I nodded, and he headed out to the porch.
There was indeed a bathroom back there with a massive walk-in shower lined with white subway tiles and multiple showerheads. I reached in and turned it on, letting the water heat and wandered over to the mirror above one of the marble topped vanities. I was flushed from the sun and my hair, as I pulled it out of a messy bun, was a kinky mess. When Jack told me I was beautiful, I believed him. Fully. I felt beautiful when he looked at me.
His mention of us showering conjured all sorts of images, and while he probably meant we should shower one after the other, all I could think about after our outdoor shower was us in there together.
We had this one amazing night here, away from prying eyes and judgments. I had no idea what our relationship would look like going forward, but we had this moment. Seven long months I’d spent missing him and wanting him and fantasizing about various scenarios. And some had been sexual, there was no point denying it to myself.
I took a deep breath. “Jack?”
He came in, carrying a black toiletries bag and dumped it on the counter. “Yeah?”
“I, I was thinking …” Gah. My throat was so thick with nerves, I sounded like I needed speech therapy. And my cheeks were hot. My eyes flicked over to the shower involuntarily.
Jack followed my look then looked back at me. And I saw the thought cross his mind, his eyes narrowing, his nostrils flaring slightly. His Adams apple bobbed roughly as he swallowed. “What were you thinking?” he said roughly.
My shaking fingers found the buttons of my shorts, and I popped them open, and then shimmied them down my thighs until they dropped. I stepped out of them and toed off my shoes.
Jack’s eyes tracked down my legs then back to my hands, waiting to see what they would do next, I guess. The steam from the warm shower filled the room.
I reached for my t-shirt and pulled it off and stood in my bikini. “I was thinking, you did such a good job of washing me in the shower before, you, you could do it again?”
Jack’s mouth closed in a tight line, and his hand gripped the counter, white knuckled.
“Get undressed, Jack,” I said softly and reached for my bikini tie at my neck.
“Stop,” he said harshly.
I froze.
He let go of the counter, and reaching behind him, pulled his t-shirt over his head. “I want to do that.”
Gulping, I obeyed.
“Get in the shower,” he rasped, his eyes intense.
The hunch that I’d released some kind of animal in Jack was strong. And rather than trepidation, it sent a rush of hot want through every single part of me. I nodded with a small smile as I entered the shower. Stepping under the warm spray, I turned to watch the vague outline of Jack through the foggy glass as he took off his shoes and shorts. Despite the moist humidity and the water streaming over me, my mouth went dry at the sight of Jack stepping into the shower completely naked and aroused.
Wow.
The sight of his muscled form with the hideous tattoo, beautiful but ugly for its significance, caused my nerves to ratchet up. My eyes traveled back up to where he was watching me intently, his green eyes boring into mine.
A small crease between his brows let me know he was also nervous. Maybe he was nervous this was all a big tease, or that he might step over some kind of line and go too far with me. I didn’t know.
Picking up my sopping hair to expose the knot of my swimsuit, I turned and presented my back to him. “Can you take this off me now please?”
His fingers touched my neck and spine. The top gaped forward and I pulled it off, letting it smack the floor of the shower. He stepped in close, his arousal hard at my back.
… Causing an involuntary shudder to run through me …
His hands slid around my belly, and after a brief hesitation, up and lightly over my breasts.
I clenched my teeth at the shock of sensation.
Holy shit.
I let my head fall back.
Reactions cascaded one after the other, a relief of having his hands on me. It wasn’t nearly enough. How did I let him know how much I wanted him?
Sometimes the look in his eyes was completely at odds with his slow and gentle touches.
I wanted him to lose control. I wanted to see Jack at his most primal. I wanted to be the object of his lust. Of his love, not his pain or revenge.
Hearing his breath in my ear, I came to a decision.
I grabbed the miniature shower gel bottle and poured some in my hand and moved away, sliding around behind Jack in the shower. Exchanging places.
Lathering up the soap, I slid the suds over his muscled back, massaging my hands over the slick and tense terrain, and up into his hair, using my nails to scrape lightly over his scalp.