Hungry for More

CHAPTER 16



Amy Abigail Lester Burns.”

Amy fell back in shock. Madame Prizzo had summoned Maddie. No one knew Amy’s middle names. No one. Especially the unfortunate “Lester,” after her great-great-uncle Lester, the legendary con man from Tulsa. Plus, more tellingly, Amy could feel Maddie’s presence in her bones. She always could sense when her spirit was present—a warmth that started deep inside her. Madame Prizzo was the real thing.

Amy let out her breath and inhaled the rank but reassuring aroma of stale tobacco, soothing and familiar. She was with her people. With a true pro. It felt like home.

Madame Prizzo rolled her closed eyes, a repulsive burrowing of eyeballs under paper-thin lids. Eighty-two-year-olds really shouldn’t wear blue eye shadow, but Madame Prizzo still hadn’t washed off her costume makeup from her channeling for the manicurist, who had kept Amy waiting twenty minutes in the freezing rain.

Madame Prizzo, or rather Maddie, spoke again. “Now that I am no longer your spirit guide, you can know the name of your One True Love.”

They were more words than Amy had ever heard Maddie utter. The shock of it almost undid her. Who knew Maddie could speak in sentences? Why hadn’t she ever done it before? She looked around the trailer for signs of a con, but the place was clean.

Well, metaphorically speaking.

I miss you, Maddie, was what Amy longed to say. She longed to drop to her knees and beg Maddie to come back.

And yet, Maddie was finally speaking to her, and this is what she had to say? That Amy should be happy Maddie split because now she can have True Love? Amy pushed her longing for Maddie aside and focused on her three and a half months of pent-up rage, held in since the Oprah debacle. She let it ooze to the surface, to cover her pain with self-righteous pleasure. “I don’t want my soul mate. I want you.”

Maddie was silent. A fly landed on Madame Prizzo’s nose. It cleaned its face like a cat. But the woman was so entranced, she didn’t budge.

Amy was pacing now, her feet crunching on the filthy carpet. She could feel the fly’s million eyes following her. “Okay, tell me the name of my One True Love if you’re so hot to. I don’t care. I’m not going after him. Get it over with,” Amy said. Minutia to get out of the way so they could get on with business.

What if it was James?

What if it wasn’t James?

I don’t care, I’m getting Maddie back. I can resist James.

She pushed the thoughts away, irritated at herself for letting her mind wander off business at a time like this.

I am through with James .

“You must hear the name from the mouth of the one chosen to tell.”

“F*cking ass-backward fairy rules.” First the rule about not being about to know her own True Love’s name when she had the voice; then the rule that if she fell for her True Love, she’d never get Maddie back; and now, this nonsense of who tells. Maddie was such a rule-following wuss. Maddie was obviously no Gypsy, Amy was beginning to realize. No wonder they had never gotten along. She had always assumed Maddie was Rom. But assumptions were for chumps. Maddie was probably—Amy looked around the trailer, her eyes resting on a horse skull—Amish .

She closed her eyes. She envisioned a horse and buggy with a prim, skinny woman perched in the back, her spine straight and her hands folded on her lap. Gag.

Amy sat back down and tapped her foot against the leg of the metal folding chair. “Look, Maddie. I’m no fool. You want to get rid of me. This isn’t about my One True Love at all. It’s about you leaving me for keeps. If I know my True Love’s name, I’ll be tempted to find him. And when I do, I won’t be able to resist him, and you get to split for good, by the rules. You brought me to Roni so she could lay it on me—and you could set yourself free. I’m not an idiot.”

Silence.

Amy paced. “You like Roni better. She’s a pushover who’ll do your bidding. You want to ditch me. You’ve always wanted to. It’s true, isn’t it? And it’s true that once I find my One True Love, you can’t come back to me. Right? Backward spirit-dumb-ass rule number 6,412.”

“Yes.”

Amy felt the trap close around her. “Do I have to really love him or just, you know, boff him?”

“The physical act is of no importance—”

“Well, that’s what an Amish spirit with no body might think—”

“Are you ever silent?” Maddie boomed. Then her voice lowered. “Spiritual love. You must say out loud that you love him.”


“Is my soul mate James?”

There was no answer. “Right. The rules. Roni has to tell me.” Anger and frustration rose in Amy’s throat. She stood, turning her back to Madame Prizzo and staring out the smeared window at night sky. For a minute, she thought she saw something duck into the shadows, like someone was out there. But who’d be out on this awful night? Probably the wind and her imagination playing tricks.

Amy focused back on the problem at hand. So, she’d made some mistakes, used Maddie to con a few a*sholes and turn a tidy profit back when things were good. So what? This was America. You had to take your opportunities. “Roni doesn’t have the balls for this work. You know True Love isn’t all goodness and light. You know True Love breaks up families and ruins friendships. You need a Gypsy like me. I have the guts to go where it’s darkest and pry people out of their satisfied lives so they can find love. People who really need love.”

