Crouching down, he shuffled a few bottles around. “Got it!” His hands full, he joined the guys on the back deck as Kyle lit the barbecue. Setting everything down on the nearby table, he took the beer that Monty held out. Twisting the cap off, he joined the circle as they saluted him with their bottles and wished him a happy birthday.
Ryan nodded as he stared at the ground. He didn’t want them to see his eyes burning because his best friend wasn’t there. It felt wrong getting older without Jake aging alongside him. Jake would never grow old, he would never have another birthday, he would simply stay twenty-seven forever. It made his stomach churn. Would the ache ever get easier to live with?
“Jesus,” Kyle breathed.
His head snapped up and followed Kyle’s line of sight to the group of girls inside. Fin’s dress was hiked up, her panties pushed down the side of her hip slightly as the girls crowded around for a closer look at the tattoo.
“Fuck me,” he heard Monty breathe beside him.
Ryan rapped on the glass French doors with his bottle of beer, and they all looked up.
Kyle cleared his throat. “Well. That’s one hell of a birthday present, Kendall,” he said, the girls laughing while Fin snapped her clothes back into place.
Ryan raised a brow. “And that’s as close as you’ll ever get to it, yeah?”
“Stand down, Kendall,” he replied with a grin. “I love you both like family.”
“Shut up, asshole, and check if the grill is hot enough yet.”
Kyle returned to the barbecue. With his beer in one hand, he used the other to scrape the stainless steel spatula over the hotplate.
“Have you told Fin yet?” Monty asked.
His chest tightened. “Not yet.”
Kyle looked over his shoulder at him, grief flashing briefly across his face. “You better do it soon. The next four weeks are gonna fly.”
Ryan looked through the doors again at Fin. He hadn’t seen her this happy since … he couldn’t remember. “Soon,” he muttered.
“I need to ice this cake, girls,” he heard her call out as she stood. He frowned when she paused, her eyes going vacant for a moment.
“Fin?” Rachael called out.
She turned to look at Rachael, a distant smile on her face as she said something and waved her hand in casual dismissal.
Had she eaten anything at all today? Was not eating her way of controlling her grief? Maybe he needed to ask someone.
“Back in a minute,” he said and walked inside to where she was now standing in the kitchen, bowl in hand.
“Have you got some sort of inbuilt frosting beacon?” she teased.
His brows drew together. “You okay?”
Fin paused, the spatula hovering over the cake. “Of course.” She looked at him, her eyes wide. “Why?”
Ryan took a deep breath. “No reason.”
She dipped her finger into the frosting and held it out to him, her eyes closing when he leaned forward and licked it off.
He swallowed the sticky, sweet sugar, getting hard as he imagined licking it off her entire body. “Can we send everyone home yet?”
Fin laughed, the sound husky on her lips, and he grabbed her hips, yanking her towards him. “Soon.”
“Good,” he breathed against her mouth before he kissed her long and slow.
Fin turned the key in the ignition and Ryan’s car came to life with a deep, throaty growl. Pleasure shot through her body, fizzing her blood with excitement at the sound. Putting her hands on the steering wheel, she looked at Ryan, grinning as he opened the passenger door.
Ducking his head, he met her eyes. “I can’t believe I’m letting you do this.”
“It’s only a fifteen minute drive to Mum and Dad’s place,” Fin pointed out.
There was no way he was getting out of letting her drive this car. For a brief moment of joy, she was going to ignore the gas guzzling pollution and feel the brute force of Ryan’s car move beneath her touch. She rolled down the window, knowing the feel of the wind blowing carelessly through her hair would only heighten the experience. Fin returned her hands to their tight grip on the steering wheel and a light sweat of anticipation broke over her palms.
“You’re sure about me driving your car, right?” She didn’t know why she asked that. It didn’t matter because she was driving this car whether he was sure or not.
Ryan shook his head as he slid inside the car. “No. I’m not sure at all. I’m only letting you drive it on one condition.”
Her fingers tapped impatiently as she watched him shut his door. “This is the first time I’ve heard anything about a condition being attached. What is it?”
He grinned at her. “I’m not saying what it is. You just have to agree to it, and when I do eventually tell you, you’re not allowed to say no.”
“Alright,” she replied, knowing she’d agree to almost anything in that moment just to drive his car.