Out of the Depths

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

CHANCE CAME AWAY FROM THE meeting with Wharton Barge Lines feeling as if he could take on the world. They hadn’t settled with Harry Holloway, but even their big shot

attorneys from St. Louis had been placating when they realized he was willing to be reasonable. No ridiculously outrageous demands for hundreds of millions of dollars, but in a couple more meetings, Harry would have all he needed to see him and his family through comfortably for the rest of their lives.

Moments like this made him glad he’d decided to follow in his dad’s footsteps and more certain than ever he wanted to be a judge.

But, man! What an exhausting day it had been. The lack of sleep started catching up with him as he shook Harry’s hand in parting.

He checked his watch. Already after eight, and he still had to make an appearance at the Christmas Cocktails event the Women’s League was hosting. He considered changing out of his suit into the sweater he’d brought, but decided against it. He was simply too tired, and he didn’t plan on staying long enough to put in the effort. He would stay long enough to be seen, and then head home and hopefully get a real night’s sleep—provided, of course, he could keep Kyndal from haunting his dreams.

The cocktail party was being held at the Carson Center, just a few blocks away. He chose to walk, hoping the cold night air might bring some life into his weary bones. When he drew near, he saw the parking lot was full. A good sign. He’d be able to leave early without being missed.

Stepping through the door was like stepping into a holiday world for adults. Giant martini glasses filled with red-and-green balloons stood scattered about, flanked by shorter highball glasses filled with gold balloons to represent good Kentucky bourbon. The strong aromas of pine and spices blended, giving the odd sensation of enjoying a gingerbread cookie while roaming through a pine forest.

“Chance!”

Kiki Granger, in a sparkly dress cut so low he could see all the way to Atlanta, plastered herself against him a few seconds after he walked in the door. “Haven’t seen you in soooo long,” she cooed. The alcohol on the platinum blonde’s breath was strong enough to make him sway.

Not long enough.

He and Kiki dated for a while in high school, pre-Kyndal. He’d made the mistake of calling her when he moved back to Paducah. The damn woman’s libido ran faster than a Kentucky thoroughbred. “It’s good to see you, Kiki,” he lied as he extricated himself from her grip and set her away from him. “Is Colten here?” Maybe reminding her she was a married woman now would sober her up a little.

“No, he’s having a night out with the boys.” She laid a hand on his shoulder and stepped into him again, looking at him coyly from under her ridiculously long, fake eyelashes. “But you’re here.” Her finger toyed with his earlobe.

“And I can’t stay long.” He caught her hand with his and gave it a very businesslike shake. “Merry Christmas.”

He could feel her glare boring into his back as he walked away. One date with Kiki when he first moved home to Paducah had given him a clearer understanding of the term nympho. What in the hell had Colten Granger been thinking?

He spotted Julia Reinholt with her coat on headed toward the door. “Hey, Julia.” He caught her and gave her a quick hug. “Are you leaving so soon?”

“Yeah.” Her eyes clouded, and she gave him a tight smile. “I’m not much in the holiday spirit this year. I suppose you’ve heard…”

He squeezed her hand gently. “Yeah, I’ve heard. I’m sorry.” And I’d like to string up Stuart’s balls along with these holiday decorations.

She nodded, as if she’d heard his thought, pressing her lips together. “I’ll talk to you soon.”

He could tell she wanted to get away quickly, but her haunted expression compelled him to give her another hug, anyway.

“Merry Christmas, Chance,” she whispered.

“Merry Christmas to you, Julia.”

When they broke contact, she tilted her head toward the staircase. “If you’re looking for your mom and dad, they’re at the Scotch bar.” She arranged a scarf around her neck, then left him with a wave.

Of course, his dad would be at the Scotch bar. Bill Brennan loved his Scotch and had given Chance an appreciation for the drink, also. His tongue was already anticipating the smoky peat flavor.

He meandered in that direction, stopping to talk to a few people on the way, but eventually he found them just where Julia said they were, and they weren’t alone.

“Chance!” His dad’s face broke out in an uncharacteristically huge grin as he waved him over. “I want you to meet someone.”

Chance gave his mom a kiss and turned his attention to the woman leaning against the bar.

His dad made the introduction. “This beauty is Dr. Alexis Donovan, Alex Donovan’s daughter—Senator Alex

Donovan.”

Damn, Dad! Could you be any more transparent?

Alexis’s cool gray eyes smiled knowingly as she extended her hand. “I’m glad to meet you, Chance. Your dad has told me so much about you.”

Chance took her hand, admiring her firm, confident grip. “It’s nice to meet you, too.”

“I think I mentioned Alexis to you. She’s an ob-gyn with the new clinic.”

“Yes, I think you did.” The mention of ob-gyn brought Kyndal to the front of Chance’s mind, not that she was ever very far from it. Immediately, he started comparing the young woman in front of him to Kyndal.

