“Are you feeling okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I’m fine,” I stammer. “Why didn’t you… keep in touch?” I wanted to ask her why she didn’t tell me, but changed my mind at the last second. This answer will be easier to hear rather than a meaningless excuse.
I hate to think of where I’d be in life right now had she told me. I know I would’ve gone home for Mason’s funeral and developed a relationship with Noah, but it’s unlikely Josie would’ve given me the time of day. She’d be married to Nick now and probably pregnant with their child because he has no problem getting his wife pregnant. I, on the other hand, can only conceive children when I’m eighteen fucking years old. Sterling is going to be so proud of me when he hears I fathered another child.
“This business makes it hard, and you didn’t exactly have a likeable manager. What happened to her anyway? Better yet, where the hell have you been? I heard you went all rogue and moved out of LA.”
Right now I want a strong, stiff drink that’s going to knock me on my ass and make me forget about how screwed up my life is. I need to numb my brain and keep it from over thinking.
“My best friend died, and I went home for the funeral. Going home changed a lot of things for me. As for Sam…” I run my hand over my hair and sigh. There was a time in my life when I liked Sam. It wasn’t anything like what I felt for Josie, but the feelings were still there. What I couldn’t deal with were the lies and how controlling she was. She just couldn’t let things happen organically between us. My biggest mistake was leading her on and telling her that we’d try right before Mason died.
“When you go home after being gone for ten years without keeping in contact with anyone, you learn a lot about yourself and the people you left behind. I had a high school sweetheart who I had broken up with days before I met you.” Layla’s eyes go wide with understanding at what I’m telling her. “Anyway, I was home and shit started falling into place. We have a son that Sam knew about but hid from me. Once I found out, I terminated my contract with Moreno Entertainment and put down permanent roots back home - bought a house and all that grown-up shit we’re supposed to do.” I sigh, thinking about how everything changed after that. “Sam, she grew desperate and sabotaged our tour. We lost a lot of money, sued Moreno Entertainment and are still waiting for payment. Two years ago, I married my girl and a couple days after, Sam killed herself.”
Layla covers her mouth in shock. I would, too, if I were hearing this for the first time, but the shock of hearing about it doesn’t even come close what it was like actually living it. Sam harassing Josie was a nightmare – telling her that I was going to take Noah away from her, showing up at our house with nothing but lingerie on. Her destruction of our tour was the last straw. Something had to be done.
“Anyway, shit’s crazy right now. The band isn’t making any money. We all have families to support. We’re out here to help Trixie, but I’m hoping I can work a few deals and get us some headliners or something.”
“Do you guys still want to tour?”
Nodding, I finally take a drink of whatever it is that Layla made. “I miss it. I miss being on the road and performing. Right now we do a few sets at the local bar and my wife’s café, but it’s not the same.”
“I know what you mean. After I had Naomi, shit got hard. Touring with a baby was stressful, but I didn’t want to leave her. I also didn’t want to quit partying, but something had to give. So now I write music. My songs are selling to artists bigger than I ever would’ve gotten, so I still feel successful.”
All thoughts have turned back to her daughter when she says her name. It’s fitting that her name is similar to Noah’s. It’s showing me how much of a fuck up I am and makes me wonder what the fuck Josie is even doing with me. I put the glass down and take a deep breath.
“When I can meet her, Layla?”
“Who?” she asks. I hate that she’s playing dumb. It’s the most annoying thing when women do this. She knows exactly what I’m referring to and still won’t come out and say what I don’t want to hear.
“Naomi.”
“Why would you want to meet her?”
I put my drink down and fold my hands together. “I’ve lost enough time with one child; I don’t want to lose anymore. I can understand if you don’t want me to be a part of her life but I’d at least like to meet her. She has a brother just a bit older than her. They should at least know each other.”
Layla’s eyes go wide, and she starts shaking her head. “Naomi isn’t your daughter, Liam.”
I take her words in, repeating them over and over again in my head. Relief washes over me, yet I’m still confused. “But you said –”
“What I said was that I got pregnant after a one night stand, which yes, you and I had and yes, we had done ecstasy, but it wasn’t you who knocked me up.”