Finally Found

They pulled up in front of a narrow building. It was scarcely wider than the double door and skinny sidelight window. Adam gawked at it. “Holy hell! That is one tiny building.” He glanced around, trying to see what the rest of the crowded street looked like. “And where do you live?”

“That would be…the third floor of Holy Hell.” She smirked at him.

He wanted to stab himself in the thigh with a really dull fork…like the kind they had in the boarding school he spent two years at before being expelled. Those forks could barely stick the steak. And those knives…glorified butter knives. He shook his head. Honestly, he should stick to non-verbal communication. He smiled. In the past, that would have meant taking her to bed. With all he had said wrong this night, he wouldn’t even be permitted to undress her with his eyes. He sighed.

“Should I wait in the car? Is there even room for both of us in there?” He smirked to show he was joking.

“This is the part of the evening wherein I give you a tour of how the other half lives. Drag your ass.” She rolled her eyes and sighed as she stepped from the vehicle. “Oh, and you have to lift up on the door to shut it. The latch mechanism is a bit tricky.” He could see she was trying not to laugh at him as he struggled with the door.

After a few more unsuccessful tries, she sighed loudly and walked over to him. “Move,” she urged. Once he was out of the way, she grabbed the door handle, lifted it and the door, then directing it with her foot, managed to expertly shut it on the very first try. “There.” She smiled and led the way inside the building.

“You might have mentioned the foot trick. I bet if I had used the foot trick…” But before he could complete his sentence, they had walked up the narrow dimly lit staircase and had stopped in front of her door. At least he assumed it was her door, since she was using a key in the lock.

“So, here’s what’s going to happen,” she said. “I’m going to walk in after you. You should go straight, duck under the loft, sit on the couch and wait for me. I’ll hike up the loft, change, and come back down. Then I’ll take you anywhere you want to go because I’ll be so happy to get out of these shoes and that bustier that you can all but have your way with me.” She was practically giddy as she peeled off her shoes in the hall.

“Does that mean I still have a chance at getting my birthday wish?” He wore his most seductive grin.

“Why do you always have to do that?” She sighed loudly. “Can’t we just be playful and have fun without you trying to turn everything into sex? Have you not had enough meaningless sex in your life?” She gestured with her head. “Go on. I’m waiting.” It was getting late and her impatience was showing.

Sitting quietly under the loft, Adam wondered over everything she had said. It was true. There was more than a grain of truth to it. Hadn’t their discussion earlier in the evening proven that point? And yet some habits were simply so hard to break. He frowned. Some day, he wanted something real, just like Sam and Haley. He wanted someone that he could be himself with, who would love him no matter what. He wanted someone who was safe to love.

Too soon, she came down the ladder. She was wearing worn jeans and a fitted v-neck long sleeved shirt. It was plum colored and a white tank top was peeking out underneath. She had on fuzzy socks and slid her feet into some black boots that she pulled out of a cupboard near the door. And her hair, for the first time that night, was loose and flowed past her shoulders in waves of honey blonde and gold. Then she did it again…that thing where she looked up at him through her long lashes. For a moment, his breath caught in his throat and he had to wonder once more how he had never noticed her. She knew him, but had he really been that superficial that he had never paid attention to her because she was the help? He shook his head, disgusted with the man he used to be and determined to be better.

“Did you decide where you want to go?” She asked while grabbing a black leather jacket from behind a sheet that doubled as a closet door. He knew his mouth was hanging open. That was why she had reacted as she did. She chuckled. “The other half, remember?”

“You mean to tell me that the other half doesn’t have closet doors? The other half doesn’t have bedrooms? The other half lives in an apartment so narrow that I can literally touch the opposing walls?” He stood and spread his arms to demonstrate. “Do you even have a bathroom in here, or is this some crazy communal situation that they try to pass off as eco friendly and European?”

She gave him a look that suggested he was the one being ridiculous. “Of course, even the poor have to bathe and pee.” She shrugged. “Let’s go.”

They headed out the door. She locked it while he looked on. “Believe it or not, even I have stuff people would want to steal.” She sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Did I say anything?” He felt attacked.

“Sorry, I have a tendency to be a bit defensive, I guess. It’s a learned behavior.” She skipped down the last few steps and headed out the front door. “I learned it from working around people like you…”

Adam had no idea how to respond to all that. It was strange. He hadn’t even known Cammie more than a few hours. In that brief time they had been at each other like cats and dogs. They seemed to mix about as well as oil and water. Yet he couldn’t help but want to spend more and more time with her. While she seemed remarkably open, he still sensed that there were so many mysteries that he needed to unravel.