With her hair pulled back in a tight bun, it was difficult to tell too much about Alexis’s hair. Nothing as gorgeous as Kyndal’s lustrous, ebony mane, at any rate. Her face was square-ish with a nose that was too long and thin to be in correct proportion to her other features. Definitely not “a beauty” by comparison.

“…told him I would introduce her to some people,” his dad was saying when Chance caught up with the conversation.

“And I very much appreciate your doing that.” Alexis’s cool eyes scanned the crowd, and then came back to rest on Chance. She opened her mouth, but his dad jumped in before she could speak.

“What d’ya say we ditch this party and find a quieter place to enjoy a drink?” His eyes swept from Chance to Alexis and then settled on his wife. “Maybe take a stroll down to Max’s?”

Chance caught his groan before it became audible. The happy glint in his mom’s eyes made him realize it was the first time the three of them had ever been out for a drink together. And, if it meant an hour or so of discomfort with his dad trying to cram Alexis down his throat, so be it. The time together as a family would be worth it.

“That sounds good to me,” he agreed, and was rewarded with a smile from his mom that warmed him to his toes.

“Me, too.” Alexis put down the Scotch she had been sipping. “I much prefer a quieter setting.”

They helped the ladies don their coats and stepped back out into the cold night air for the short walk to the bistro. A few flurries had started to fall, swirling in a festive dance under the lights of the parking lot as they made their way across.

“The weatherman said we may have a white Christmas.”

Chance smiled at the childlike tone in his mom’s voice. He gave her a hug as they walked.

“Oh, hell!” His dad stopped abruptly as they stepped onto Kentucky Avenue.

“What’s wrong, Bill?” Emily Brennan’s face tightened in concern.

His dad let out an exasperated breath. “I told Dick Hodges we’d talk to him about that lot in Florida before we left. Let’s go get that over with.” He grabbed his wife’s hand and waved to Chance and Alexis. “Y’all go on. We’ll meet you there when we’re done.”

Blindsided by my own dad! Chance gritted his teeth as he watched his parents hustle back across the parking lot.

“Wow! He’s good.” Alexis gave a chuckle that said she too understood what had just happened.

Chance shook his head in embarrassment. “I’m sorry. He means well.”

“I have one just like him at home if that’s any consolation.”

They laughed together and Chance noticed the tip of Alexis’s nose growing red in the wintry air. “Max’s is just down the street.” He pointed the way.

“You sure?” She gave him a wary look.

“I’m sure.” He looked at his watch. “They’ll show up in an hour or so.”

“Well, okay. As long as your arm’s not hurting too much.” Alexis darted across the street.

“My arm?” Chance asked as he caught up with her long stride.

She snorted. “The one that’s twisted behind your back.”

“Nothing good Scotch can’t help.”

Alexis agreed and related a short story of her own dad’s matchmaking, keeping Chance entertained the rest of the way to the restaurant.

* * *

“OH, I ALMOST FORGOT.” Kyndal reached into her bag and handed Rick a copy of Kentucky Wonders Magazine, gently folded and tied with a wide red ribbon. “This is both Merry Christmas and congratulations to the new—” she paused, raising her glass of club soda, and they all followed her lead by raising their wine glasses and repeating the long title together “—Deputy Director for the Western Kentucky Division of the Federal Department of Wildlife.”

Rick blushed again, as he had every time they’d recited the title, making them all laugh again at his modesty.

He pulled the ribbon and the magazine flattened, exposing Kyndal’s cover shot. Rick’s low whistle of approval was music to her ears, and it was her turn to feel her face grow hot.

“Thanks so much, Kyndal. This is really special.” Rick patted her arm affectionately.

Denise snuggled against his other side, and took a long look at the cover. “Is that the cave you and Chance were lost in?”

“That’s it.” Kyndal nodded.

“It appears quite innocuous, doesn’t it?” Denise shuddered dramatically.

Rick winked at Denise. “I thought the same thing about you, sweetheart. You appeared quite innocuous, but…” His shudder, which mimicked hers perfectly, brought on another laugh.

Kyndal was having more fun than she had in a long time, and she was so glad she’d accepted the invitation to join Rick and Denise and Jaci and Bart for Rick’s big announcement dinner at Max’s. Even if she did feel a bit like a fifth wheel.

After all the drama that had unfolded in her life the past two months, it felt good to be dressed to the nines and laughing with people she cared about. Best of all, it felt good to relax. Today had brought her no closer to a decision about the job in St. Louis, but this evening had certainly made her question whether or not she truly wanted to leave Paducah and her good friends—and Max’s blue cheese encrusted filet, which was to die for.

“So when do you think you’ll get the office open?” Bart had wolfed down a thick cut pork chop while Kyndal was only on her third bite of her scrumptious entrée.

