Love Lost

“Divine, this has been a difficult time for my family. And Tara is still mourning her mother’s death. She swears out she’s lonely and now that she’s pregnant I can’t figure out for the life of me why you aren’t in her corner. I mean, if you guys are broken up I can understand…but like it or not she’s the mother of your child,” he ended getting a little emotional.

I stilled in my seat. I didn’t know how to tell him the baby wasn’t mine. The truth was I didn’t know it for a fact but my gut told me it wasn’t. This was such a delicate situation.

“Big D, you know in spite of what Tara and I are going through I would never treat her unfairly. I guess what I’m trying say is, there are some things…factors…details…issues…delicate issues surrounding our relationship that I don’t believe is my place to tell you. But please believe that no matter what they are I always remember she’s your daughter and therefore, treat her with a certain level of respect because of that,” I pleaded with him and that was all I could say.

I couldn’t tell him his daughter turned into a groupie and was fucking a rapper who didn’t even have an album out yet in a bathroom stall. I couldn’t even show him the tape that wound up in my lap of them fucking in the studio. It went against man-law.

Big D’s speculative eyes hit mine in search of truth. He wanted to see if I caved underneath them so that he could make his next move. I wouldn’t waiver. As much as I respected him like a father, I was a man. A man that needed to be respected and trusted to make solid decisions even where his only child was concerned. In retrospect, I knew I should have never fucked my mentor’s daughter, and if I did I should have limited the relationship to just that. It was not the best idea to take on a full fledge relationship with her. It wasn’t good for business. The one thing I had working in my favor was that I was prepared to leave the game now that I was legally making headway via my corporate endeavors. I didn’t need drug money anymore. I had legitimate returns on my profits. That was an entirely different issue I’d have to take on with him, but this one with Tara needed to be addressed first.

He sighed, “I get the impression that there are issues surrounding the breakup and I trust you like a son but I expect you to be a man,” he paused at the knock on the door. The runner had returned with his drink. As he took a long swig, I saw the heaviness in his heart.

“Have you ever known me to do anything other than that?” I asked not expecting an answer. Besides, he knew if he pushed for an explanation, he’d be risking the element of shock and disappointment. He once told me, “No man wants to know the freaky side of his daughter, he just wants her taken care of.” I extended my left arm across his shoulder as a sign of support. To return the sentiment he laid his hand on top of mine. We stayed that way for almost a full minute.

“Okay, young blood. I’ll let you get back to work,” he said trying snap out of the emotional moment he’d just had. “You know, even when I was your age I didn’t work as hard. You really need to relax and enjoy life again. I haven’t seen that spark in your eyes in a while now. Slow down and enjoy the fruits of your labor, son,” Big D advised while gathering up his things preparing to leave.

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