We were at lunch one day in middle school. I’d never really had a crush on anyone before, but I’d stupidly confided in my so-called best friend that I thought Corry Spencer and Billy Greenwood were cute. Em in her infinite wisdom had told Billy that I liked him, and what happened next defined what has until recently become my high school career when it comes to interacting with others.
Em noticed Billy making his way over to our lunch table first and kicked my leg, nodding in his direction. I looked up, and his eyes were zeroed in on me. He waved and I looked around, certain he was making his way over to someone else, but no, the salutation was for me. Before I could stop myself I gave one of those awkward finger wiggle waves that you see all the airheads do in movies. He straddled the bench right next to me, never shifting his gaze, and I could feel myself turning beet red. Em jabbed me in the back, prompting me to say hello, and I was greeted by a huge toothy sparkling white grin. Seriously, this kid could have done toothpaste commercials. I almost expected a little light to flash in his teeth and make a ping sound.
He didn’t say anything right away, and it threw me. I picked up my Coke to busy myself, to avoid sitting and staring at him like a moron. He leaned in close, too close as it turned out, and asked if I wanted to go to the movies with him. His timing sucked, or maybe it was mine, because I’d just taken a huge gulp of soda. He took me by complete surprise, and I think I gasped but that’s a lot harder than it sounds with your mouth full. The drink hit the back of my throat and I immediately choked. I threw my hand over my mouth to do damage control, but the soda needed out. It sprayed through my nose and the fizzy burn it caused made me open my mouth, which my fingers did a poor job of guarding. Coke spilled out all over me. If anyone around us thought he looked horrified at it, they hadn’t seen anything yet. I coughed and spluttered, gasping for air while trying to say sorry. I remember thinking ‘thank god it didn’t spray him’.
Em began slapping my back to try and help me—at least that’s what she told me later—and it thrust me forward abruptly. That’s when it happened. It was like time slowed down, and everyone turned to see what the commotion was right as my retainer propelled from my mouth in a trajectory set for Billy Greenwood’s lap. I watched in utter disbelief as it landed in his crotch, covered in my saliva and Coke. He fished it up on instinct, then his face pinched and contorted as he realized what he was holding. The whole table began laughing as he dropped it like it was infected with Anthrax, and it landed in someone’s Cesar salad. He stood up and told me that he’d just remembered he couldn’t take me to the movies because he forgot about an assignment that he had to hand in and then bolted from the cafeteria. Em was trying to console me while also trying to calm her own hysterics. The whole incident pretty much put me off talking to anyone at school for months. After that I did my best to blend into the background.
I can still see her in my mind’s eye, trying not to laugh, and it warms my heart and then breaks it a little.
I miss her.
I round the corner to see a semicircle of girls gathered around where Ethan’s waiting at my locker. Casey and Brie stand on either side of him, like super tiny pissed off bodyguards; the girls are all clamoring for his attention and offering up condolences about his dad. They’re not doing anything wrong but Brie looks like she’s about to cut someone when a girl with long red hair leans in and whispers something into Ethan’s ear. His face pales and then he notices me, noticing him. His expression flashes from relief to alarm at seeing me in less than a second. My step falters and then the redhead turns and my stomach flips. I paste on a fake ass grin and carry on with my approach. Della looks like a cat with the cream as she watches me approach. She flips her hair and turns to say something to the girl beside her before they both look over at me and then let out a laugh. Ethan pushes past her and she teeters on her high heels and stumbles against her friend as he moves her out of his path. He emerges through the small crowd and picks me up mid-stride, twirling me around before placing a kiss on my nose and popping me back on the ground. I’m in no doubt that this is his attempt at quashing the rumors Della has been working hard to circulate in our absence. But I love him for it.
“Morning, Princess. You’re a sight for sore eyes.”