“What?” Stunned, Ella simply shook her head. It felt ready to explode with this new information. She felt as though Max had slapped her face. “Affair? I never had an affair.”
Max waved his hand disparagingly in the air. “I saw you, Ella. You’re f*ck
ing another guy. Kirk must have found out. It must have broken his heart. Deny it if you dare.”
“I emphatically deny it.”
“Do you deny your marriage was over?”
“We both already knew it was. It was over a long time before he went on his last tour of duty to Afghanistan.”
“I told you I didn’t want this conversation. That’s why I’ve not returned your calls.” Max rubbed his hand over his face.
“I didn’t have an affair, Max. You do believe me?”
Max grimaced and held up his hands in silent appeal. His silver-gray eyes bored into her, then he turned away and looked out the window. “Don’t make me say it.”
“I want to know exactly what you think, Max.”
He turned back toward her. “I followed you, Ella. I saw you.”
“Saw me?” Ella felt her brows draw together. The only time she’d been on her own recently was to get some advice from an ex-Marine who had suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder. The guy had never really filtered back into mainstream society properly, just like Kirk. She wanted a better understanding of the debilitating illness. They’d met at a run-down motel where the guy currently lived on benefits, and had spoken at great length. He’d given her some good advice, including coping strategies for both herself and Kirk, and phone numbers for professional help, should she need it. Immediately she clasped her hand to her mouth, her eyes fixed on Max. “Oh, God, no.”
The hostility in Max’s eyes was unnerving. He thought his friend had been wronged. Max needed to know what Kirk was truly capable of. Intense anger flowed through her veins. “f*ck
you, Max. I can see I’m wasting my breath trying to convince you. You’ve already made up your mind. Kirk had become agitated, and I went to see an ex-Marine. His name had been given to me by one of Kirk’s buddies who was concerned about his irrational behavior in Afghanistan. Post-traumatic stress and all its associated problems were pretty common after a tour of duty in the hellhole that is Afghanistan. I was at the end of my tether. I needed help, and I needed to help Kirk. I only wanted some advice, that was all. If you followed me and put two and two together to make five, then that’s your problem. I didn’t have an affair, and it really scares me that Kirk may have thought I did. Did you tell him?”
“No.”
“I know that’s not why he killed himself.” With trembling hands, she ripped the choker from her neck and pulled the collar of her blouse apart to expose her throat. “See this, Max. See the bruises. It’s been twelve days since Kirk tried to kill me. He tried to strangle me. Look, Mr. Judgmental, the bruises are still there. See. He gripped my neck so tightly, I passed out. That’s why Kirk shot himself. He thought he’d killed me. When I came to, I found him dead in the car with his brains spread over the windshield and upholstery.”
Once she’d regained consciousness, she’d searched the whole house in panic for her husband. Nothing. As a last resort she went into the garage. As soon as she saw the car, she knew. Blood splattered every window. That image had branded itself in her mind. If she closed her eyes she could still picture the horrifying, gory scene.
Ella clasped her hands to her head. The tears now flowed freely. “Do you know what it’s like to see the person you once loved vacant and expressionless, with half their face blown away?” She shook her head, feeling her world crumbling around her. “As you say, Max, it’s all my fault. Kirk’s dead, and it’s all my fault.” It felt difficult to breathe, and she gasped for air, choking on her sobs. “God, why did this have to happen?”
Without knowing, Max had walked around his desk. As soon as he touched her head she stiffened. Max of all people should believe her. Why didn’t he?
“I’m sorry, Ella. I didn’t know.” He squatted down in front of her and gently cupped her chin. “Let me see.” He raised her chin exposing her bare neck. Through blurred vision she saw him studying the bruises. “Have you seen a doctor?” His fingers glanced across her skin, smoothing over the bare flesh of her throat, sending tiny shock waves throughout her body.