“You know, you are way too young to be so bitter,” he remarked with a smirk as they sat in the car and hooked their seat belts.

“Yes.” She said simply. Then she started the car and placed her hands on the wheel. She stared straight ahead.

“What are we waiting for?” He asked.

“I still have no idea where I’m going.” She leaned over the steering wheel for a moment as she stretched her back. “So, Jeeves, where to?”

He couldn’t help but smile at her. She was so stinking cute, such a ball of contradictions, so tough and yet so delicate. She was never at a loss for words, but could render him speechless in an instant. She was…fascinating.

Cammie’s eyes shut for a moment. Once again, he was drawn to her long thick lashes. She had the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen. He found himself imagining what it would be like to feel those lashes brush against his cheek as he crushed her against him. And it occurred to him for the briefest of moments that she might be too tired to drive him. Part of him wanted to end this fiasco, give up, give in, and go home rather than inconvenience her. And the other part of him wanted her around for a while. He needed a new toy. He could make it worth her while. When he tired of her he wouldn’t simply discard her like he had the girls of the past. No, he was changing. When he discarded Cammie, he would leave her better off than he had found her. And she would even thank him.

“What if I just give you directions as we go? That might be easier.” And he gave her a warm smile, confident once more that he was doing the right thing.

She gave him a sideways glance. “Really? See, now you have me wondering. You have me thinking that maybe I’m going to be driving so far that for me to hear the destination in advance would have me kicking you out of my car. Are we leaving the state?”

“No,” he said honestly while he shook his head emphatically. Cammie was not a stupid woman. It wasn’t that he thought he could put anything over on her. It was that he wanted to get her far enough away that she would feel committed and not back out on him. It was a bit of trickery, for sure, but after she saw the house and he invited her to stay, she was bound to forgive him. Every woman he had ever brought here previously had never wanted to leave. Hell, they had been the ones coming up with contrived reasons to stay…couldn’t find an incredibly important item, no way to get into the home/apartment they had left, vehicle wouldn’t start. Ah, but his favorite was the woman who faked a panic attack and her doctor instructed him to keep her in a soothing environment since she was at risk for a deep depression. Funny how no women were hermits or suffered from agoraphobia before visiting, but after…they always did.

So, he didn’t feel guilty in the least. She’d get over it. Soon. Just as soon as he…drew her a bath, complete with wine…and fresh fruit. He continued to formulate a plan as he directed her out of town.

They had driven just a few blocks when she flipped her head around to face him. “Oh. My. God.” She growled at him.

“What?!” He asked, bewildered.

“We’re going to your family home in the Hamptons!” She shook her head and continued to drive.

He was quiet for a moment. Frowning, he realized that she was accelerating. A lot. He knew where all the speed traps were. And it was a Saturday night. There could even be DWI check points to go through. They were doomed.

“Are you trying to get us killed, or do you just want a ticket?” He shifted in his seat so that he could see her reaction.

“What?” She looked down at the speedometer. “Crap.” She let off the gas pedal.

“Dare I hope you are simply excited to see the place?” He smirked.

“You smirk a lot. You are pretty pleased with yourself most of the time, aren’t you?” She scowled.

“You look miserable most of the time. Are you really that unhappy?” He countered. He raised his eyebrows as they spoke.

“You first!” She appeared to be completely exasperated.

“Doll, you need to learn to relax.” He shook his head. Without thinking he reached over and started rubbing her shoulder. And it appeared to work for a moment, her shoulder sank, her head tilted to the side to allow him greater access. And then…she stiffened and shook his hand off.

“Stop,” she said simply, quietly. “Just stop.” She sighed. “I’ll be more relaxed if you aren’t touching me.”

Jerking his hand further away, his mind raced. Had Cammie been raped, too? Was that why she was so tough and didn’t want him touching her?

She glanced at him. Clearly she planned to give him an explanation. “I’ve seen all your moves, player. I’m not one of your trophy dates. I won’t be treated like that. Not by you or anyone else.” She watched him for a reaction. “Do you get it?”

And he realized he had been holding his breath. Slowly, he exhaled. “Yeah. I get it.” He wasn’t battling memories from a painful past. He was battling her memories of his past. He wasn’t sure which was worse.