“People like you, Amy?”

Amy froze. That little spirit bitch. How could she?

Madame Prizzo began to rock.

Maddie was breaking free. Panic rose in Amy’s throat. She jumped for the old Gypsy. “Coward! Don’t go! Hear me out!” Amy felt the warmth drain from the room, the familiar inhale of loss, leaving her cold and drained.

Madame Prizzo shuddered, opened her eyes, and looked around with that stunned look channelers always got when they were set free.

Amy carefully removed her hands from around Madame Prizzo’s throat, took a step back, and fell into a dilapidated chair by the window, dislodging an angry black cat with yellow eyes. The cat hissed at her. Amy hissed back. Black cat, nice touch. I could learn a lot from this Gypsy if a gaping hole wasn’t opening inside me, threatening to swallow me alive.

Maddie wants to ditch me. She’s conning me, just like I conned people. Well, I won’t let her. I won’t ever hear the name of my One True Love. I’ll find Roni and get Maddie back without ever hearing. Sweet little Roni won’t last a month with Maddie ruining nice people’s lives with her crazy mixed-up names. Everything is fine. Better than fine .

Madame Prizzo lit a Marlboro. “One fifty, for you, dear. Professional courtesy.” She held out a wrinkled hand.

Amy felt in her bra for her cash. She counted out the bills and handed them to Madame Prizzo, who smiled, now sweet as pie with the cash in her fist. She unlocked a strongbox, tucked Amy’s money inside, and then lit a second cigarette. The first was still dangling from the other side of her mouth. Channeling was exhausting, difficult work, and Madame Prizzo looked more like the ancient Gypsy she pretended to be than the tennis-court gym rat she was. Always a little truth in any fiction , Amy thought.

“Did you find out what you needed to know?” Madame Prizzo asked.

“Sort of.” She wasn’t about to tell Madame Prizzo her business.

Madame Prizzo waited, but when Amy didn’t say any more, she stubbed out a cigarette and sighed. “Roni called me today to see if I had heard anything about how Troy was doing. I wasn’t sure if you were the real thing before. You can’t be too careful, you know, with strangers. But now that I see the voice really was yours—or at least that it responds to you—I see that you are the one sent to help Roni. I’ll call her back. Call her home.”

Amy tried to keep her mind on Madame Prizzo’s good news. She trusts me; Roni’s coming back . But the pain of Maddie’s betrayal threatened to overcome her. As she fought it down, the ache of James’s betrayal joined the tide swirling around her, pulling her further down. If her childhood memories piled on, she was done for. She blocked them with all her psychic might. Stay in the present. Deal with what can still be changed.

The first real conversation I’ve ever had with Maddie, and it sucked .

Madame Prizzo stubbed out the second cigarette. “She’s a good girl, my niece Roni. She doesn’t understand what’s going on. That’s why I sent her to Pittsburgh for a cleansing. To Madame de Guize. Do you know her? The best. But now I see that the spirits have sent you to help her. What does this voice want?”

Niece? Well, that was interesting. But what was most interesting was that the old Gypsy hadn’t heard a word of the channeling; the channeler usually didn’t, but you couldn’t be too sure.

“Helping Roni is why I came to this town,” Amy said.

“Roni doesn’t like it,” Madame Prizzo said. “Madame de Guize has gotten rid of hundreds of pesky spirits.”

“Only I can make it disappear by taking it back.”

The old Gypsy nodded, unsurprised. “Take it away with you. Roni doesn’t have the strength to endure it. She’s a good girl.”

That’s what I’m banking on. “I’ll take care of Roni, Auntie. Don’t you worry about a thing.”

Madame Prizzo was at the sink, washing the circus-show makeup off her face. “Did you say that you play tennis? I’d adore you to join us. There are some Rom I think you’d like. And I’d like to beat them in doubles next week.”

Amy tried to hide the happiness she felt at being invited. Madame Prizzo was her people. She didn’t need James and his restaurant crew. “Troy’s alone in the apartment. I should get back.”

“Good girl.” Madame Prizzo nodded.

Oh, if she only knew .



“You have to hold it together,” Madame Prizzo warned Roni later that night. They were at the counter of an all-night diner. Madame Prizzo was downing bitter coffee while Roni pushed scrambled eggs around her plate. “You made up a good plan, but then life threw you a curveball. You need to adjust. So, the real voice came? It’s an unexpected event, but we can work with it. It’s good you came to me so I could help you through this. And so you could listen in on the channeling. We learned so much.”

Roni felt like throwing up. That was pretty much how she always felt these last few weeks, but this was worse. If the real voice showed up for a channeling, what was to stop it from jumping right back into Amy’s head and telling the names again? Or worse, to tell Amy she was being conned? All her planning for nothing. The fork in her hand was shaking so hard, it banged against the plate, tapping out a nervous rhythm. “Why didn’t the voice tell Amy she was being conned? Or that I’m lying about being her new medium?” A wave of nausea rolled through Roni.

