively at first, allowing the light pressure... then welcoming him with a sigh of surprise and wonder in the back of her throat, a sound as soft as the wind in the trees.
And something that had been knotted tight in his chest unraveled. Something that he couldn’t explain, couldn’t understand, could only feel. The night, the glade, all the world fell away and he knew nothing but her. Samantha. He slid his hand along her cheek until his fingers tangled in her wet hair, urging her closer. She tasted of strawberries and summer, of night itself, of feminine mystery, fresh and sweet and more satisfying to his body and soul than any food or drink he’d ever known. He deepened the kiss and her palms came up to his chest, but she didn’t push him away.
Instead, she clung to him, trembling as if she would shatter if he released her now.
And her touch shattered him instead.
She was an innocent. God help him, he had never suspected how innocent until now. She had perhaps never even been kissed before. Certainly not like this. Yet she accepted him... wanted him.
Overpowering desire sank white-hot claws into his body, but he fought it. For her, he had to go slowly. Had to give her time to discover the passionate rhythms of her need for herself, even as they set him ablaze.
But it was too difficult to think of how very vulnerable and fragile she was. Too difficult to think at all. Especially when she yielded to him so completely, leaning into him as if her legs would not hold her. His arm slid around her waist and he drew her in tight. Angling his head, he urged her lips to part... and to his astonishment she opened to him.
All his hunger and longing poured forth, met and blended with hers. She was as brash and impetuous in her newfound desire as she was in every other way, holding nothing back. His tongue stroked along hers in a deft glide, exploring, claiming her satiny heat, and a moan came from deep in her throat, a sound of discovery. Of unmistakable pleasure.
It was the sound he had heard in his fantasies. A groan tore from his chest. Need exploded through him, hot and sharp like fragments from the stars overhead. As the dark water swirled around them, he could feel her shivering with need, with passion. His hand slid down her back, pressing her closer. Through the wet fabric of her gown he could feel every curve of her body—the way her nipples hardened to pearls against his chest, the softness of her belly against his rigid arousal.
Suddenly she flinched as if struck by a lash and broke the kiss. She blinked up at him, dazedly. For one instant she remained in his embrace.
Then her lips parted on a wordless sound of denial and she pulled away.
He didn’t let her go. “Samantha—”
“No,” she cried, struggling in earnest now. “No!”
He released her and she stumbled away a step, shaking. “I don’t... I...” One trembling hand came up to touch her mouth. “No.”
“Samantha.” He stepped toward her, unable to understand how she could change so quickly from sweet fire to cold fear in his arms.
“Stay away from me!” She rushed backward, almost falling in the water. The chain stopped her flight and she went still.
Unnaturally still.
Like a fawn facing a hunter, eyes wide.
Nicholas froze, confused by her reactions. “It’s all right.” He raised his hands in a gesture of reassurance. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
She had gone pale. “I’ve heard that before!”
“I’m not forcing anything on you,” he retorted, stung by her words. “You were melting in my arms, lady. You wanted that kiss as much as I did. You wanted—”
“No! I didn’t! I don’t want anything from you. I certainly don’t want you to... to...”
He struggled to gain control of his desire, his frustration, his temper. “Samantha, you don’t have to be afraid,” he said more gently, “I know this is new for you—”
“But it’s not.” Her voice had gone cold as ice. “It’s not new at all!”
Her words struck him like a fist in the gut. He couldn’t believe he hadn’t guessed the truth before—the way she pulled away every time he came near her, her fear at his slightest touch. “Someone hurt you, didn’t he?” Inexplicable anger poured through him. “Someone made you afraid. When you said, ‘I’ve heard that before,’ you didn’t mean from me—you meant from someone else. Who, Samantha? What happened to you?”
Trembling, she covered her face with her hands and turned away. “Just leave me alone. Please. Just... just...”
Go away. She didn’t say it, but he knew that was what she wanted. Bloody hell, it should be what he wanted too. Faced with a delicate, emotional situation like this, his usual tactic was to turn on his heel and make a speedy exit.
But this time, that was impossible.
Even without the chain, something inside him made it impossible.
He couldn’t walk away from her. Couldn’t stand by and watch her hurting because of whatever some heedless bastard had done to her.
“Tell me, Samantha,” he urged quietly. Driven by some force he could not name and could not fight, he moved toward her, slowly. “Tell me.”
“No.” She hunched her shoulders as if she wished she could disappear. “I don’t want to talk about any of it. I’ll be all right if you’ll just leave me alone. Just—”
“Tell me.”
“No, damn you!”
Ignoring her anger, her stubbornness, her curses, he turned her toward him and drew her carefully back into his arms. He wanted to pick her up and carry her ashore, but he couldn’t. The shackles wouldn’t allow it.
So he stood there hip-deep in the muddy water, holding her close, and simply refused to let her go. But she remained stiff, unyielding, angry. Frightened.
