Norma Jean

chapter 3



Norma



I’m lying on the bed in the guest room of Stacy’s house. The ceiling is white with painted swirls all throughout. I used to think it was interesting but now I can’t stop thinking about the past. It makes me want to take him down. I want Chance to hurt as much as I did. This path I have chosen to go down might be hard but he deserves what I’m going to do to him.

I remember the first time he ever said anything to break my heart…



The wind blows through my hair slapping me in the face. Maybe it will slap all these hideous things off. Mom says it’s normal to have acne, but I really don’t think it’s normal to have your entire face covered in them. I feel disgusting and ugly. Mom dropped me off at the front of the school about 10 minutes ago and I haven’t even tried to walk in the front door. I’m scared. They will make fun of me. They are cruel.

I finally pull in a deep breath and forge ahead. When I see Chance Duncan standing by the front doors by himself, I cringe. I have the hugest crush ever on the guy. I mean who wouldn’t with all that beautiful hair and those amazing hazel eyes. The way he smiles with those full lips showing off his perfect white teeth. He is way out of my league.

I try and walk past him without bringing notice to myself, but he sees me anyway. I almost make it to the school doors before he ruins me. Maybe for life.

“Hey zitface, why you going in there? No one wants your ugly mug around here.” he says in his cruel voice. I used to think his voice flowed like melted chocolate but now it’s like getting stuck in a barbed wire fence.

I look up at him with my shoulders tense and tears shining in my eyes. A look of regret passes over his face and I think he might apologize but the hard look returns before he speaks again. “What are you looking at? No one gave you permission to turn your ugly mug this way. Go on before I catch your ugly.”

I can’t even stop the tears now. The salty wetness falls down my cheeks and I wonder if I can run from this place. Where would I go? My mom works graveyard so she will be home. So I turn back towards the door and walk inside with my head lowered. I don’t want them to see me. I don’t want to hear their jokes and the names they will call me. If one of the nicest guys ever thinks I’m so ugly, the rest of them will nearly kill me.



Chance really used to be one of the nicest guys ever. I saw him open doors for people with too much stuff in their hands. Someone spilled something in the lunch room, he was over there helping them clean it up. He says “yes ma’am” and “no sir” and not a lot of boys around here do. He was charitable, compassionate, and mannerly.

That’s what lead to my huge crush on him. One day I ripped my pants when I fell in the hallway. A rather embarrassing incident but before I could freak that everyone could see my underwear, Chance tied his sweater around my waist and took me to the office so I could call my mom. This was of course before I became the hideous monster of our school.

I do realize that he was going through a lot at the time. I had insider information from my mom, but it doesn’t condone all the things he said and did. It won’t change the self-esteem and social issues I now have. I think I will always have them, you just can’t erase that kind of pain. That’s why I want revenge. I want him to suffer just as much if not more than I do. I don’t really care if it’s wrong, what he did was wrong.

No one will ever f*ck with me again and get away with it.

It’s two o’clock in the morning when I hear a knock on the door. Since Stacy didn’t call to let me know she was coming home early I assume its Chance. Great just what I need. It even hurts that he left after that intense kiss. Which just gives me more incentive to f*ck him over.

“Come in.” I call out softly.

I try to hold in my breath so I don’t gasp at his face. The once flawless pale skin is black and blue around his left eye. His lip is busted but he looks even better than before. It throws off his good boy vibe and leaves an “I’m a bad mother f*cker” look to him. It’s only egged on by the glare in his eyes, which is directed right at me. Shit.

“What happened to your face?” I question.

“Marley.” he rasps out. Which is what I thought. Marley wasn’t too happy with hearing Chance kissed me…twice.

“Oh.” is all I have to say to him. I’m not going to apologize for it. I can’t really lie to my cousin, and I really needed cigarettes.

He looks at me sharply and I cringe deeper into the bed. He stalks his body over to the bed and sits down. He doesn’t touch me but I can feel his heat on my legs where his back almost touches them.

“Why?” he asks very softly that I almost don’t catch it.

I pretend I don’t know what he is talking about. “He asked me why I had sex hair and swollen lips. I can’t lie to him. I didn’t think he would beat you up.”

He rests his head in his hands with his arms resting on this thighs. He lets out a whoosh and shakes his head slowly. I feel like complete shit about it to be honest. I knew Marley would beat him up. I’m pretty sure when we were younger he threatened Chance within an inch of his life if he ever talked to me again.

