He nodded. “That figures. Kirk didn’t go anywhere without that damned laptop.” He sipped his coffee. “I felt so bad when I found out he was seeing Kathy. I know what great friends you and Amanda are. It caused a lot of guilt on my part, I can tell you. Kirk was my best friend, but then, so are you. Even to this day, Amanda doesn’t know. Kirk put me in an impossible position.”
It was clear from Joey’s pained expression that he regretted the uncomfortable situation he’d found himself in. Ella touched his hand. “It must have been difficult for you being in the middle of it all. I guess you had mixed loyalties.”
“I did. I just wished things had turned out differently.”
Ella nervously placed a donut on her plate. She licked the sugar from her finger and thumb. “I guess I’ve got a craving for one after all.” Any moment now and she’d find the courage to ask the one question she needed answered. Would Joey answer truthfully?
“What’s Kathy like?”
Joey took a deep breath. “Kathy joined our battalion about two years ago, as part of the Female Engagement Team. It’s thought that women are far better at gaining access to information than their male counterparts.” Joey shrugged. “Less of a threat I suppose. She was very vivacious and immediately fitted in. Everyone loved Kathy.” He cleared his throat. “This is a little difficult for me, Ella.”
“Please go on,” Ella urged. “It’s okay. I’m at peace with everything now. I just need to know exactly what happened.”
Joey looked uncomfortable, but continued. “Kathy and Kirk hit it off from the start. You know what Kirk was like. He always had an answer for everything. He obviously impressed Kathy with his silver tongue. The whole battalion knew something was happening between them, when they’d disappear together for long periods of time. When they started taking leave at the same time, they just couldn’t deny it any longer. It’s hard for me to tell you this, Ella, but Kirk was totally besotted with Kathy. He adored her. He worshipped the very ground she walked on. We all thought he was a lucky bastard to be honest. She had this power over men, and she picked Kirk, and claimed him as hers. He was powerless to resist.”
Ella felt her brows drawing together. “She had this power over men? Why are you referring to the woman who stole my husband in the past tense, Joey? Has she left the Marines? I expect she’s moved on to the next man, now Kirk’s not available anymore.” She still seethed with anger every time she thought of the bitch.
Ella watched the color drain from Joey’s face. “f*ck
, Ella. I thought you knew.”
“Knew what?”
“For f*ck
’s sake, Ella. Kathy’s dead. She was blown up by an IED on the road near Marjah, in Helmand Province.”
“IED?”
“Improvised explosive device. Kirk was two Jeeps behind when it happened. I think seeing her body blown to pieces like that damaged him beyond repair. Sure, he’d seen plenty of dead bodies before. As Marines on active duty, we all have. It’s something we learn to cope with on a daily basis. But he and Kathy were real close. I’m sorry to tell you this, Ella. But he loved Kathy so much he just didn’t want to live without her. I guess that was the difference. The medics checked him out. They said he was physically fit, but I was his best buddy and knew him well enough to know that a light had gone out in his life. The Marines insisted on him attending counseling. In hindsight, we now know it wasn’t worth jack shit.”
Her hands shook uncontrollably. She felt totally unprepared for this. Kathy was dead? She’d hated the woman for so long now. She found it hard to make sense of her own feelings. This woman had seduced her husband. It was now clear why Kirk had tried to strangle her. If Kathy had died, then so should she. The words he’d muttered as his hands had tightened around her neck, squeezing the life from her, filled her thoughts. In her mind she once again saw his face distorted with grotesque anger. His words still haunted her. It should have been you. It should have been you. It should have been you. He’d wanted her dead. When he’d killed himself, she’d na?vely thought it was the guilt of believing he’d killed his own wife, which had driven him to suicide. How wrong she’d been. Kirk didn’t give a f*ck
about her. He’d actually hoped he’d killed her. He didn’t care anymore. He just wanted and needed to be with Kathy. Kirk couldn’t stand the thought of life without the woman he truly and deeply loved.
Tears streamed down Ella’s cheeks. Kirk had hated her until his dying breath. He’d despised her. He’d rather join a dead woman than find some form of peace with his own wife. She knew then that she hadn’t been enough of a woman to keep Kirk alive. He’d hardly noticed her when he’d returned home for the last time.
Like a speeding roller coaster, her confidence started to slip away, faster and faster gathering speed, leaving her forever. She wasn’t enough of a woman for Kirk when he was alive, that was why he’d had an affair. So how could she ever be enough of a woman for man like Maximiliano D’Alesandro? A man who needed his sexual appetite fulfilled. A man who could have his pick of women.
Soon Max would tire of her. Just like Kirk. History would repeat itself.
Chapter Twenty-One
One week later