He stroked her hair, her back. Patiently showing her what he had already told her: that he had no intention of hurting her.
Gradually she seemed to understand, to believe. She stopped fighting and relaxed against him, yielding as she had before, but in a different way this time, a way that was more than physical. Then he led her out of the water, back to their place beneath the trees. Drawing her down beside him, he sat with his back against an evergreen trunk and eased her into his arms again.
“Samantha,” he said quietly, holding her.
Still trembling, breathing hard, she shook her head against his chest, remained silent for a long time.
But then the words began to come, slowly.
“It was summer,” she said, so quietly he had to strain to hear her. “The most beautiful summer night. A night just like this. I was sixteen and I didn’t have a care in the world... until that night. Until we heard the voices outside, strangers.”
“Where?” he whispered.
“Home.”
That single word, so heavy with emotion, choked off her voice for a moment. Nicholas had to swallow hard past a lump in his own throat. He kept moving his hand along her back, slowly, waiting.
“We lived in Northamptonshire,” she explained softly. “In the country. My father was a baronet. My sister Jessica and I—our whole world was... perfect.” A smile touched her lips for a moment. “Mother and Jess used to play the harpsichord in the evenings after supper... and we would hold marionette shows in a puppet theater that Father built for us... and every spring we made kites to fly out in the gardens, though the four of us always seemed to end up all tangled together.”
Nicholas shut his eyes at the wistfulness and love in her voice, keeping his arms strong around her.
“My father’s name was Sir Matthew Hibbert and my mother’s name was Mary,” she whispered, her smile fading. “And on that night... that beautiful summer night... the two of them had been to visit friends in Wellingborough. B-but on their way home, their coach was waylaid by riders. Highwaymen. Three of them, drunk, shooting off their guns. The coachman said that... that Father tried to protect Mother but...” Her voice broke. “They were both killed. Jessica and I were asleep when... the local magistrate came to tell us... our parents were dead. He asked me to... identify the bodies. They couldn’t recognize my father, be... because he’d been shot in the face.”
A shudder went through her slender frame, and Nicholas drew her closer, feeling the dampness of her tears on his chest. His throat tightened. He had witnessed horrors like that and worse in his lifetime—but for an innocent girl to see that, at such a tender age...
He wished he had words to comfort her, but could find none. So they shared the moment in silence, and he simply held her, letting her pain pour out. Pain and loss that reminded him so vividly of his own.
“Jessica and I were left all alone,” she said after a long moment. “We went to live with our only relatives, our Uncle Prescott and his wife Octavia, in London.” She wiped at her eyes, her voice shifting, becoming tense. “They took us in. Welcomed us with open arms. He told us not to worry about our inheritance, our land, our money. He took control of everything.”
“You mean he stole it from you?” Nicholas guessed.
“Jess and I were both so innocent, so trusting. We thought we would be safe with him.” She looked down at the ground. “But we had only been there a few weeks when Uncle Prescott began... doing things.”
She pulled out of his embrace, shivering, and somehow Nicholas knew not to reach for her, not to touch her. Not now. He let her spill the rest out, like poison from a wound that had festered too long and needed to heal.
“He would stand very close to me. Look at me in ways that didn’t seem right. Didn’t feel right. I didn’t understand at first. Even when he came to my bedroom one night.” She lifted her head, staring up into the dark sky. “I was so naive that it was beyond my ability to comprehend what he could possibly want. He was my uncle. I never guessed—”
“Samantha,” Nicholas interjected gently, “hadn’t your mother ever told you anything about men and women? Anything at all?”
She shook her head, her voice wavering. “Mother always said that when we were older, on our wedding day, she would explain everything... but she never... she never got that chance.” She wiped at her eyes again. “Uncle Prescott told me that he was concerned about me, that he wanted to tuck me in. When it became clear what he really wanted, I fought him. He kept telling me he wouldn’t hurt me.” Her voice became a whisper. “I fought him so hard that he broke my arm.”
Nicholas clenched his fists, filled with a violent urge to kill this son of a bitch.
“It threw him into a panic. He told me to explain to everyone that I had fallen—and he threatened that he would throw me and Jessica out if I breathed a word, to my aunt or to anyone.”
“So you left,” Nicholas concluded.
She shook her head. “I was sixteen,” she whispered. “I was afraid. If I’d had only myself to worry about, I wouldn’t have spent another night in that house... but I had to think about my sister. Jess was only fourteen, and she was so fragile. I knew she wouldn’t survive on the streets. And we didn’t have any money—he controlled every shilling of it.” She ran a hand along a tear in her skirt, over and over. “I was always the strong one. I had to protect my sister.”
Nicholas stared at her, stunned at what she had been willing to face for the love of her sister. He had always considered her gutsy, for a woman.
