Gabriel’s kisses could be light and sweet, like the kisses given by a boy to his first love. But not at this moment. Now he pressed his lips to hers until her lips parted and gave her a long, heated kiss before retreating. He ran the back of his hand up and down the curve of her cheek.
“I would have chosen jeans, but Hilary, my personal shopper, persuaded me that it’s very difficult to buy jeans for another person. If you’d rather wear something more casual, I’ll take you to buy something else.”
“I don’t need another pair of jeans.”
“You should know that I chose everything except the underwear. Hilary picked them.” He saw surprise on her face and hastened to explain. “I didn’t want to embarrass you.”
“Too late,” she mumbled, somewhat disappointed at his revelation.
“Julianne, I need to explain something.” His eyes grew serious, and she felt a chill of some kind travel across the surface of his skin. He shifted his weight once or twice as he seemed to search for the right words.
“My father was a married man with a family when he became involved with my mother. He seduced her, used her like a whore, and abandoned her. It grieves me that you could think I’m treating you the same way. Of course, given my track record, your reaction is not surprising but—”
“Gabriel, I don’t think that. It’s just that I don’t like feeling as if I need to be looked after.”
He stared at her closely. “I want to look after you but not because you need it. Of course you can look after yourself. You’ve been doing a damn good job of it since you were a little girl. But you don’t have to be alone anymore. You have me now.
“I want to spoil you and make extravagant gestures because I care for you.” He moved uncomfortably. “I can’t say everything I feel. All I can do is show you. So when you won’t let me…” He shrugged, a pained look on his face.
“I never thought of it like that,” she said quietly.
“Every time I do something for you, I’m trying to demonstrate the words I cannot say.” He traced his thumbs across the curve of her cheekbones. “Don’t deprive me of this. Please.”
Julia answered him by raising herself up on tiptoe and pressing herself tightly against his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck and plundering his mouth with her own. It was all hunger and promise and giving and need.
Gabriel gave to her, the tension of his jaw fully palpable as he concentrated his entire being on this one, perfect mouth. When they broke apart, they were both panting.
He rested his chin on her shoulder. “Thank you,” he whispered.
“It’s hard for me to depend on someone else.”
“I know.”
“It would be easier if you included me in your plans, rather than making decisions for me. I’d feel more like your—partner. Not that that’s what we are.” Her cheeks pinked up.
He kissed her again. “I want us to be partners, Julianne. What you ask for is fair. I just get carried away sometimes, especially with you.”
She nodded against his chest, and when he cleared his throat, she pulled back so that she could see his eyes.
“About a year before he died, my father had an attack of conscience and added me to his will. He must have thought that by giving me the same share in his estate as his legitimate children, he could expiate his sins. You’re looking at a living, breathing indulgence.”
“I’m so sorry, Gabriel.”
“I didn’t want the money. But because of the investments he left me, I have more money now than I had when he died. No matter how fast I spend it, I will never be rid of it. I will never be rid of him. So you mustn’t think about how much things cost. The cost is inconsequential.”
“Why did you accept the inheritance?”
He released her so that he could rub his eyes behind his glasses. “Richard and Grace mortgaged their house to pay for my mistakes. I owed money for drugs, which meant that I was in danger, and there were other things…”
“I didn’t know.”
“Your father knew.”
“Dad? How?”
“Richard was determined to save me. When I confessed how much trouble I was in, he decided to go to all of the people I owed money to and pay them off. Fortunately, he called your father first.”
“Why would he do that?”
“Because your father knew a private investigator who had connections in Boston.”
Julia’s eyes widened in recognition. “My uncle Jack.”
Gabriel frowned. “I didn’t know he was your uncle. Richard was so na?ve. He didn’t realize that I owed money to some very shady characters who could have taken the money and killed him. Tom arranged for your uncle and some of his friends to pay my debts, safely, with Richard’s money. When I got out of rehab, I called my father’s lawyer in New York and said I’d take my inheritance. I paid off the mortgage, but I never lost the shame. Richard could have been killed because of me.”
Julia pressed her cheek to his chest. “You are his son. Of course he wanted to save you. He loves you.”