chapter Eleven
Ada had never worked as hard as she did in the week that followed. It was the only way she could push the feelings of helplessness, desperation and frustration that came with thoughts of Eddie, to the back of her mind. He was all she thought about, she couldn’t eat or sleep, it was only while she worked that she could forget, if only for a little while, the sight of that woman in Eddie’s arms, kissing him.
It must have been hell for Clive as she drove him like a slave master. She spent only a few hours in the office every day, driving from one end of Lagos to another for different projects - a two page spread they were doing of a new hotel, a charity event, a comedy show, the opening of an outdoor cinema- She was everywhere, she took pictures, wrote content, and even interviewed people. When Sophie called her into her office towards the end of the week, she didn’t know what to expect, she only hoped Eddie wouldn’t come up in their conversation. She knew that Sophie must have noticed that Eddie hadn’t spoken much to her at the awards. She hadn’t asked why, but it was only a matter of time.
Sophie’s desk was a mess, she had been dealing with so much more than usual and it showed. She looked tired but also excited.
“Okay.” Sophie drew out the word as soon as Ada walked in. “Sit, Sit, I want to ask you a question.” She eyed Ada thoughtfully. “You look awful. Have you been sleeping?”
“Sometimes.” Ada forced a smile. “I’m not much of a sleep person these days.”
Sophie frowned. “Maybe you should take some days off.” She said. “But first, I have news you’ll like.” She paused. “The Ministry of Arts and Culture is organizing an exhibition.” She said, her eyes never leaving Ada’s face. “They have all these artists, sculptors, weavers, and so on.”
Ada nodded. “And?”
“They want something more.” Sophie said. “So my question is this. Would you like to exhibit your work? It’s a big deal. A lot of people will be there.”
“Are you kidding?” Ada exclaimed. “Of course! Need you ask? It’s a dream come true.”
“It is, right?” Sophie smiled. “I thought you would say that.” She paused. “There’s a catch though.”
What catch? Ada’s roller coaster of excitement ground to a halt. “What catch?” She asked.
Sophie seemed to be considering whether to tell her. “This is what happened.” She said finally. “One of the organizers called me and asked if I knew anyone with relevant work.”
“And you thought of me.” Ada nodded, then frowned “But why would she call you.”
Sophie shrugged. “That’s the catch.” She said. “Apparently, she knows Eddie, the issue came up during a conversation and he referred her to me.”
Ada sighed. How cleverly Sophie had roped her in. If she had mentioned Eddie first, Ada would have been on the defensive. So instead, she had dangled the opportunity in front of her.
“He knew I would recommend you.” Sophie was saying, a cajoling note in her voice. “He obviously cares about your work.”
Yes, he did, Ada thought. Even she had to accept that. And yet, she felt so guilty, that after everything she had said, done, he would still think of her.
“I don’t know what to say.” Ada said finally.
“Try thank you.” Sophie said. “Well you would have to wait till he returns to the country. He’s in Angola, I think, some oil thing.”
“Do you think he…?” Ada started, then stopped and sighed. “I’m sure he’s very angry with me.” She said.
Sophie pursed her lips. “How angry can he be?” She said with a shrug. “Listen, Eddie is a great guy, and a good person, and he obviously likes you very much.” She smiled. “And I can see you have feelings for him too. Just stop overthinking things. Stop vilifying him in your mind and go for it.”
How exactly did a girl go for it? Ada wondered, but she said nothing.
Sophie handed her a card. “Her name is Mrs. Meg Aina, She is the head of the organizing committee, so she’s the one you need to impress. Give her a call and arrange a meeting, I’m sure once she sees your work it will be a done deal.”
And it was. Even though the woman had sounded brisk during their short phone conversation, she was all friendliness when Ada arrived for their meeting. Her eyes shone with delight as she studied the pictures Ada had taken along, two large sized prints and a couple of small ones. These are great! Mrs. Aina kept exclaiming as she studied picture after picture. Ada couldn’t help feeling the spurt of pleasure all artists feel when their work is sincerely admired, especially when some of the other members of the committee came in and reacted in the same way.
