“Morning sunshine, how you feeling today?” “Better, more grounded. Come on in, Dad’s in front of the TV. Go keep him company, please. I’ll get breakfast.”
I watch her walk half-dazed to the kitchen, she’s so not a morning person, but cute as hell. I can’t wait until she wakes up in my arms every day. My Laney...please God, don’t let anyone take her. If you give me this, I swear to wake her every morning with ‘good morning, beautiful’ and kiss her to sleep every night. I’ll keep her safe and hold her tight. I’ll take care of her, I swear it.
“Hey, Mr. Walker, how are you?”
“There he is; how are you, son?” He stands and gives me a hug; he calls me son. Dane doesn’t even know him. He has no idea what lure he throws for top water or his favorite NFL team. Too bad Laney’s dad doesn’t get the deciding vote. I’d win that shit hands down.
“I’m good, glad to be home.” I give him the most sincere smile I can despite the sadness inside me. My angel is slipping away. I never thought I’d see the day. Another man’s lips have touched hers. He’d shown her Disney World, like only her biggest dream come true. I’ve probably already lost and the thought causes a very real crushing feeling in my chest.
He asks me about school and ball. I concentrate to keep up my end of the conversation, telling him we’re 2-0 in conference play. That news makes him smile and scrub my head.
Laney walks in with a breakfast tray for her dad. “You want something, Ev?”
“No thanks, lil bit, I already ate at home. Your Dad and I were just talking about school.”
She looks over to me and holds my stare. Can she feel it? Does she know that I’ll do anything for her? “Are you happy there, Evan?” she asks.
She wants me to say yes so that she knows I’m fine without her. No matter what, Laney would never simply disregard my feelings, but I don’t want to be her pity pick. I want her to want me, like the way she did before I left her. I left her. This is all my fault.
“I’d be happier if you were there.” I give a simple answer for the sake of her dad and pat the seat beside me for her to sit.
The rest of the late morning is spent watching TV and visiting with her dad and by the time we’ve finished lunch I still haven’t found any time to talk to Laney alone. We’ve both got to get back on the road soon, and before I know it, I’m loading her bag for her.
She meets me on the porch on my way back in. “Evan, what do we do, ya know, about...us?” She looks anywhere but at me and I see the tears in her eyes, about to fall. “Please tell me you know, Evan, because I don’t have a clue. I don’t know anything anymore.”
“Look at me, Laneybear.” I tilt her chin up and wipe her cheek with my thumb. “Everything is gonna be alright. You don’t worry about me. I’m not going anywhere. I love you, Laney Jo, and I’m always going to love you. We’re always gonna be okay, no matter what, so you don’t worry.” I kiss her on the forehead, breathing in the sweet smell of her. “If there’s nothing else in the whole world you know for sure, know that you are always the most important thing in the world to me. Just take care of you, Laney. I’ll take care of everything else.”
I don’t press her about the Dane thing right now, leading us to her truck. I don’t want to stress her out anymore, she’s got to be able to drive and right now she looks like she may crumble any minute. Besides, I’ll take care of that little inconvenience soon enough. I just hope I’m not underestimating him until I can get things in place.
As stoic as possible, I open the door and lift her in by the hips. No matter how badly I want to dig my fingers in, throw her against the door, and kiss her until she can’t breathe, I hold it together. Giving her a smile, despite the ache in my chest seeing her watery eyes, I lean in her window and place a gentle kiss on her lips. Her brows furrow and she shifts, unnoticeable if I didn’t know her like the back of my hand. “It’ll all be okay soon, Laney, I promise.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
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TIT FOR TAT
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Laney
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There was a time, not too long ago even, where I automatically assumed the worst about people. I didn’t let just anyone in; and no one in easily. I very seldom gave new people a chance. College kinda takes that option away from you; dorms, classes, projects, sports— detachment poses a challenge and Thank God for that! My crew is a blessing; I’d be lost without them. It’s surreal how easily we all “fit” and how natural it feels when we’re all in a room together. They’re my crutch these days, so pizza night is a must.