“Why?” he asks again, this time with anger in his voice. Which I’ll admit makes me shiver.

I ponder on this question for a few tense silent minutes before I give him what he wants. “I don’t know why you’re asking me. You’re the one who kissed me last night. For some reason I won’t even begin to wonder about, I liked it. I wanted more. It’s the most f*cked up thing that has ever happened, but there you go.”

He turns those hazel eyes my way and something stirs in my belly. Something I don’t want to feel, yet I never want it to go away. A smile plays about his lips and I involuntary bite my lip. Then he speaks, and I wished he hadn’t. “It’s like opening my eyes for the first time ever. I’ve never wanted someone as much as I want you. I can’t figure it out. You’re the only person I should stay away from. Everything I ever said to you before this weekend was wrong. I could see what it was doing to you, but I couldn’t stop myself. Maybe I just want to make up for all that. I want you to be happy.”

At this point I’m very pissed off. If he wanted me to be happy and normal then he shouldn’t have been the reason I’m not. “You can take that shit and get out. I don’t need you to make me happy. You’ve done enough in my life.” I’m breathing heavy and I really want to punch him in the other eye. I truly think I might cry and I promised myself this a*shole would never make me cry again.

“I’m not going to leave, Norma. I want to make all that stuff up to you. You deserve to be treated with respect, like a human being. I have to do that.” His big warm hand smooths over mine and tingles shoot up my arm. I clinch my eyes shut to beat back those tears that want to spill.

“You want to be able to live with yourself, is what you really want. It’s actually really selfish if you ask me.” He squeezes my hand and I pretend I don’t like the way it feels. I pretend I don’t like the way he touches me.

“Look at me.” he softly commands. I keep my eyes shut. I will not look at him. We sit in silence again before I feel him shift around on the bed. I was hoping he was getting up to leave but I feel his heat above me. My body shivers of its own accord. “Look at me.” he whispers in my ear.

My eyes pop open and he is hovering above me. I think I start panting at this point. His face is in shadows, making his eyes black. It’s actually pretty freaky. “What?” I squeak out.

“I remember the natural color of your hair. I liked it but I love this black. It makes those violet eyes of yours pop and your skin a beautiful peach color. You freaking glow for crying out loud. It makes me follow you with my eyes where ever you go.” He says all this while staring into my eyes. It’s intense and mind blowing. “This face,” he says while his hand comes up to cup my cheek and rub his thumb along the bone. “May have once been something you weren’t proud of, but now, now it’s so beautiful. These red lips I go crazy for. This perfect little nose. Big ole eyes you can get lost in.” He trails kisses along each places he describes and I feel my hands bunch into his t-shirt, unconsciously trying to pull him closer. “I don’t want to make you happy for me, no Smalls, I want to make you happy for you. You deserve all the happiness I have taken away from you. It was wrong and I’m trying to make it right.”

I think that is the most I have ever heard him speak. It’s usually one word answers and questions. Grunted statements. Those softly spoken words flow through me and my brain doesn’t seem to work anymore. “Okay.” That tiny smile at the edge of his lips is back. I know what he is asking, in that unspoken way of his. Saying something without really saying it.

He kisses my cheek gently and my lashes flutter. My breathing is still labored and I start to wonder who is playing who in this situation. I start running ideas around in my head, something that will get him made fun of. Something he will never live down. I need to add a show of affection for me in there. Make him declare it in front of the whole school. It has to be epic.

He climbed off the bed while I was lost in my thoughts. He is just standing there looking down at me funny. “What?” I know I don’t have anything in my teeth or on my face. He was just up close and personal with it.

“I’m afraid of what’s in there.” He points at my head. That makes me chuckle. He really should be scared.

“So you like want to date me or something?” I ask with a cocky edge to my voice. I think I found the perfect thing for him to do. Now I’m just plain giddy.

“Umm…yeah.” And I pretend that just didn’t make my stomach flip. Yeah I’m in so over my head.

“Then I want you to go to school in a dress on Monday.” The look on his face is priceless. “And ask me out in front of everyone.”



Chance



The look on Creeds face says it all. I look completely ridiculous. Before mom got home this morning, I found one of her old dresses from when she was pregnant with me. The shoulders fit very tight but at least the rest is free flowing. It’s dark blue and looks even worse with my orange tennis shoes.