She waited outside for a few moments while the committee members had a small meeting to deliberate on her work. Based on their reactions to seeing the pictures, she knew she should feel confident that they would want to show her work, but she was still nervous and apprehensive.
Her apprehension disappeared as she returned to the meeting room and saw all the members were smiling at her. “Congratulations.” Mrs. Aina said, smiling broadly. “I hope you can do fifteen prints by next week Wednesday?”
So little time! But what did that matter. Ada nodded, smiling jubilantly. “Thank You!” She exclaimed. Thank you Eddie, she added silently.
“Then we’ll include your name in the program.” Mrs. Aina said, getting up to shake Ada’s hand. “Congratulations again.”
There was so little time. Ada’s mind churned with plans as she filled the necessary forms and submitted some of her biographical information, before returning to the office to share the good news.
The next few days were hectic. First Ada had to go through a heartbreaking process of selecting fifteen pictures from her huge collection. It was hard, especially since she thought all her work deserved a shot. Then there was the printing process. Thankfully, she had completed most of her tasks at the office for at least three weeks, and Clive was tying up loose ends efficiently.
Every day she went home exhausted, but happy and thankful for the huge opportunity she had been given. No matter how tired she was, every night before she went to sleep, her mind always went back to Eddie. She tried to call his number a couple of times, although she always cut the connection as soon as the call was redirected to the number in Angola. She wanted to talk to him, to thank him for recommending her even after all that had happened, She wanted to hear his voice, to imagine his dimples as he smiled at something she had said, but all it took to tie her stomach up in knots was the sound of the phone ringing on his end.
Time sped by so quickly that soon it was the day of the exhibition. When she had dropped off her work, she had been given a pass and told that she didn’t need to arrive early, that the organizers would take care of everything, but more than thirty minutes before the event was supposed to start she was already at the car park of the MUSON center, waiting. Even though she knew there would be other artists there to share the attention, she couldn’t help the weight of fear in her stomach. What if nobody liked her pictures? What if nobody bought them? She could hear the mocking words her father would say already echoing in her mind.
As she waited in the car park, she noticed the significant number of mobile policemen around. That could only mean that there were going to be lots of important people. She said a quick prayer in her mind.
Her phone rang, it was Sophie. “Are you ready for your triumph?” She asked without preamble.
“I don’t think so.” Ada replied.
“Don’t worry.” Sophie said encouragingly. “It will be fine. Where are you?”
“I’m already there.” Ada told her.
“Early bird.” She could hear the smile in Sophie’s voice. “All of us from Living Lagos will be there to bask in your success, Michael is coming too, and I invited Eddie as well.”
Ada heart started to thump. “So he is back?”
“Yes.” Sophie replied. “He arrived yesterday. We spoke while he was gone, you know, he’s really glad your work is going to be shown tonight.”
“Do you think he will come?” Ada asked.
“Do you want him to come?”
More than anything. “Yes.” Ada whispered.
“Then keep your fingers crossed, darling.” Sophie laughed. “Don’t fret. I don’t think he will miss it for the world.”
He didn’t come.
Everybody was there except him. Zubi was there with his wife, Sophie with her husband, everybody from Living Lagos, but not him, where was he?
She pictured him somewhere having a good time with the woman from at Sheraton. It was torture, but she couldn’t help it. Maybe he was having such a good time, he forgot about the exhibition. Maybe he had remembered and dismissed it, after all why would he come? For her? She didn’t even deserve it.
While she fretted about Eddie, her work was getting a very warm reception. Mrs. Aina personally introduced her to several people who had shown interest in her work. Business cards were pressed into her hand by all sorts of people as the word sold kept appearing in front of her pictures.
She would have reveled in the success, but she couldn’t. Even as she registered the delight on her friends’ faces at her success, she couldn’t help looking towards the doors, over people’s heads, trying to see if he had come.