“We’re aiming for the first of February,” Rick answered, “but we have a lot of remodeling to do, and the weather could slow us down.”

“But Rick will be overseeing the remodeling project, so he’ll be moving to Paducah next month.” When Denise expressed joy, her voice wasn’t nearly so obnoxious, and tonight she’d been thrilled with everything.

Kyndal watched the two couples wistfully. This is the way it’s supposed to be.

She took another bite as Jaci nudged her in the thigh, her hand hidden by the tablecloth, and Kyndal answered the nudge with a questioning look. Jaci’s wide eyes darted toward the window at Kyndal’s back.

Kyndal shifted back in her chair to gain the same vantage point of the street Jaci had, and instantly wished she hadn’t.

Chance, eyes crinkled in laughter, hair tousled by the wind. His perfectly tailored suit and crisp white shirt

enhanced his dark features. He looked as if he’d stepped directly from the pages of GQ magazine.

Kyndal’s heart leaped to her throat at the sight of him and then plummeted to the pit of her stomach as he held the door to the bar open for a young woman and followed her inside.

Kyndal had told herself this might happen, seeing Chance with someone else. Paducah wasn’t a metropolis, so the probability was high. She’d thought she was prepared—had told herself it wouldn’t be pleasant, but the discomfort would pass.

It wasn’t the first time she’d underestimated her reaction to Chance.

Her heart felt as though it had been ripped out and a block of ice hung in its place. The weight and the cold pressed the air out of her lungs making breathing difficult and speech impossible.

She was afraid to swallow. There was no way the bite of steak in her mouth could make it down her constricted throat, but that was the only way she could keep from bursting into tears. She slipped the bit into her napkin by means of a subtle cough. She reached for her drink to get some moisture into her suddenly dry mouth, but her hand trembled too violently to raise the glass.

This was insane. It was crazy to put herself through this, and these extreme reactions couldn’t be good for the baby. She shuddered at the thought of facing Chance this way for another seven months. Who was she kidding? This was going to be her reaction for the rest of her life. Chance was going to fall in love with someone and get married. The effect he had on her was one of those things time would never heal.

Jaci’s hand clutched hers, supportive and strong…and in it, Kyndal found the strength to do what needed to be done.

She cleared her throat and rapped lightly on her water glass with her spoon. “I have an announcement of my own.”

“Kyn…” Jaci’s voice said don’t do this and Kyndal gave her a look that answered I have to.

She forced a smile as she scanned their small group. “I’ve been offered a job as a pathology photographer at St. Mark’s Hospital in St. Louis, and I’ve decided to take the job.”

Jaci’s chin quivered and she took a gulp of wine as the others offered their congratulations.

The questions flew at her then as her friends wanted to know all the details. She concentrated on them, answering most of them to herself for the first time.

“I have friends who live in the Clayton area of the city.” Denise reached across Rick to pat Kyndal’s arm. “Let’s contact them and solicit their help to find you a nice place to live.”

Kyndal murmured her thanks, knowing she wouldn’t be able to afford anything one of Denise’s friends would be familiar with.

The waiter took the dinner plates and Kyndal breathed easier. Soon, she would be able to get out of there. Chance and his date were still in the bar, so maybe, if fate was kind, she wouldn’t have to face her misery again.

But why would fate want to start being kind now?

“I have a very special surprise dessert,” Denise announced as she signaled the maître d’. He nodded, and a minute later a waiter appeared, bearing a silver platter of Baked Alaska covered in sparklers.

The spectacle drew the attention of everyone in the restaurant and the bar, as well. When Chance stepped through the arched passageway between the two rooms just as Denise stood to give Rick a round of applause, Kyndal noticed the quaking of her whole body—the vibration of Fate laughing her ass off.

The events unfolded around her in slow motion, and she watched like a prisoner strapped to a chair, arms and legs too overcome with the weight of emotion to move. Denise waved Chance over. He stepped back in the bar to get his date. The two of them were halfway to the table before he saw Jaci or Kyndal, who were backed into the corner and shielded from view by Rick’s hulking figure.

Kyndal recognized the oh, hell moment when it registered in Chance’s eyes, and she saw the grim set of his mouth when he realized there was nothing he could do but see this through.

“This is really awkward. I’m sorry, Kyndal,” Rick whispered and shot her a sympathetic look.

“I’ll be okay.” But the steak was already starting to rebel in her stomach.

She couldn’t decide which would be worse. Having Chance so near and not making eye contact with him, or making eye contact with him and allowing her heart to be run through a shredder. She opted for somewhere in between, making contact in short bursts. Even those seemed like more than her heart could withstand. It beat at a sickeningly fast rate, and her stomach started to churn in rhythm. She sipped cold water, hoping it would help. It didn’t.

