“The physical wounds healed,” she continued. “It’s the emotional ones I’m still dealing with. The reason I pushed you the other night was because that was the first time since that night I had relaxed that way with a man.” She swallowed, worried that maybe she’d revealed too much, was putting pressure on him again. But if she was going to allow him in, share her story, she saw no reason to gloss over uncomfortable truths. “It meant a lot to me.”
His entire body froze. “You haven’t been with a man since your ex?”
“No.”
He worked his head back and forth as he cracked his knuckles. His agitation worried her even more.
“Did he—”
Seeing where his mind had gone, she was quick to relieve him of that thought. “No,” she said the word forcefully. “No. But you know how I was when you met me. I keep walls around me. Have a hard time letting them down.” She studied the man beside her. “For some reason, I am able to with you.”
As he stared at her, agitation started to get the best of her. Tilting her chin, she held his gaze, refusing to shut him out, though she wanted nothing more than to hide behind those walls again. She’d just left herself completely exposed to this man. Had truly let someone new in. She would not regret it. She would embrace this moment, allow herself to be vulnerable without fighting or running away.
“What’s the goal here, Kel—” He shook his head. “I mean, Ella?”
“Kelsey. Until I’m no longer running, until I return home, Kelsey is who I will stay.”
A sad smile she didn’t understand came to his lips. “Is going home what you want?”
“More than anything, because when I do, I’ll have reclaimed my life. Randy will no longer have any control over me.”
A long silence followed her declaration, then he reached for that lock of hair, running it between his fingers. “Then we’re going to reclaim your life, Kelsey.”
…
Lance watched Kelsey aim a dart at a wall covered in balloons and throw. Somehow the arrow missed every single inflatable and lodged in the corkboard backing. She threw back her head as she groaned in good-natured disappointment.
His emotions had been all over the fucking map ever since she’d confided in him, but mostly he felt fury at the motherfucker who’d dared to lay his hands on her, who made her so terrified she’d changed her name to hide from him.
Ella. Her name was Ella, and she let her walls down with him.
The confession had continuously whispered through his mind as the night passed. Over two hours ago, they’d climbed off the Ferris wheel with him having a whole new set of responsibilities toward this woman. For the last week, he’d tried to do right by her, had kept his distance. As he suspected, it hadn’t taken the McNealys long to figure out he’d told Piper the truth, and they’d had a fucking conniption at having their leverage taken from them—though they’d calmed after he shared his idea with them. But the McNealys hated not having the upper hand on anyone who owed them money.
If they learned about his feelings toward Kelsey, they might try to find a way to use her against him. What if they learned the truth about her?
After what she’d shared with him, he was torn over what to do. He had two choices. Continue keeping the distance between them so the cousins would not target her, or enjoy what time they had together.
Kelsey turned toward Gayle and laughed at something the crazy woman said. They’d stayed together as a group all night. And again, he was struck by how well she fit into his life.
But Kelsey’s mission was to reclaim her name and go home. His time with her was limited. That thought decided it.
Lance walked up to her. “Hey, you want to get out of here?”
She glanced around and then pulled him away from the group. “I just want to be clear. My confession on the Ferris wheel wasn’t an attempt to get you to feel sorry for me. I don’t want you to feel cornered now that you know my story.”
While he respected her bluntness, she was way off on his intentions. Reaching out, he ran his knuckles across her cheek. “The moment I saw you tonight, I knew I was fighting a losing battle. It would have ended this way even if you hadn’t shared your past with me.”
Her bottom lip disappeared between her teeth as she stared up at him. Finally, she nodded. “I have to tell Amber. I rode with her.”
“I think she’s going to be relieved you won’t need a ride home.” He pointed to the woman and Rick. The two had gotten cozy with each other ever since they’d been forced to ride together on the Ferris wheel.
“I guess she’s going to get some boy-drama of her own,” Kelsey muttered.
“What?”
“Nothing. Girl talk.”
After Kelsey spoke with Amber, and they said their goodbyes to everyone, they hurried to his Jeep. Once inside, the air between them thickened. There was no doubt where this was headed, and by the way Kelsey fidgeted on the passenger side, she knew it, too.
How did she feel? Kelsey wasn’t a virgin, but her circumstances made this like the first time all over again. He’d never doubted his techniques in the bedroom. But he couldn’t help but worry about doing something that would scare her instead of excite her.