Chapter Twenty-one
Alyssa
I woke up relaxed. I yawned and then stretched my arms
above my head, accidently hitting something warm next to me.
“Thanks.” Demetri’s voice was deep and sexy with sleep. “I
love getting hit in my sleep.”
I laughed groggily and nestled back into his arms, resting
my head against his massive shoulder. “What time is it?”
“Time for more sleep,” he grumbled and then pulled me into
his body so we fit perfectly together. His lips found my neck and
soon I forgot all about sleep, all about anything except for the way
he made me feel. Safe and loved.
“This your idea of sleep?” I moaned as his hands dipped
beneath my shirt.
“Absolutely,” Demetri said between kisses. “The way I see
it.” His teeth tugged at my ear. “Is if I say I’m sleeping right now,
then I won’t get in trouble for doing this…” His hands cupped my
butt, rocking me closer to him. Warmth spread through my body
and then a knock came at the door.
“Shit.” Demetri sighed. “Sleep was just starting to get good.”
“Alyssa!” My dad shouted. “It’s time for work and you have
group therapy tonight! Get up!”
Demetri laughed and tossed a pillow in my direction
mimicking my dad’s words. Then he winked. “Your group leader
says stay in bed. Don’t make me punish you.”
I blushed and shook my head at him before laughing.
“Alyssa? Is someone in there with you?”
Demetri looked at the door and froze. “Crap, is this the part
where they break down the door and your dad chases me while I
run down the street with no pants on?”
“Probably.” I shrugged happily.
“Cool. On that note…” He jumped out of bed giving me full
view of his perfectly sculpted body. Damn his abs. With a seductive
wink, one that made my insides turn to mush, he threw on his shirt
and proceeded to shimmy — his words not mine — out the
window and down to the ground.
“You sure that’s safe?” I whispered out to him.
“Nope.” Demetri laughed. “It’s an adventure. I’m an
adventurous guy, just ask…” Lots of cursing followed as he slid, or
technically fell, the last five feet to the ground.
I had unlocked my bedroom door when I’d got up to go to
the restroom last night, which my dad just discovered as he pushed
his way into my room and looked around suspiciously. Geez,
you’d think he’d be encouraging me to socialize. Then again,
having a guy in my bed probably wasn’t his idea of socializing —
though it very well might be my new favorite thing.
I blushed as my dad’s eyes scanned the bed; the duvet was
pushed away and fell onto the floor in a pool, and both pillows
looked used. I blinked at him and waited for him to begin asking
questions. Instead, he rubbed his head, saying something under his
breath and then walked out of the room.
I exhaled in relief and texted Demetri.
COAST IS CLR.
He texted me back.
COME OUTSDE.
I threw on a long sleeve Henley over my tank top and ran
down the stairs to find Demetri standing at my door.
“What are you doing?” My eyes scanned his bed hair and
cocky grin as he stuffed his hands in his pockets and lifted his
shoulders.
“I forgot something.”
I examined him further. He was wearing all his clothes.
“Not clothes,” he answered, reading my mind.
I squinted against the sun and lifted my hand to my
forehead so I could see him clearly.”Okay, it’s too early to argue.
What did you lose and how can I help you find it?”
He took a step closer to me and then another and another
until we were nearly chest to chest. My knees felt weak as he
wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me full on the
mouth. I fell into him, easily trapped by his magnetism.
“Your morning kiss,” he said pulling away. “Good morning,
Alyssa.”
Okay, so I know swooning doesn’t really happen, but I
could have sworn in that moment that my legs gave way, that my
body swayed into his, and that I seriously saw fireworks go off in
the sky as he bent and kissed my hand tenderly then jogged away.
“Who was that?” My dad said from behind me, scaring the
crap out of my frozen moment in time.
“I, uh—” What was he? My boyfriend? No, that would be
crazy, wouldn’t it? “He’s my good friend.”
“How old is he?” Dad crossed his arms and gazed out
toward the street. Clearly he hadn’t seen Demetri’s face, otherwise
he would have known exactly who he was talking about.
“Thirty,” I answered deadpan.
“What!” The tiny vein in my dad’s forehead looked like it
was going to pop. Ah, it had been too long since I’d seen him show
any sort of emotion except pity around me.
I slapped him on the back. “Don’t worry, Dad. I know what
I’m doing. We’ve got a plan. First he’s going to move in here with
us, you know to be smart and save money. And then we hope to
get married and start a family, possibly build a second wing on the
house. He just got out of jail, so it should be hard for him to find
work, but hey, we have the taffy shop!”
“Thirty?” Dad repeated, obviously still stuck on the whole
age thing.
I nodded.
“Wait. What?” Dad shook his head and then finally looked
down at my face. I was grinning like an idiot.
Dad’s eyes narrowed. “Very funny.”
I sighed. “I sure thought so.”
“Great to see you’ve got your sense of humor back,” he
grumbled then placed his hand over his chest. “I thought I was
going to have a heart attack.”
“I keep you young.” I pointed my finger in his face and
laughed again.
And that’s when my dad burst into tears.
“Dad!” I reached for him, but he stepped away from me and
wiped his eyes. “I’ve been so damn worried about you, Alyssa.”
I sighed and reached for my dad’s hand. He took my hand
then and pulled me into a hug. “I love you. I’ve just worried
that…”
“Dad, I’m not going to kill myself.” My face was pressed
against his chest so hard that my voice was muffled.
He exhaled a long, slow breath. I stepped back. “I know.”
He held my hands in his. “But you aren’t the same person you were
a few years back. You used to smile.”
“I smile,” I said defensively.
“You rarely smile,” Dad pointed out. “You work longer
hours than mom and I, and you don’t have any friends.”
Why did people keep reminding me I didn’t have friends? I
nodded solemnly and shrugged. “I have Demetri now.”
“Do you think it’s smart to have only one friend who’s a
boy? What about girls? Don’t girls need that sort of thing?”
“I have Mom.”
Dad rolled his eyes. “Family doesn’t count.”
“I met Nat Murray yesterday. She’s pretty cool. And I met
Holly at group therapy. Maybe we can all hang out sometime.” I
gave him a firm nod and then punched him in the shoulder. “Cheer
up, Dad. I’m going to be fine.”
I walked slowly up the stairs to my dad saying “I can’t lose
you again” under his breath.
The thing was, I didn’t want to get lost again either. I
wanted to remember today, remember how it felt to be in Demetri’s
arms. To tell him all my secrets and have him give it to me straight.
I should have been mad at him, but he was so brutally honest with
me. More honest than anyone, Mrs. Murray included, had been
about my situation. He called me selfish. ME! The girl who watched
her boyfriend die as she tried to save his life.
I never thought of my grief as being selfish. In my own little
world it was like this little trophy I kept in honor of Brady, in honor
of his accomplishments and everything he was to me. It never once
occurred to me that by holding on to him, I was selfishly holding
onto my past and refusing to move on.
When I walked into my room, it hit me — a wave of reality.
My eyes scanned the area. The Justin Bieber poster was still on my
door, Brady’s sweatshirt was on the floor. My pom-poms sat
untouched in the corner, pictures of Brady and me littered one side
of the room, and yearbooks sat at the foot of my bed.
My room was like a tomb, a memorial.
No wonder I hadn’t been able to let go.
I looked at my cell. I only had about an hour before work. It
wasn’t much, but it was enough time to at least start what I should
have done years ago.
Heal.