Rock All Night

106




I was watching the lights of Las Vegas from the hotel suite’s gigantic glass windows, thinking how beautiful and uncomplicated it seemed out there, when I heard the door open.

His boots whispered over the carpet until he was right behind me. I felt his strong arms circle around my waist.

“You disappeared on me,” he murmured in my ear, then proceeded to kiss my neck.

I almost gave in. It felt so good to be held by him… to feel his lips on my skin…

But I didn’t.

I shrugged him off and moved closer to the window. “Don’t.”

There was a long pause behind me.

Then a sigh.

“Okay, I’m sorry. I was pissed off – ”

“So you decided to call me a bitch in front of 20,000 people?”

“The Garden only holds 16,000,” he said, trying for a lame joke.

When I didn’t respond, he groaned. “I was singing a song. Nobody knew I was talking about you – ”

“Ryan did. Killian did.”

“Yeah, so did Riley, and I noticed you palling around with her at the after-party.”


“I’m surprised you had enough time to notice, given how many actual bitches YOU were palling around with.”

I turned away from the window and looked at him. I could only see his silhouette; a nightlight in the bathroom was the only thing that outlined him against the darkness. But I could tell he was clenching his fists – that the muscles in his arms were taut – that he was trying to keep his anger from exploding.

And suddenly, I was just… so… tired.

Of fighting…

Of being jealous…

Of not being happy…

Of everything.

“Look… I don’t want to fight. Not now. I’m tired of fighting. Can we just… call it a day on this one and forget about it for a while?”

His body visibly relaxed in the darkness.

“Yeah… I’d like that,” he agreed.

“Okay. Good.”

He moved in for a kiss, circling his arms around me –

I held up my hand and pressed it against his chest.

Stop.

At the same time, I averted my face. “I don’t want to sleep with you. I just don’t want to fight anymore.”

His body went taut again. He let go of me and backed away.

“Why are you being like this?”

“Oh, I don’t know – maybe because you called me a bitch in front of 16,000 people?”

“I said I was sorry!”

“It wasn’t much of a f*cking apology, Derek.”

“I thought we weren’t going to fight.”

“Well, we’re not going to have sex, either.”

I moved over to the side of the bed nearest the window and pulled back the covers.

He didn’t move from where he stood.

My temper got the best of me.

“Either let’s go to sleep, or go find one of your other 99 bitches you don’t have a problem with.”

My little dig didn’t make any sense.

I didn’t care.

I was exhausted, I was cranky… I just wanted all the bad stuff to stop.

He didn’t say anything, and for a second I wondered if maybe he was going to storm out of the room.

I was actually afraid for about two seconds.

Then he finally went over to the opposite side of the bed, sat down, pulled off his boots, and tossed them in the corner. Then he pulled off his jeans and his t-shirt and slipped between the sheets.

Ordinarily I would have had a tough time ignoring that gorgeous body.

Not tonight. I just wanted to go to sleep and forget about all of this crap for a little while.

I got into bed and turned on my side, facing away from him.

We didn’t say anything else.

Ten minutes later, I heard long, slow breathing that told me he was asleep.

Unfortunately, it took me hours.

And the entire time I lay there, I looked out at the Vegas lights in the dark and silence, wishing that I could be happy again.