“That color really brings out the color of your hair,” he says before he burst out laughing. I don’t blame him. This was the stupidest thing I ever got myself into.

“Shut up.” I say menacingly. He shuts up though. “Norma.”

The new looks also says it all. “She asked you to wear a dress?” I nod slowly. “That’s f*cked up dude. I knew she was crazy.”

“She’s not. I just want her to be happy.” And I really do. I want to see her smile every day. I want to see that smile shine out through those eyes. Their violet color haunt me in my dreams. The loneliness and hurt project on every section of my brain. It’s all my fault.

“Dude, quit beating yourself up about that. It was years ago. She’s over that shit.” I wonder sometimes if he ever uses the eyes in his head. That girl is not okay. I notice the way she looks at everyone with anger. Everything out of her mouth is either rude or sarcastic. She pushes everyone away, and she is left unhappy, pissed off, and hurt. “Besides, you shouldn’t have to go through all this for some girl. I don’t care how hot she is. You wouldn’t have to chase any of these other girls.”

He’s right. I wouldn’t. They see a pretty face, nice body and they go in heat. I don’t want any of them. I want something or someone that will mean something to me. Someone no else has. Norma would give that to me. And I know this because she is the only girl I have been sexually attracted to. And I mean really attracted. Yeah I’m a guy, I get turned on looking at a good body on any of these girls. None of them have ever made me want to have sex. Not this badly at least. I think about her under me, on top of me, beside me all the freaking time. It’s unnerving. It took me a long time to figure it out though. “I know,” is all I reply to him.

“Here she comes.” Creed whispers next to me. He’s standing by his sleek black 69 Shelby he inherited from his dad. Seriously jealous of him on that front.

I looked up and there she was. The glasses and the crazy color extension were gone from her head. She looked almost normal except for the baggy band t-shirt and holey dark jeans. Plus the lime green converses. Though the way she swaggers toward me, makes me extremely happy. I don’t think she even knows she walks like that. I even notice a few guys standing around staring at her butt. Not cool.

She has the goofiest grin plastered on her face and I can’t help but to smile a little back at her. “I have to admit I didn’t think you would do it.” She lets out a giggle, and it’s very endearing. “Fine, I’ll go out with you.”

“Thank god.” I reply. I pull this hideous thing over my head and mange to catch her staring at my chest. I’m not built like a brick house or anything but I’m in shape and I can tell she likes it. I chuckle to myself and open the door to my truck, pulling out a black polo I stored in there before leaving my house. I wore jeans under the dress, because there was no way I was walking around in that dress without them.

After pulling on the shirt, I start to notice the parking lot was really quiet. When I first got here the same thing happened. I even had a few people take pictures which I’m sure are already on Facebook. Never gonna live this down. I got plenty of laughs but I’m glad she didn’t turn me down. It makes me want to jump up and down pumping my fist in the air. Not that I would ever do that.

Norma has a beautiful blush covering her cheeks and Creed is silently laughing. Every girl in the whole parking lot is staring at me now. Just great. Like I really want their attention, so of course I do something to make them get over it. Norma doesn’t see it coming as I cup my hands on her cheeks and lean my lips down to brush against her. I groan before slipping my tongue into her mouth after she gasps, letting me in. I can tell she is surprised but like every time before she surrenders to me. Her arms go around my waist and under the back of my shirt eliciting another groan from me.

I break away from those lips before we start dry humping in front of the school. That would definitely end up on Facebook. “I’m glad.” I whisper against her ear. And there is another reason I want her so bad, she gets me. I don’t have to explain myself when I talk in clipped sentences. I hate talking to begin with, so this makes it so much easier.

She rolls her eyes as she looks up at me. “Come on, let’s go to class.” She places her tiny hand in mine and drags me along towards the front doors of the school.

I look behind me towards Creed who has a small smile on his face and lift my chin. “Later,” he calls back.



*****



To say the day was strange is an understatement. By the time the bell rang for first period, everyone and I mean everyone knew I had worn a dress to school for Norma. I had people gawking at me all day because I had kissed her in the parking lot. I don’t think she fared much better. They all know our history and I’m pretty sure they were all stumped. I don’t really care what anyone else thinks. Only her.

Though she was more surprised than anyone when I showed up outside during lunch to sit with her. There is a patch of grass out back where a few of the smokers go at lunch. She about dropped her smoke when I sat down next to her. She quickly got over it until all my basketball buddies showed up because for some reason they would all be lost without me.

