I didn't quite grasp that until moments later when he grabbed both breasts in his hands and began flickering my nipples. His strokes were intense and well met, causing me to feel his thick cock rubbing against a new wall. Up and down I moved. In and out he went. My muscles tightened and my stomach seemed to have disappeared. An orgasm tore through me and was so intense that tears filled my eyes. Azmir's tantalizing whimpers from his own orgasm caused them to overflow and fall down into my face as I plunged on his lap. More tears.
I couldn't explain the tears. I just felt emotions and I'm never good with managing them. It seemed that every time I connected with Azmir it stirred up something in me that I could not explain. He was so passionate and purposeful when we made love. It was as if he was trying to become one with me...fuse our spirits. Only, I didn't think mine was available. I felt so empty inside until moments like this. And when I came down from our intimate phenomenon, reality set back in and I was left empty once again.
“Hey. Are you crying? Did I hurt you? What's wrong?” Panic rose in Azmir at each word.
I winced of pleasure as he lifted me from his containment and turned me around in his lap. He ignored the mess made by his translucent specimens that were escaping me. I couldn't hold back the tears. I wasn’t sure how hard I tried.
“No. Don't cry. This isn't a reason to cry. Are you okay?”
After a few seconds I murmured, “I don't know if I can be what you need. You’ve been so good to me...so patient and kind. And I've been moving at a pace that makes me wonder if I'm fooling you...or me. I don’t want to hurt you,” I whimpered through my tears.
He was silent and I didn't know what that meant.
“I'm depleted. I don't know how to pursue, let alone, maintain a relationship—intimate or platonic. You deserve someone who can. You deserve so much more.” My cry went from weeping to all out bawling as I realized I’d betrayed myself. I told Azmir what my biggest fear was concerning him.
“Hold on...wait...wait,” he comforted as he rose from the seat taking me with him. He gently let me onto my feet then wiggled out of his shorts, lifted me in his arms again and walked me back into the apartment leaving the gorgeous view of the marina and the whispering bliss of our lovemaking back on the patio.
He ushered me into the master bathroom, letting me down on the floor. Azmir stepped in the shower to turn it on. After that, he began removing my lingerie. He pulled his black T-shirt over his head before leading me in the shower. I stood in front of him as the water sprinkled down onto my body. I then felt the soft scraping of the body scrubber being applied to my back. Then to my shoulders. He worked his way down to my feet before cleaning the front of my body. He let me wash my private areas while he washed himself. When I glanced over my shoulder to look at him, his eyes fell down to the floor.
What in the hell does that mean? Once again I’m lost for perception.
Once we were done, he reached over me with his long arms, turned the water off and went out to retrieve a towel that he wrapped around me then led me out. Azmir grabbed another towel to quickly dry himself and then wrapped it around his waist. He took the towel from around me and dried me from neck to toe.
When he was done and had wrapped the towel around my shoulders, “When I spent time in juvie I told myself that I would not be violated. I came up against a few brutal contenders but always triumphed, even if it were by the skin of my teeth. I also told myself that I would never return. I'm still a free man. About a week after my release, I told myself that I would never be poor again and that I would work so hard that I would have multiple businesses, giving me an empire. I think I'm at sixteen now...and steadily increasing. I told myself that if I found the right woman I’d pursue her endlessly and give her the world that I've abound. Weeks later you showed up in my boardroom requesting space on my property. I don’t make promises to myself that I can’t keep, Ms. Brimm.” He kissed me on the side of my head. I was at a loss for words.