But he had never suspected the true depth of courage and caring she possessed.
“When my arm healed, he started again.” She sighed as if wearied by her story, by the telling of it, by the weight of her memories. “Then that winter, Jessica fell ill. I wasn’t strong enough for her this time. I couldn’t help her.” Fresh tears streamed down her cheeks. “She died, so quickly. And I was... alone.”
The way she said the last word tore through him. He knew exactly what it was to feel alone, desolate. Somehow her pain made him feel his own more vividly than he had in years. It was as if her anguish, her grief, poured through his blood, his heart.
She didn’t protest this time when he reached out and pulled her into his arms. She sagged against him, letting him hold her.
“I-I tried to slip away the next morning, but Uncle Prescott tricked me. He locked me in his library while my aunt was out, and he... he cornered me. He had me down on his desk, and he almost...” She couldn’t speak for a moment. “But I grabbed a pen-knife and used it to defend myself. I stabbed him.”
“It was self-defense,” Nicholas said adamantly. “You stabbed him in self-defense.”
“The warrant,” she said bitterly, “reads attempted murder. I was covered with blood. My uncle yelled for the servants and told everyone I had gone mad with grief, that I should be put in an asylum. He tried to have me arrested. But I managed to get away before the marshalmen came. I ran and...”
“Never stopped running,” he finished for her. He knew the rest.
She was crying again, exhausted, weary tears. The tears of a woman who had spent too many years running.
Too many years alone.
He cradled her in his arms while all the hurt flowed out of her. “Shh, angel, it’s going to be all right,” he murmured. “You’re going to be all right.”
It was little wonder that she feared a man’s touch.
The truly astonishing fact was that a lady who had endured so much at such a tender age could still believe in things like faith and goodness and human caring.
Could still feel grateful for something so simple as moonlight and a summer wind.
He closed his eyes, grimacing ruefully. Unfortunately for her, she was still too naive, in too many ways. She thought she knew the way of the world, when in truth she knew nothing. Her trust, her faith left her vulnerable to mankind’s cruelty.
While her fear, her misplaced anxiety, denied her one of mankind’s few genuine pleasures.
After a while, her crying ebbed slowly to silence. Gently catching her chin on the edge of his hand, Nicholas tilted her head up. He cupped her face in his palms and brushed his thumbs over her cheeks, drying her tears, all the while inwardly cursing himself.
He had been telling himself from the start that he didn’t care about this lady thief.
But she had come to mean something to him.
Which was impossible. He had no time for a liaison of any sort. They had no future. Not a week, not a day, not even an hour beyond the moment he got the shackles off. He had a job to do, an enemy to kill, and she was a complication he didn’t need.
But though they couldn’t share a future, he could share with her one precious gift, now, tonight. Much as she had given to him in the cave, with her soft voice, her gentle touch, bringing him warmth, light, life, he could now give to her.
What had been stolen from her by her bastard uncle could be returned.
By one wayward ex-pirate. For once, perhaps Nicholas Brogan could put someone else’s needs ahead of his own.
Give without taking.
Experience for himself what simple human caring felt like.
“Samantha,” he asked softly, “are you still afraid of me?”
Her lower lip quivered. “A little.”
He smiled at the open honesty he had come to expect from her. “Do you trust me, at least a little?”
“Yes.”
That made his smile broaden. “What happens between a man and a woman... angel, what you’ve learned about it is all wrong. It isn’t supposed to be about force and pain and hurting someone.”
She looked dubious, uncertain.
“You’ve been made afraid of something that’s a natural, vital part of every man... and every woman.” He stroked his fingers along her jawline. “It’s supposed to be about pleasure. Especially for the woman.”
That made her look downright skeptical.
“When it’s good, when it’s right, it’s the greatest feeling a man and woman can share.” He brushed his thumb over her mouth. “Let me show you, angel.” He phrased it as a question, a gentle entreaty. “Let me show you.”
Run Wild (Escape with a Scoundrel)
Shelly Thacker's books
- My Double Life Wild and Wicked
- Wild and Wicked (Wal-Mart Edition)
- WILD MEN OF ALASKA
- Wildest Dreams
- Iris (The Wild Side)
- Dark Wild Night
- And the Miss Ran Away With the Rake
- Dance With Me
- Dicing with the Dangerous Lord
- Gone with the Wolf
- Here With You (A Laurel Heights Novel)
- Marital Bitch (Men with Badges)
- Not Without Juliet
- NYC Angels Flirting with Danger
- Shipwrecked with Mr. Wrong
- Stranded with a Billionaire
- What's Life Without the Sprinkles
- Every Second with You
- One Night with Her Ex
- Be with Me(Wait for You)
- Thief (Love Me With Lies #3)
- Dirty Red (Love Me With Lies)
- THE TROUBLE WITH PAPER PLANES
- Forever with You