“Remember that day in the museum?” I nod. “Well I was looking at a picture of you and Mason and a teacher said I looked just like you and then I saw you in the bathroom and when I said my mom’s name you looked at me kinda funny. So I just guessed it.”
“You didn’t want to say something?” I ask.
“I didn’t know if you liked me or if you wanted to be my dad.”
Looking at my son with tears in my eyes I see me at this age. I reach out, cupping his face with my hand. “Hell yes I want to be your dad. My god, Noah, since the day I saw you, I’ve been bugging your mom about meeting you.”
“Was I an accident like Junior Appleton?”
“No,” I answer before Josie can say anything. Her eyes go wide. “Your mom and I talked about having kids all the time. I was going to marry her, buy her a nice fancy house and we were going to have a family.”
Noah looks at Josie who nods in agreement. When he looks back at me, his eyes are like daggers. “What happened?”
“I went to college and some things changed. Instead of taking your mom with me, I left everyone I knew behind and went to California to try something different. I didn’t know about you until I met you the other day. Your mom,” I look up at Josie and smile. “She loves you and she tried to find me, so don’t be angry at her okay?”
“Okay.”
“Remember when I said I had to go back to work. I’m going to stay for this week’s game, then head back. But I’ll be back and you can call me anytime you want to talk or have a question about football.”
“Can I tell people you’re my dad?”
I look to Josie for approval. She shrugs her shoulders. I think that Beaumont is far enough off the beaten path that paparazzi won’t bug him, but I’m not sure. I also don’t want him to feel like he has to hide me.
“You can, but listen, buddy. There are people who like to take my picture and think they can get close to me through my friends. If anyone gives you a hard time or starts following you around, you just call me and I’ll take care of everything, okay?”
“And we need to tell Nick,” Josie says as she runs her hand through Noah’s hair. I thought she had which would explain why he was so angry yesterday. I know I shouldn’t care, but he’s been raising my son. I should respect his feelings.
“Listen to me, Noah. I want you to listen to Nick and treat him the same because he’s your dad too. You are going to be one of those special boys that have an amazing set of parents.”
The timer on the stove goes off and Noah breathes a sigh of relief before announcing that he’s starving to death. Josie jumps up and hurries into the kitchen, leaving Noah and I sitting at the table.
“Do you love my mom?”
“Yes,” I reply without hesitation.
“Like really, really looooove her?”
“Where do you learn this stuff?” I don’t remember knowing what love was at nine years old. My only focus was football and how far I could throw the ball. Girls weren’t even on my radar at this age.
“School.”
“What else do they teach you in school these days?”
Noah shrugs. “Do you love her like you did before?”
“Yes,” I say again because it’s the truth. I never stopped loving her and absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder. I’ve been in love with Josephine Preston since I can remember and now I’m too late. “But it doesn’t change things. Your mom has moved on and is going to marry Nick. You and I, though, you’re going to be my sidekick.”
“Can I go on tour with you?”
Josie enters just as Noah asks. I’m not sure how to answer but I’m sure as hell not telling him no. Josie is watching me out of the corner of her eye, waiting for me to screw this up. She sets plates in front of us and takes a seat across from Noah.
“Maybe,” I say as I pick up my fork. “It will depend on where I’m going and if it’s during the summer. You can’t miss school and you don’t want to miss football. Do you play any other sports?” I dig into my dinner and hum when the savory chicken hits my taste buds. I haven’t had a home cooked meal in a long time. Even the food at Katelyn’s was just party food. This is a real dinner.
“I play baseball because Nick likes it, but I want to learn the guitar.”
“I’ll teach you.”
“You will? Awesome!”
Dinner conversation flows fairly well. We talk about his teacher and his homework. He tells us that he has a crush on a girl at school but doesn’t want to give us her name. Josie and Noah ask about Los Angeles and what it’s like. I tell them there are a lot of people, the traffic is horrible so I hate leaving my place and that it can be really hot. But we have Disneyland and nice beaches and the Hollywood sign.
Noah asks what my cat’s name is and I’m ashamed to admit I never named it. Noah says that’s why it hates me and he’s probably right.