“My bad,” Garrett stated, walking past me and back toward the stage.
I turned toward the crowd and wanted to scream. Everyone stared at me. Maysie’s eyes were wide, her mouth a perfect ‘o.’ Jaz stood off to the side, her arms crossed and a self-satisfied smirk on her face. Jordan looked concerned but annoyed as well.
And Damien, well, he was looking at me as though I had crushed all of his dreams.
Screw this.
I pushed through the press of people to get to the kitchen. I grabbed my stuff and left through the side door, ignoring the expected catcalls from Paco and Fed. I didn’t even bother giving them the finger, as I normally did.
I felt like I had been run over by a bus. All I could think of was the look on Garrett’s face as I cut him down.
No. I had done the right thing. We didn’t belong together and pretending otherwise would only be prolonging the inevitable heartbreak. That was not the life I wanted for myself.
“Riley!” I rubbed at my temples, trying to stop the impending headache. I caught sight of Gracie hurrying toward me.
Gracie stopped as she reached my car, out of breath and looking at me strangely. “You’re leaving?” she asked and I gave her a funny look. I waved my hand toward my car.
“That would be why I’m holding my keys and standing in front of my car,” I answered, trying to keep a reign on the sarcasm.
Gracie looked at me uncomfortably. “You and Garret, huh?” she asked in a tiny voice and I wanted to shut my eyes in shame.
“I’m sorry, G. I know you like him…” I began but she held up her hand.
“Don’t, Riley. Seriously, just don’t. It’s not like I planned for him to be the father of my kids or anything.” Gracie’s mouth twisted and I knew that she was more hurt than she let on. How could I, in all of the Garrett mess, had forgotten that my good friend liked him? Where was my sense of loyalty?
What happened to the girl credo Chicks before dicks? I felt like a heel. A total and complete jackass.
“I know, but I shouldn’t have…you know. I wasn’t thinking. The first time I was drunk. And then he was there after Dad and it just sort of happened. I really am sorry,” I said quietly.
Gracie shook her head and her smile was as fake as her knockoff Coach purse. “You’re my friend, Riley. I’m not mad at you. You’re going through a rough time. I’m just disappointed you didn’t tell me yourself.”
I sighed, wishing I could say something to break through the unbearable tension between us. I was a shit. I had hurt Garrett and I had hurt my friend. And for what? A couple of rolls in the hay? No sex was worth that.
“I’m an ass,” I muttered. Gracie lifted her shoulders but didn’t say anything.
We stood there for a moment, not making eye contact.
“I guess I’ll talk to you later,” Gracie said, her words clipped.
“Later,” I agreed and watched my friend turn and walk back into the bar.
“I’ll be at Jordan and Garrett’s this weekend. They’re finalizing the tour dates and I need to be there to help them get stuff sorted. Will you be okay by yourself?” Maysie asked, standing in the doorway of my room, as I got ready to go to my internship.
I looked at her in the mirror and arched my eyebrow. “Did I forget how to take care of myself or something? Do you need to be here to make sure I eat my vegetables and drink my milk?” I joked and Maysie shook her head.
“Such a smartass. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. We haven’t really talked about how you’re holding up after your dad and well, you hide things so it’s hard to know if you need me here or not,” Maysie said awkwardly and I gave her an appreciative smile.
“I’m okay, Mays. I swear,” I said, putting my brush down and standing up to face her. My best friend came into my room and gave me a hug. And I let her; because there were times I needed them as much as the next person.
“How’s your mom?” she asked me softly and I lifted my hands.