She had already decided to call him, when he walked in. She had been half listening to one of the other artists talk about the advantages of ink over pastel - or was it the other way round - and thinking of how best to sneak out of the hall, to some quiet place, call him, ask him why he hadn’t come, and tell him how much she wanted him to be there, when her eyes went to the doors again, and there he was.
Her breath caught in her throat. She wasn’t cold, but she was shivering. She swallowed. He was looking straight at her and she couldn’t tear her eyes away. It felt as if all her breath had been sucked from her body, and the only thing keeping her upright was the sight of him standing across from her.
The smile on his face was the most beautiful thing she had seen all night. He wasn’t smiling at her or for her benefit, but it didn’t matter. He looked magnificent as always, yet more so in his black tux. How could she have let him get away? After all the sleepless nights spent thinking about it, she still couldn’t comprehend that.
She wanted to go to him. She had been thinking a lot about what she would say too him. Go for it, Sophie had said. Well she would. She started to move, and then stopped.
He was with someone.
The girl was standing beside him, smiling up at him, he turned towards her and whispered something in her ear and she laughed. Ada watched, feeling a bitter taste in her mouth as they made their way into the room. She turned back to her artist.
Something was going wrong with her heart. It felt heavy, and painful and sore. How could he? She took a glass of wine from a passing waiter and downed it in one gulp. How could he?
The artist was asking her something, waiting for an answer. She took a couple of deep breaths. What was she supposed to say? Oil? Pastel? His face looked concerned. Maybe he had asked if she was all right. She nodded vaguely, that seemed to satisfy him. He went on talking.
She stole a glance at Eddie, watching as he walked further into the hall. She wasn’t the only one looking at him, other women were checking him out too. Who could blame them, when he looked so good.
He belongs to me! She wanted to announce to all of them, starting with the girl he had come in with, who was at that very moment hanging on to his arm like a limpet. Ada studied her. This wasn’t the girl from Sheraton, she was a new one, pretty and graceful and elegantly dressed, and for some reason she couldn’t stop smiling up at Eddie. Ada had never felt so jealous.
She watched as he went over with his date to greet Sophie and her husband. She watched jealously as introductions were made and smiles were exchanged. They all talked genially for a few moments. Ada watched until she saw Sophie point Eddie in her direction, he turned to look at her. Their eyes met again and immediately she turned away, pretending to be engrossed in what the artist was saying. She wanted Eddie to come over, but she didn’t want to be introduced to his girlfriend. She watched form the corner of her eye to see if he would come towards her. He didn’t, it was hurtful that he hadn’t even bothered. She made excuses to her companion and made her way to the bathroom to compose herself.
When Ada returned, the girl was still with him. Contrary to Ada’s hopes, she hadn’t disappeared in a puff of smoke.
“Have you seen Eddie?” Sophie had walked over to stand by her. “I know you’ve been looking out for him. You want to speak with him, don’t you?”
“I don’t want to interrupt his date.” Ada replied dourly. “Maybe later.”
“Later when?” Sophie snorted. “Now seems good to me.” She said determinedly. Ada allowed herself to be steered across the room towards Eddie. His companion had wandered off to look at some of the artwork. He was standing alone, in front of one of the pictures he had seen at her apartment, the blind beggar. Blown up, the effect of the picture was much more powerful.
He turned as Sophie and Ada reached him. His eyes searched Ada’s face for a moment, and then he smiled at her. “Hello.” He said.
Just Hello? Ada sighed inwardly. How could he be so reserved?
“Hello.” She replied.
Sophie smiled. “And hello to you both, I am going to find my husband.” With that she turned on her heel and them standing alone together.
Ada couldn’t meet his eyes, so she stared fixedly at his chest. There was so much she wanted to say to him, but where would she even start?
“You’re having a good exhibition.” He observed.
“Yes.” She agreed. “I should thank you for that.”
