"Honor," I said. "You want to know what I do now? Who I am? I provide protection for the club. You want to know why Crunch is here? Because I was ordered to kill him. And when the club finds out I didn't, they're going to come after us, and try to kill us." My dad was silent, and I could feel myself gathering momentum, losing control of what I was saying.
"You think that's terrible, that I've somehow changed into someone else, someone I wasn't before. You want to pretend I was some kind of hero Marine, just because I got a fucking award. Do you understand what my job was in the Marines? I was a sniper, dad. My job, the one you think was about having principles, being a hero - I took people out. It's the same thing I've done for the club."
I paused, only to catch my breath, watching my dad's expression. He was stony-faced, staring at me. "You want to pretend there's some kind of good guy underneath this, some kind of hero that'll just come out if I get away from the MC? There's nothing, dad. There never was. You think I'm doing something different, that the MC has changed me. It's just a different fucking uniform I'm wearing. Only this one isn't the one you're proud of showing to your friends. But it's the same damn thing."
He was silent for a moment, then looked at me, his eyes narrowed. "It's not the same thing, Cade. I don't think that, not for a goddamned minute. And I don’t think you believe it, either."
June
"Hey Connie C.," I called as I walked through the front door. The bell chimed, and the air conditioning blew against my face as I stepped into the grocery store.
"Hey, honey." Connie looked up from where she stood, stocking produce. "How are things going at the house?"
"It's good. I just needed a couple things, and then I'll be back to organizing. I have to do all the yard work, add some fresh paint, that kind of thing."
"Well, you should get Mr. Austin to help you with all that," she said.
"I'll be sure to ask him." I'd ask Stan, but not Cade, that was for sure. Not after he came over that first night he was back. Thinking he could get drunk and wander over, sweet talk his way into my pants? As if all it would take was him looking at me like that. I mean, sure Cade was still hot. That look he'd given me was enough to make me wet. But he was obviously not the kind of guy I needed to get involved with.
Not if I wanted to stop making bad choices in the romance department. Cade had bad choice written all over him.
I browsed the refrigerated section, not sure what exactly I was looking for. I had no real reason for coming to the store; I was just a little stir crazy at home. Truth be told, it was harder than I thought it would be, going from a big city, back here to what was the exact opposite of that. It was quiet in the house, too quiet. I told myself it would be different when I actually started to have guests stay. Then the house would be filled with noise and I'd be dreaming of these quiet days.
I heard the bell on the door chime as someone else walked inside, and I picked up a loaf of bread, too distracted by what I was doing to pay attention to who it was until he was right beside me.
"Well, as I live and breathe," he said. "June Barton. Is that you?"
I looked up. "Holy crap," I said. "Jed?"
A big grin spread across his face. "I'd heard you were coming back to town. I was wondering when I'd run into you."
"I haven't been here that long at all," I said. "Just moved in. But look at you - are you a sheriff now?"
"I am," he said. "Got me a badge and everything." He grinned again, the same goofy smile he'd always had. "You look good, June."
My cheeks felt warm under his gaze. Jed had definitely aged well, which was no surprise. He had always been good looking, in that All-American California surfer kind of way. In high school, he'd really had the whole grunge thing down pat, going for a Kurt Cobain look.
"Look at you, though," I said. "No long hair and flannel shirts anymore? You're all proper."
"Yeah, they kind of frown on long hair in the uniform, you know. It's too bad. I think I could rock the hair I used to have." He winked.
I laughed. "I don't even want to think about some of the hairstyles I went through back in junior high and high school."
"I don't know," he said. "You always looked good to me."
Is he flirting with me?
He'd always been a bit of a flirt, even when we were back in high school. And I know he had a crush on me back then, but I was with Cade and Jed was a year younger than me, which in high school years was everything.
But there was no denying he was looking good now - trim, fit, the sleeves of his uniform stretched around the muscles in his arms. And with a buzz cut instead of his shaggy long hair, he had a military look.
That was exactly what I didn't need. I didn't need another hot guy from my past. And I certainly didn't need one who looked like a military officer, not when I was trying to get away from reminders of the military.
Jed cleared his throat. "So, you bought Mrs. Crawford's old place, huh?"
"Yeah, I'm going to try to run a little bed and breakfast."
"That'll be nice." He moved forward as a customer tried to squeeze past in the aisle, and suddenly we were standing closer together.