“What are you talking about? I had sushi, I’m sitting in my jetted tub, I’ve got a bottle of wine over there waiting for me, and I took a nap. If that’s not self care, I don’t know what is.”
“Tori, I’m not talking about one day. You barely sleep, your diet lately has been five red bulls a day and sushi for lunch, and you’re not getting any booty. You’re all concerned about your clients, but I bet they’re sleeping great after the great sex they have after their great dates, thanks to you. You do an amazing job with everybody else, you give it your all, and then you expect the leftovers to be able to sustain you. When are you going to start keeping some of the good stuff back for yourself before you burn out? ”
I groaned, laying my head back against the tile. “Mel… I said I was fine, can you drop it please?”
“Fine. I’m just saying, you need to think about how you’re a matchmaker, but can’t get your shit together in your own life.”
“Ok, little miss psychology degree, thanks for the diagnosis, but you’re ruining my vibe. Can you close the door on your way out?” I snapped, closing my eyes, again. Accurate or not, I didn’t feel like listening to her analyze me. She didn’t say anything else, so I knew I had upset her, especially when I heard the rustling of her clothes as she actually stood to leave. “Mel,” I called out, turning to her before she got out of the door. “I’m sorry for snapping at you, it’s just… not a good time right now.”
She turned to me with a heavy sigh. “Tee, you don’t have to apologize to me for having a bad day… its okay. I may have gone a little harder than I intended, but I just hate seeing you like this. Do what you need to do to feel better… not just for today. You haven’t been yourself for a while… I miss you.” With a last smile, she closed the door behind her, leaving me alone in the steamy bathroom. I tried for a few minutes to get back into a relaxed state of mind, but after the things Melanie brought up, it was impossible.
I drained the tub, and wrapped myself in my bathrobe before I climbed into bed. I laughed when I glanced at the clock and saw that at 9 o’clock on a Friday night, I was getting ready to go to sleep. But seriously, what else could I do? One friend was pregnant and married, living in another state, and the other lived halfway across the country. It wasn’t as if I could call them up to hit the town with me. My sister was fun, but she was also 23. I didn’t have the energy to kick it with her. My parents— God, how pitiful was it that I was thinking of my parents for Friday night entertainment? — were surely getting ready for bed themselves. So that’s where I was. Going to bed at the same time as my parents.
Way to go, Tori.
In the semi-darkness of the room, I noticed the flashing light on my tablet indicating I had new notifications. I retrieved it from the bedside table and turned on the screen, groaning when I saw it was a notification from the Matched site. I rolled my eyes when I saw it was from Avery. This early in the night, I knew it meant yet another date that had been a bust, and I wondered what the reason would be this time. I’d been sending Avery on dates for a few weeks at this point, and after meeting six different women, we were still no closer to finding him a match. The last few had been better than the first ones, but he still claimed none of the women ‘felt’ right.
Truthfully… I agreed. I hadn’t gotten that gut feeling any of the women who were compatible with Avery on the screen would actually work for him in real life. This was new territory for me, and frankly, I was floundering. It crossed my mind multiple times a day that maybe none of the women felt like good matches for Avery because I wanted him for myself, but that was crazy. Avery was sexy, charming, smart, helpful, and now that he was making an effort to switch up his bed-hopping ways, he was potentially a great catch… just not for me. Maybe in another lifetime, we could have… no, there was no reason to think about that. I pushed my imagination into a corner, and read the message from Avery.