“Why?” He shrugged. “I didn’t take the pictures.”
“Yes but…” She sighed. “But if you hadn’t told Sophie…” She stopped. She was talking too much. “Thank you.”
He smiled and she drank in the sight of his dimples as they leapt to life in his cheeks. That smile broke her heart in a million tender places. “You are welcome.” He said.
They stood silent for a while. Ada ransacked her head for something to say to him.
“I’ve sold quit a few.” She told him.
He nodded. “I’ve noticed.”
She finally plucked up the courage to look up at him and saw that he was looking over her head, into the hall. She turned to look in the direction his companion had gone, the girl was nowhere to be seen. She turned back to him, hurt by the lack of interest on his face. Was he so bored, or tired of talking to her, that he couldn’t wait to escape?
“Sophie told me that you travelled.”
He nodded. “I did.’
Would they go on like this? Talking about unimportant things until the evening was over?
“I wouldn’t have got the exhibition without you.” She said, then kicked herself mentally for being a broken record.
He smiled. “You’ve already thanked me.” He said wryly. “As I said before, I didn’t take any pictures.”
He was looking over her head again. He was definitely tired of talking to her? His date still hadn’t come back. She swallowed.
“Eddie, I know I said a lot of things, and I’m sorry.” The words burst out of her in a rush “I’m sorry I insulted you, I’m sorry I insulted your family and I’m sorry I punished you for trying to help with my work.”
She stole a look at his face, his expression hadn’t changed. He was looking at her face, but he didn’t say a word, and he didn’t look like he was going to. Desperately, she soldiered on.
“I don’t know why I said the things I said.” She continued. “I don’t know what came over me!”
Her words must have amused him a little because for a moment there was a small smile on his face. “Ada you don’t have to…”
“No.” She protested. “I do.” She sighed. “Forget what I just said, because I do know what came over me. You were right, I was afraid.” She moved closer to him. “I was falling in love with you and I didn’t know how to handle it. I had convinced myself that you were wrong for me, that you weren’t the type of person I should even think of being with, I just…. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to handle it.”
She searched his face for anything, any information to show how he was receiving the things she was saying to him, but there was nothing. His silence was driving her crazy.
She took a deep breath, she had to show him that she meant it. Sophie’s words echoed in her mind. ‘Go for it!’ Well that was exactly what she was going to do. She would get a response out of him any way she could.
He was still looking at her, waiting for her to say something else. So before she could think herself out of it, she moved forward and pulled his face down towards hers.
She kissed him, and it felt wonderful. She didn’t care that they were in a room full of people, or that his date could return any moment, she luxuriated in the feel of his lips as they moved over hers. She had missed those lips. She had missed the smell of his skin, the coolness of his cologne.
He only hesitated for a moment, because almost immediately, his arms were around her and he was kissing her back. Ada exulted in the sensations that filled her body, surely, this meant something, she thought, even as her senses blurred. It meant something that he could kiss her like this, here, in front of all these people.
It only lasted for a few seconds, and then he was pulling away from her, his face set determinedly.
Ada blinked, confused. What was he doing?
He was breathing deeply, but the expression on his face didn’t change. He put his hands on her shoulders to steady her. “You’re sorry.” He said, “That’s okay. I forgive you.”
Ada swallowed, there was a lump in her throat. “But?”
He hesitated for a moment, then he shrugged, “But I’m here with someone.”
Her heart had never felt so heavy. She was going to cry, she couldn’t cry, not here, in front of everybody. She started to say something, but she couldn’t articulate the words in her mind. I thought you wanted me, she screamed silently. Why did you make me fall in love with you? and now you don’t want me anymore?
“I’m sorry.” He added.
Why? Why was he sorry? She was the one who ruined everything. She turned away from him and saw his date coming towards them. She stepped back from him. “You’re right.” She said, forcing her voice to come out steady, “Of course.”
He gave her a small smile. “Congratulations on your success.” He said, before walking away from her, towards his date.