Hard to Be Good

“Really? That’s awesome,” Marz said.

Jeremy glared at his brother and watched as Marz’s smile fell.

“Wait. Why’s that bad?” Marz asked.

“It’s not,” Jeremy finally said.

“So . . . are you guys together?” Nick asked, his tone careful, like he knew where the mines lay in this conversation.

Heaving a deep breath, Jeremy shrugged. “I thought we were.”

The lightbulb went on behind Nick’s eyes, and the sympathy Jeremy saw there felt like all kinds of shit. “Oh. Oh, hell. You overheard . . .”

Jeremy crossed his arms and nodded.

Across the gym, the door opened and a whole group of -people streamed in. Charlie, Becca, Kat, and Beckett carried plates of food. Emilie, Shane, and Sara carried armfuls of bottled water and soda cans. Behind them were Easy, Jenna, Dare, and a few other Ravens.

“Come on over,” Becca called. “Lunch is served.”

Nick rose, came around to Jeremy’s seat, and clapped him on the shoulder. “Just talk to him.” And then he was gone.

“Ditto that,” Marz said as he got up. “Hate seeing two of my favorite -people so unhappy.”

Jeremy nodded. He sat there for a few minutes debating what to do. Nick and Marz were right. They needed to talk. As soon as their shift was over, Jeremy would take Charlie to his room and hash this out once and for all.

Gonna be a long fucking day ’til then, though.

Yeah.

Jeremy got up to see Cy watching him from underneath Marz’s desk. Crouching, Jeremy held out a hand. “Psst, psst. Come here, Cy.”

The cat blinked once, twice, and then took a few cautious steps forward.

“It’s okay,” Jeremy said. “Come on.”

Jeremy wasn’t sure how long he sat there trying to coax the cat to trust him. Cy would take a few steps, then hesitate, then take a few more. But finally, miraculously, Cy was close enough to stretch and sniff his hand.

“See? It’s okay.”

Cy sniffed him again, then rubbed his head against Jeremy’s whole palm, his one good eye closing like it felt so good, like he’d been dying for a pet but had been too scared to let anyone do it.

It had just taken time and patience and a little coaxing.

As Cy rubbed his body against Jeremy’s legs, those words settled into his brain. What if those were all Charlie needed, too? Damnit, he really didn’t want to wait until this evening to clear things up. The tension between them was eating him up inside, and Jeremy hated those flashes of hurt he’d seen on Charlie’s face more than once.

Gently, Jeremy slipped his hands around Cy, testing to see if the cat would allow himself to be picked up. He did. And it made Jeremy grin.

“I got you, kitty dude. Don’t you worry,” Jeremy said, petting the cat’s soft head. At some point, he’d need a bath and a trip to the vet to get checked out, but right now, all he seemed to need was some love.

Slowly, Jeremy rose, the cat tucked against his chest, and turned to find Charlie standing about fifteen feet away.

“You got him to let you pet him,” Charlie said, not quite making eye contact.

“Yeah. His name is Cy, by the way.” Jeremy walked closer to the other man, his gut clenching in regret at the invisible wall that seemed to stand between them.

“Yeah?” A smile flitted across Charlie’s face, then disappeared again.

“Wanna see if he’ll let you touch him, too?” Jeremy asked.

“Oh. I don’t want to scare him,” Charlie said, his voice so flat it was breaking Jeremy’s heart.

Jeremy shrugged. “Don’t worry about that. If you do, we’ll just try again another time. I think he really wants some love, though.”

Charlie slowly closed the distance between them. When he stood right in front of Jeremy, he held out his hand and let Cy sniff it, and then the cat let Charlie get as far as stroking his head a few times.

Raucous laughter erupted over at the table, and the cat exploded out of Jeremy’s arms. Cy was no more than an orange flash as he bolted across the room and into a hiding place.

“See? He totally let you,” Jeremy said.

Charlie lifted his gaze, and his eyes were such an amazing deep blue. “Jeremy?”

“Yeah?”

Emotions Jeremy couldn’t read seemed to flit over Charlie’s expression until he finally frowned and shook his head.

“What is it, Charlie?” Jeremy’s gut tensed and his heart started to sink. Whatever Charlie was working up to say didn’t seemed like it was going to be good. Sonofabitch.

“Just . . . damnit . . .” He tugged at his blond hair and dropped his gaze again.

“Char—-”

“Fuck it,” Charlie said. And then he stepped right up to Jeremy’s body, grasped his face, and kissed him like Jeremy was the air he needed to breathe.





Chapter 11




IT WAS ENTIRELY possible that Charlie was going to have a heart attack. Because he was kissing Jeremy right out in the open, just like he’d always wished he could be brave enough to do.

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