Just One Song

Epilogue


Nicole can’t see me from around the corner, but I don’t want to approach her yet. She has no idea how often I simply stand away from her, watching her, completely mesmerized by her. And it’s been like this since the first day I met her at that run down bar almost two years ago.

She stands just off the stage, watching the crew tear down the opening act and prepare for us to take the stage. I smile as she nervously alternates between biting the inside of her cheek, and running her fingers through her long chocolate hair. She’s absolutely beautiful. The most beautiful and amazing woman I have ever met and I still can’t believe she’s mine.

I watch her shift her feet, nervous for what’s coming and I know I should go comfort her. Wrap my arms around her and tell her everything is going to be just fine, but I can’t yet. I smile as she lifts her left hand slowly in front of her – looking at the wedding band I placed on her finger a month ago.

Is she remembering what I do whenever I see it on her hand, or the matching one on mine? How perfect that day was when we said our vows in front of our family and closest friends on the beach in front of our house? Because that’s what I see.

I see her long hair, blowing gently in the breeze, the blue ocean behind us as the bright sun rose high in the sky. There wasn’t a cloud in sight and I still get tears in my eyes when I think about how she smiled at me, and promised me forever. I feel like a p-ssy getting all teary-eyed over her, but I can’t help it.

“Come on, man. Quit drooling over your wife and let’s get this show on the road.” Chase’s slap from behind pushes me forward and causes just enough commotion that Nicole sees me stumble around the corner.

My breath hitches in my throat as she smiles nervously at me. I know she’s about two seconds away from freaking out and instantly I want to hold her and calm her.

I want her to calm me.

To promise me again, that we’re forever.

We both know it’s not a promise we can keep, but we decided to hope for forever and make the best of today for as long as we’re together and it’s a promise that I will keep until my dying breath. She’s been through too much to not make every day I’m with her the absolute best one possible.

I rub my hands through my hair, messing it up just the way she likes, and walk towards her. I ignore it when she absent-mindedly places her hand on her stomach. She doesn’t know I know. She doesn’t know I saw the test she took this morning before we left the bus, but she did a piss poor job of hiding it from me. But I won’t say anything to her; not until she’s ready because I know that she needs her time to process the idea of having a baby.

Our baby.

I’m ready, though. Ever since she told me she pictured us with a boy with my hair and eyes; it’s the only thing I’ve wanted besides making her officially mine.

“Hey, love.” I pull her tightly into my arms and breathe in her vanilla and raspberry scent. She smells almost as beautiful as she looks and I instantly want to take her in my arms and back to the bus and make love to my wife all night long. But we have a show to do. I pull away from her slowly when she exhales slowly.

“On a scale of one to ten, how badly are you freaking out right now?” I look down at her, hoping she can see how much I love her. How proud I am of her for doing this. I’ve put on too many concerts to count, but this one is the most important because my wife and my unborn child are with me. I’m the freaking happiest man alive right now.

We’re right back to where we began and I’m loving every single memory of the first night I saw her dancing in the front row. I watched her as I sang, her nervousness shifting to calm and then to joy. I watched every single emotion change in her as she adjusted to the music and noise and the only thing wrong about tonight is that she won’t be in the front row, cheering me on. Instead she’ll be behind me where I can’t watch her eyes sparkle like they always do when the music plays.

But she’s with me, and I’ll take every second of every minute with her for as long as we live.

“About a twelve,” she says nervously, with only a hint of teasing in her voice. Her eyes dart back and forth to the stage, the crowd, and me. She wants to run. I can feel how badly she wants to take off and run back to the bus and crawl and hide under the covers in our bed. But I won’t let her, she’s come too far.

I hold her hands firmly in mine and lightly brush a kiss across her wedding band. “You’re good. You can do this. Just feel the music, love and you’ll get it.”

The lights turn down on the stage, the crew exits and Chase leads us out. I lead Nicole on stage, walk her to keyboard, keeping her steady with every single step. I hate to let go of her and leave her; especially now. But she’s got this. She’s the strongest woman I have met in my entire life and I know that when the music starts, she’ll be completely in her element.

I give her a slow, lingering kiss and head to the microphone just as my spotlight begins to brighten. I nod to Chase who starts off the beat with the kick drum.

I look back one last time at Nic. I see her hands shaking with nerves and even from this far away, I can see her chest rising and falling as she counts off her own calming breaths. I give her a wink and blow her a kiss hopefully conveying that I know she can do this. That we can do anything, together, as long we love one another.

I strum the chord just once and smile as the crowd in front of me goes wild.

I call into the microphone as the rest of the band joins me, “Hello Minneapolis!”