Jake reached over and shoved his shoulder, laughing when Ryan flew back into the grass. “Maybe in your own mind, asshole. Now give me the knife. I want to go first.”
With a shrug, Ryan sat up, brushing grass from his hair as he handed it over. He watched Jake fist the sharp paring knife in his left hand and slice deeply into the thick flesh of his right palm.
“Fuck, Jake. I don’t think it’s supposed to be that deep.”
He grinned at Ryan as blood dripped down his palm. “No pain, no gain. Your turn.”
Jake handed over the knife and Ryan took it. A sharp searing burn rolled through his stomach as it cut through his skin. Dropping the knife to the ground, Ryan looked up, his dark eyes locking on Jake’s green ones, and held out his hand. “Brothers until the end.”
Jake took hold, his grip firm, and squeezed Ryan’s hand hard enough for a trickle of blood to travel the length of his forearm. “There is no end. Brothers forever.”
“Brothers forever,” Ryan said out loud. Despite his heart aching, he smiled at the memory and went back to the letter.
Don’t ever forget those words.
I love you, brother.
Jake.
“Jake, you saved my life,” he muttered gruffly. Where would Ryan have been without Jake in his life? Jake had given him a past filled with happy memories and a reason to keep breathing. “You saved my life and you didn’t even know it.”
“How did he do that?”
Ryan jolted at the sound of Fin’s voice from behind him. He twisted around, shielding his eyes in the sun as he looked up at her. She was wearing a thin, yellow dress with tiny straps that were slipping off her bony shoulders. A pair of brown sandals dangled from her right hand as she focused her eyes on the letter clutched in his fingers.
“I love the two of you. I just want you both happy, you know what I’m saying, don’t you?”
“He gave me you,” Ryan said softly. He folded the letter carefully and returned it to the envelope, trying not to notice how his hands shook slightly with the action.
“You’ve always had me,” she said simply as he tucked it into his back pocket.
“Come here,” he told her, patting the rock surface between his legs.
Fin walked gingerly over to the rocks and settled herself between his legs. He urged her back until she relaxed against his chest, her forearms resting on his thighs.
“How did you know I was here?”
Fin’s head fell back, resting in the crook of his neck. “Rach rang. She saw your car and thought we were at the beach. I came down because I was worried about you,” she admitted.
“I’m okay.”
“Then why are you sitting here alone?”
Ryan tilted his head and pressed a kiss against her temple. “Because I went to see my parents today.”
“Oh, Ryan.” Her fingers dug into his legs. “Tell me?”
“My sister died when I was seven,” Ryan told her, tired of keeping it to himself. For too long the loss had weighed him down.
“What?” she breathed. She tried to turn, but he locked his arms around her so she couldn’t move.
“Just … let me get this out.”
She nodded mutely against him.
“There were only two years between us, but she annoyed the crap out of me. She’d take my toys and draw on them in bright coloured texta and it wouldn’t come off. Everything of mine she touched, she would break. Not purposely. She was just careless and clumsy. She was so much like you, Fin, with her big eyes and sweet smile. She would have been your age now, but she didn’t make it past five years old.”
“It sounds like she spent a lot of time trying to get your attention. She looked up to you, just like I do, Ryan.”
“She did look up to me,” Ryan whispered thickly. “It’s so easy to see that now.”
“What was her name?”
“Kassidy.”
“Kassidy Kendall,” Fin repeated.
His sister’s name sounded so beautiful coming from Fin’s lips, as though it somehow brought Kass back to life.
“What happened to her?”
He closed his eyes and told her.
“Mum!” he yelled loudly, grabbing the football as he flew out the front door. “Going outside to kick the footy around.”
“Don’t go far,” she called out from the kitchen. “Dinner won’t be long!”
“Can I come too, Ryan?” Kassidy hollered.
“No, Kass. You can’t catch properly. You’re all thumbs.”
“Mum!” Kassidy wailed. “Ryan won’t let me play.”
“Ryan,” she replied, the warning evident in her tone. “Let your sister join in or you can go straight to your room.”
“Fine!” he shouted angrily.
Seconds later Kassidy came flying out the front door with a big grin on her face.
“Keep an eye on her, Ryan,” his mum yelled.
Ryan kicked the ball hard and laughed when she fumbled and it dropped to the ground. “Good catch.”
Kassidy pursed her lips and grabbing the ball, she kicked it back hard and Ryan’s mouth fell open. “Hey, that wasn’t a bad kick.” Instead of ditching her like he planned, Ryan returned the ball back to her, more gently this time. “Let’s see you do that again.”
Kassidy did it again, and again.
“Wait!” Ryan told her when she went to kick it back. “Let’s see who can kick it the farthest.”