“Would you like to join us for dessert?” Denise asked when they finally reached the table. Mercifully, Chance declined. “My mom and dad are meeting us for drinks.”

Kyndal chewed her lip to keep it from quivering. This was a woman Chance was proud enough to introduce to people…someone his dad wanted to join for drinks.

Chance started the introductions, and Kyndal prayed they’d go quickly. “Alexis, I’d like you to meet Bart and Jaci Thomas, Kyndal Rawlings—” he slid over her name with no problem, no hint of emotion “—Rick Warren and Denise Macomb. This is Alexis Donovan, an ob-gyn at the new clinic.”

Of course she’s a doctor. The knife whittling on Kyndal’s insides took out a large chunk.

Rick had stood during the introduction and he extended his hand. “Glad to meet you, Alexis. Are you Senator Donovan’s daughter?”

The name of her nemesis blew a raspberry Kyndal’s direction, and she flinched.

“That would be me.” The young woman smiled confidently.

Chance’s date is the daughter of the man who kept me from getting the job.

Kyndal gasped at the sting of the final blow. She trembled under the weight of the irony, gut twisting with anger and the excruciating pain of her and Chance’s worlds colliding.

She looked anywhere to keep her eyes from connecting with his. Shifting in her seat, she caught her reflection in the window. There was the look in her eyes, the one she knew so well. No doubt about it, she was a woman about to bolt.

“Your dads worked together to get me this appointment.” Rick pumped Chance’s and Alexis’s hands enthusiastically. “I can’t thank them enough.”

Kyndal stood up abruptly, drawing everyone’s attention. “If y’all will excuse me, I’ve got to run. I’m not feeling well.”

She quieted everyone’s questions by forcing a smile, refusing to look at Chance. “I’ll be okay,” she assured them.

Jaci caught her hand. “Do you want me to go home with you?”

Kyndal shook her head. “Please don’t. I’ll be fine.”

She edged her way behind Jaci’s and Bart’s chairs and had almost pulled off the charade when Denise spoke up. “I’ll call you with my friends’ names and numbers, Kyndal. They’ll be glad to help you find a place, and there are many lovely places in their area of St. Louis.”

Chance’s head snapped in her direction. “St. Louis?”

She hurried past him toward the door, pretending to be too involved with getting on her coat to hear him.

“Kyndal’s taken a job in St. Louis.” Denise’s voice had reached a new high on the obnoxious scale.

Kyndal was out the door and didn’t hear the footsteps behind her, but a hand caught her arm and pulled her to a stop.

“Is this true, Kyn?” Chance’s dark eyes pinned her in place.

She nodded. “Yes. I’m moving to St. Louis.” Her stomach rolled with a fresh wave of nausea.

“When? When did this happen?” He wasn’t angry, as she’d expected. She could read the pain in his eyes, and it made everything so much worse. “Were you even going to tell me?” The pain echoed in his voice.

“Chance, please move. We’ll talk later.” She stepped around him and picked up her pace toward her car.

“We’ll talk now, damn it!” His long strides brought him around in front of her, blocking her way. “You know how hard this will make things, and how much this baby means to me. How can you do this?”

“How can I do this?” She started to laugh and cry at the same time as emotions tumbled around inside her. “How can I not do this? You and the senator’s daughter are having drinks with your parents.”

“It’s not what you’re thinking, Kyndal. She’s not a date. You were supposed to be my date. My dad just suggested we all have a drink, and Mom seemed eager, so I agreed.”

“And if I had been your date, would we be having drinks with your parents?” She read the answer in his eyes. “Of course not, but she can because she’s from your world. I have to make my own world—one that doesn’t include being your favorite charity. That’s why I have to leave here. Now move out of my way. I’m going to throw up.” She started to walk away, but he caught her arm and swung her around to face him, holding her other arm in a firm but gentle grip.

The movement was too sudden and too much. She lost the battle for control over the nausea. Before she could warn Chance to move, her dinner came up, spewing the front of Chance’s gorgeous, expensive suit.

Horrified, Kyndal became cognizant of people milling on the street and a few gawkers through Max’s window. She could imagine the gasps and the collective “ewwws” making their way through the crowd. Her face was already scalding with indignation and humiliation as she wiped her mouth with a clammy hand.

Chance still held her, and she lashed out in anger and embarrassment. “I told you to let me go.”

He nodded solemnly. “Yes, you did.” His eyes searched hers. “Are you okay?”

“What do you think?” She jerked out of his hold, and stepped off the curb, talking over the tops of the cars until she reached her own. “I’ve just thrown up in front of a crowd of people, and everybody thinks I’m drunk. I’ve ruined your expensive suit.” She groaned. “Why couldn’t you have just let me go when I asked you?”

She opened the door and swung into the driver’s seat, anxious to get away from the prying eyes watching the two of them. And more anxious to get away from the look in Chance’s eyes.