Yeah, I was going to lose this case, but Matt said it would be good to cut my teeth on. That also meant no pressure.
A knock on my door causes me to look up, and it’s Matt. I’d like to tell you that I could look at him without my blood racing through my veins or my heart tripping all over itself.
But I’d be lying.
“Can I come in?” he asks.
“Sure,” I tell him and watch as he steps in and closes the door behind him.
I expect him to sit down across from me, but he walks right up to where I’m sitting. His hand reaches out and cups me behind the neck, pulling me up from the chair.
I’m powerless to stop, my body betraying me quickly.
Matt leans in and nuzzles my neck. “I’m coming home with you tonight, Mac.”
His voice is low, husky… filled with promise. It makes my toes curl inside my pumps.
Yes, home with me. That is what every part of my body is telling my brain.
Well… not every part. My heart rears its ugly head up and practically roars at me. “Don’t be a fool, McKayla.”
My hands come up to Matt’s chest, and I push him back. I keep pushing until he releases me, and there’s a foot of space between us.
“No,” I tell him firmly. “You’re not.”
Anger flashes across his face. “I don’t get it. You want me, and I want you. Why are you being this way?”
“I do want you,” I admit. “I want you a lot. But I want more than just sex. I need more than just sex.”
He stares at me, confusion written all over his beautiful face. His words are slow and cautious when he asks, “What more do you need?”
“I want a relationship. Dating, conversation, shared secrets. I want it all, Matt. I deserve it all.”
He soaks in what I’m saying, but then his shoulders sag slightly. “I don’t have that to give.”
“Yeah, you do,” I tell him. “You showed me you do in Nashville. You have a lot to give.”
I reach my hand out, intending to take his in mine. To give him soft and reassuring contact, so my skittish beast of a man doesn’t flee.
Too late. He steps back out of my reach and his face hardens. “Are you seeing someone?” he asks with suspicion. Then it’s like a look of horror that crosses his face. “Fuck… please don’t tell me you’re dating Cal.”
“No, I’m not dating Cal. We’re just friends.”
Mocking condescension. Yup… that’s all over Matt’s face right now. “Please… that man just wants in your pants, and he’ll get there, too.”
“He doesn’t want in my pants,” I snap. “You’re just going to have to trust me on that.”
One side of Matt’s upper lip curls skyward, and he practically snarls at me. “See, that’s just it. I don’t trust you.”
That feels like an arrow shooting straight through my heart. I try to remember what Matt has been through, and I try to reason to myself that he’s this way because of past betrayal. But damn… it still hurts.
“I’ll ask one more time… Let me come home with you tonight. I won’t ask again, McKayla.” His voice is soft… with an almost underlying hint of pleading in it. I want to give in. I want to take him home and show him how good I can be to him… for him. But I’m deluding myself that it would ever lead to something that is good for me.
Shaking my head sadly, I say, “I’m sorry. I can’t.”
Matt doesn’t like that. Doesn’t like it at all. His eyes go frigid, and his chin comes up. He’s mad, but he’s also being rejected, and I know that hurts. I hope to God it is just anger speaking when he says, “No skin off my back. You’re not the only game in town.”
He turns away before I can even respond and saunters out of my office.