“A.D. Jacobs. How may I help you?”
“Thanks for the iPad, A.D.” Rayna’s voice was calm, a little seductive even.
I grabbed my suitcase from the foyer and made my way up to the second floor in search of a vacant room. I was impressed with the house and having Rayna in my ear put me in the mood to go house shopping.
“No problem. Did you see the inscription?”
“Ms. Rayna Brimm, property of A.D. Jacobs,” she read from the back of the iPad. “I like that,” she hummed into the phone.
“Oh, yeah? What about it?”
“Oh, you know…”
“Ummm…no, I don’t. Do tell,” I urged.
“My vagina being considered your property. That’s the only thing you can be talking about because last I checked, nothing else about me had an owner.”
“Fair enough, but you do know wherever your vagina is so are you, right?”
“Correct you are,” she quipped.
“So, I can get a two for one’er on that?”
“Hmmmmm…we’ll see. You can’t barter deals from so far away.”
“Why?”
“Because I can’t read your eyes. I need to see them; they’re the entryway into your soul.”
“Hence the iPad. We could always Facetime from your phone, but the iPad will give you a better view.”
“Ohhh!” I could tell she caught on to the idea. “Well, let me fire this baby up for a test run. How does ten tonight, my time sound to you? You think you’ll be up for a little Facetiming?” she asked with a hint of promise in her voice.
“Bring it,” I egged her on just before checking the time to be sure I’ll be ready.
“Okay. I’m going to warm up dinner and feed Azna. I’ll hit you up once I’m showered and ready.”
“Girl, don’t start nothing I can’t finish,” I groaned.
“Oh. If you need, I’ll coach you into finishing.”
“Indeed.”
“Later.”
~~~~~~~~~~
I ended up at the Stamford Plaza Hotel about an hour later with Mark and Eric. The gazebo was nicely lit with heavy energy adding to the ambiance. The early autumn weather was fair, but I kept my blazer on. Fine ass black women of all shades, sizes, hair lengths, and textures wearing green and pink were all over the place. In many ways it felt like a candy shop.
The Alpha men were not as uniformed as the women. I’ve always appreciate seeing dignified African Americans gathered. I offered to order a round of drinks for me and the fellows, but Mark intercepted, insisting on treating everyone for the evening. I had a keen suspicion that he was still hoping for us to implement that bet of getting the most telephone numbers. Even by the way he attempted to buffer the bet by saying I could simply discard them at the end of the night, but I ain’t with that kiddie shit. I just figured I’d come out to extend my time with my friends.
Black women age so gracefully so it was difficult to tell who was of what graduating class. I started out making rounds with Eric and Mark and being introduced to their frat brothers and some of their sorors as well. I couldn’t take Mark’s salivating at every woman he encountered and Eric’s perverse whispering in every chick’s ear thinking it was appealing. I discreetly backed out of their company and played the bar. I was feeling a little buzzed and didn’t want to blow up their spot and embarrass them by clowning them.
As I checked the e-mails on my blackberry, the bartender called out to a guy near me, telling him that his drink was ready. The guy couldn’t hear him over the music and was walking off, so I pivoted quickly, trying to tap him to get his attention, only I accidentally elbowed a short stocky woman who cursed under her breath. When she turned to catch a glimpse of the perpetrator, as luck would have it, her eyes softened.