When Parker came at me again, I blocked him. The tagging came fast and furious then, and I pushed all other thoughts aside until later, when I was home.
When Gideon came over about an hour later, he found me in the bath surrounded by vanilla-scented candles. He undressed to join me, even though his damp hair told me he’d already showered after spending time with his own personal trainer. I watched him strip, riveted. The play of muscles beneath his skin and the inherent gracefulness in the way he moved sent a delicious sense of contentment sliding through me.
He climbed into the deep oval tub behind me, his long legs sliding in on either side of mine. His arms wrapped around me, and then he surprised me by lifting me up and back, so that I was sitting on his lap and my legs were draped over his.
“Lean into me, angel,” he murmured. “I need to feel you.”
I sighed with pleasure, sinking into the hardness of his powerful body as he cradled me. My aching muscles softened in surrender, eager as always to become completely pliable to his touch. I loved moments like this, when the world and our emotional triggers were far away. Moments when I felt the love he wouldn’t profess for me.
“Soaking more bruises?” he asked with his cheek pressed to mine.
“My fault. My head wasn’t in the game.”
“Thinking about me?” he purred, nuzzling against my ear.
“I wish.”
He paused, then switched gears. “Tell me what’s bugging you.”
I loved how easily he could read me, then revise and revisit his approach on the fly. I tried to be as adaptable for him. Really, flexibility was a requirement in a relationship between two high-maintenance people.
Linking my fingers with his, I told him about my mother’s weird reaction after lunch.
“I almost expected to turn around and see my dad or something. I was wondering . . . You have security cameras that cover the front of the building, don’t you?”
“Of course. I’ll look into it.”
“It’s a ten-minute window of time, max. I just want to see if I can figure out what went on.”
“Consider it done.”
I tilted my head back and kissed his jaw. “Thank you.”
His lips pressed to the top of my shoulder. “Angel, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”
“Including talking about your past?” I felt him tense and mentally kicked myself. “Not right this second,” I hastened to add, “but sometime. Just tell me we’ll get there.”
“Have lunch with me tomorrow. In my office.”
“Are you going to talk about it then?”
Gideon exhaled harshly. “Eva.”
I turned my face away and released him, disappointed with his evasion. Reaching for the edges of the tub, I prepared to get out and away from the man who somehow made me feel more connected to another human being than I’d ever been, yet impossibly distant as well. Being with him fucked with my head, made me doubt the very things I’d been sure of just moments before. Rinse and repeat.
“I’m done,” I muttered, blowing out the nearest candle. Smoke curled up and away, as intangible as my grasp on the man I loved. “I’m getting out.”
“No.” He cupped my breasts, restraining me. Water lapped around us, as agitated as I was.
“Let go, Gideon.” I caught his wrists to pull his hands away.
He buried his face in my neck, obstinately holding on. “We’ll get there. Okay? Just— We’ll get there.”
I deflated, feeling little of the triumph I had hoped to feel when I’d first asked and anticipated his answer.
“Can we give it a rest tonight?” he asked gruffly, still clinging tight. “Give it all a rest? I just want to be with you, all right? Order something in for dinner, watch TV, hold you when I sleep. Can we do that?”
Realizing something was seriously off, I twisted to face him. “What’s wrong?”
“I just want some time with you.”