Madame Prizzo smiled. “Don’t you see? The spirit is on our side. Amy is right—the spirit doesn’t want her. Hell, would you? She’s a major con artist, Roni. One of the best. But she’s so weak now, it’s almost a shame to con her. She’s too easy. We should go for more. Go for everything.”

A surge of pity welled up inside Roni, but she fought it down. No more being nice. Yeah, let’s go for everything!

If only she didn’t feel so sick.

Madame Prizzo was talking again. “So, let’s put it all together. From what you told me about the channeling, we know that Amy and James are getting it on and that Amy thinks James is her soul mate. Now, thanks to Maddie showing up, we know that Amy can’t have her soul mate and get her precious voice back. So, tell me, Roni, what’s the next step?”

“Next?” Roni pulled out her book. Inside was the worn piece of paper on which she had scribbled her new plan now that Madame Prizzo was involved. She read from it. “Step four is to fake a channeling and pretend that Maddie says the only way she’ll come back to Amy is if she proves herself by helping Troy.”


The old woman scowled. “Child, that was the plan before we found out how crucial James is. Think, Roni. There’s a new person involved. How does he affect the plan? If you want in to this business, you need to stop being afraid and start being logical.” She eyed Roni’s shaking hands and squinched her lips in disappointment.

Roni flipped through The Art of the Con .

Madame Prizzo snatched it out of her hands. “Use your head, girl.” She smacked Roni on the head with the book.

Roni sat on her shaking hands. Sometimes she hated her aunt. So coarse and rough. She missed Les Fleurs, where for a few hours a night, when they served dinner, everything was beautiful and serene and perfect. If only life could always be like that—delicious, orderly, smooth, peaceful.

Madame Prizzo was watching her, her thin lips twitching with impatience. It wasn’t the first time it occurred to Roni that the hag-Gypsy Madame Prizzo pretended to be for clients was closer to the real Alexandria Prizzo than the stylish woman who spent her afternoons at the tennis club. The two sides of Madame Prizzo converged into one as she scowled at Roni.

“We make James and Amy split up?” Roni ventured.

“Too hard. Have you seen that man’s hands? Plus, he can cook.” Madame Prizzo got a faraway look in her eyes. “Who would ever leave him? Try again.”

Roni inhaled, glad that Madame Prizzo didn’t smack her with the book again. “We make sure that Amy thinks James isn’t her soul mate,” Roni said in a small voice.

Madame Prizzo nodded. “Very good. How?”

“I tell her someone else is.” Roni put her fork down and fought off a wave of nausea. “She won’t believe me.”

“The woman is desperate , honey. She has absolutely nothing. Don’t you see, that voice was all she had. She’s so wrapped around your little finger, she’ll believe anything you say.”

“That’s because she hasn’t seen me yet.” Roni held up her hands. Even her little finger quivered.

“Hmm. Yes. Here.” Madame Prizzo fished a bottle of pills out of her bag. “These will calm your nerves.”

“Can’t.” She patted her stomach to indicate the baby.

“I didn’t forget your condition, Roni. These are fine. They’re herbal. Natural Gypsy remedies from the old country. You don’t have to worry about a thing. You know, of course, that your nervousness is much worse for the baby than some herbs.”

Roni put the bottle in her purse next to her book, which she’d grabbed back the moment Madame Prizzo had turned her attention elsewhere. She’d think about them later.

“Now, let’s think about what more we can get from Amy. We know her brother-in-law the movie star is loaded and will hand over major bucks for a good cause like Troy. We know from the Rom network that she’s not above stealing what she needs if the brother-in-law doesn’t come through. What about that necklace she’s wearing? We should try to get that, too. It’s worth a pretty penny. And we have to think about James. Is he ripe to be conned, too?”

Roni’s head was spinning. “I’ll think about it, Aunt Alex.” She was desperate to get away. Tomorrow, she’d see Troy again. Only one more night in that awful skid-row hotel. She didn’t want to con James, who’d been so good to her and Troy.

Madame Prizzo looked around the diner. “Hey, you, what’s you’re name?” she called to an unshaven, thin man restacking glasses behind the counter.

“Abbot.”

“Abbot what?”

The man looked confused, but he answered. “Abbot Figes.”

“Okay. There it is.” Madame Prizzo turned back to Roni. “Amy’s soul mate is named Abbot Figes. Now she can be with James and still think she can get her precious voice back. Make sure you tell her. Fast. Since we’ve summoned the real spirit-voice, we may not have much time. We have to shift this con into high gear.”





The first act of cooking for guests is offering the proper invitation.

—JAMES LACHANCE, The Meal of a Lifetime