I hardly got to talk to her at all, but I figured I had time for that. Like Friday night when I plan to take her out for some food and to see a movie. Mom is off that night so she won’t have to watch Macy. Just her and me and hopefully no weird gawkers. You would think these people had better things to do then stare at us.

By the end of the day, I was so ready to get out of that place. She parked her cobalt three spaces down and when I got to my truck I looked up and noticed her looking my way. She gave me a small smile and blew me a kiss. Which was charming and made me laugh. The preppy it boy getting blown kisses from the rocker chick. We make a strange pair.

I pull up outside my house, my mind solely on Norma. Which is starting to be an all the time thing. Boy do I have it bad. Shaking my head, I climb out of my truck. Slamming the door I head towards my front door, with a small smile on my face.

“Mom.” I call out after walking into the house. I throw my keys on the table before rounding the corner into the living room. She is passed out on the couch while Macy sits in the middle of the floor playing with her toys. That little girl is something else. “What you doing baby girl?” I whisper to her.

She giggles at me, since she is at that age where everything is funny. Before I can get to her, she throws her arms up in the air and opens and closes her hands, wanting me to pick her up. I give her a smile and do what she wants. I head out of the living room quietly and head up the stairs to my room. We stop by her room to pick up a few toys and then into mine.

I set the wiggly thing down on my bed before pulling my laptop bag out of my closet. I climb onto my bed with Macy and set up shop on my lap, booting up the computer and opening Facebook. I click on the search bar and type in Norma Jean Davis. The drop down menu shows her face to me and I click on it. Her profile is private so I can’t see any status updates but her picture is adorable. It’s her with those glasses and her mom looking at each other and smiling. I can’t help but smile at myself. I click on the add friend button and set the laptop aside.

I play with Macy for a while before the computer shows I have a new notification. Which says Norma and I are now friends. I waste no time in private messaging her.



Chance: What’s your number?

Norma: Why?

Chance: Because I want to text you

Norma: I don’t know

Chance: You don’t know your own number?

Norma: Yes I know my number. I don’t know about giving it to you.

Chance:

Norma: Cute. 555-8945



I shut down the computer and pull out my phone dialing her number. It rings four times before her smokers voice comes over the line. “Stalker.” She says.

“Nope. Just want to hear your voice.” I state back. And I really do. It’s sexy as hell.

“Trying to butter me up, are you?” she asks.

I laugh into the receiver before replying. “Maybe. Or I just want you to come out with me on Friday.”

“Is it your mom’s weekend off?”

“Yeah.”

“Fine.”

“Good.” The line goes quiet as we enter awkward territory. So I try to make conversation. “What are you doing?”

“Watching Rydstorm move around on my bed.”

“Who’s that?”

“My snake.”

I think I nearly drop the phone. Though I’m not all that surprised. I knew she was hardcore so why wouldn’t she have a snake? “You really have a snake?”

“Yeah. He’s about 5 years old. Yellow and white albino ball python. He is a sweetie though.” She says through the line and I imagine her cooing at the scaly snake.

“I would rather not meet him. I’m scared of them.”

“Well aren’t you a manly man admitting you’re scared of snakes!” I can hear her giggling at me, but I don’t really care.

“Better than pretending that I’m not. Seems pointless.” Macy chooses that moment to throw her stuffed bear in my face. “Ouch, baby girl. No throwing things in people’s faces.” Her little chubby face frowns and she starts to pick up another toy. “Macy…” I trail off.

“Put me on speaker.” Norma says to me, so I do. Though I’m not really sure why.

“Macy honey. We talked about this, it’s rude and mean to throw things. Do you want me to feed you peas again?” Macy hates peas with a burning passion. I have no idea why mom still buys the damn things for her.

Macy looks terrified even for a one year old and I can’t help but chuckle. “I think that worked. I’ll remember to threaten her with peas next time.”

“It’s not a threat, it’s a promise. I would never threaten a baby.” She says in mock outrage.

“Sure…” I laugh.

“Whatever, I have tons of homework to do, so I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”

“K. Bye smalls.”

I go to hang up but her voice stops me. “Why do you call me smalls?”

“Because it’s funny. And you’re small. Like really small.”

“Okay big foot.”

I roll my eyes and hang up the phone.