Damp from sweat, I found it a small kind of relief when Cole bunched my hair in his hand and lifted it off my neck so he could kiss me there. Since our return from Joss and Braden’s and our reconciliation/engagement, we’d gone at each other like lust-starved teenagers. First he pinned me against the wall of his hallway; then he carried me to his bed, where we’d screwed each other’s brains out.
Finally our urgency eased as we silently reassured each other. We’d made love slowly, leisurely, and somehow it was the most erotic part of the whole evening.
Cole shifted as if to pull out of me and I put my hand on his hip to stop him. “Stay,” I whispered.
“Inside you?”
I nodded, grabbing his arm and tugging it around my waist.
Catching on, Cole took me with him as he moved to switch off the light. He then settled, spooning me.
My eyes were just drifting closed when he spoke into the dark. “You were right. What you said about me trusting you. I didn’t even realize it until you said it.”
Fully alert, I ran the tips of my fingers along his forearm. “It’s okay.”
“I need you to understand something. I need you to understand why I reacted the way I did, why I didn’t give myself time to think. See . . .” His voice grew low. “All those years ago on Scotland Street when I stepped out of Ellie’s door and you turned around, I thought—” He cut off abruptly, subconsciously tightening his hold on me.
“You thought?”
“I don’t know how to say it without sounding like a cheesy idiot.”
“I just proposed to you without a ring or an actual plan in front of your whole family. There’s no judgment here.”
He laughed, his breath puffing against my neck. “True.” He kissed me again. “When you turned around, it was like you’d . . . I don’t know, like, you’d been conjured from air or something just for me. I can’t explain it. I just knew that you were meant for me,” he confessed. “To me it was like you were there to make up for all the bad stuff that had come before you. But then just like that you went away and I guess I believed that made more sense than anything good ever could. At the time anyway. I grew up and grew out of that broody shit.” He gave me a squeeze and I wondered if he could hear how hard and fast my heart was pumping in my chest.
“And then you walked back into my life and I wanted you. Because I felt drawn to you still. It was, and is, powerful, Shannon. I’ve never felt like that with any woman.
“Jo, Hannah, Liv, all of them are special to me and I’ve always had reasons to trust them. But you . . . Someone tried to break you, take you away from yourself, and in a way take you away from me. I guess I’ve just been waiting for you to stop trusting me because it doesn’t seem possible that I get to keep this dream.” He leaned over and I turned my head to meet his gaze, feeling so much more for this man than I’d known it was possible to feel. “I’m sorry if I let you down lately.”
“No.” The tears came and I let them fall. “Cole, you could never let me down. Do you know what it means to me that you see me that way? Don’t you get it? You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever met—you’re kind and smart, loyal and compassionate, and strong and talented and brave and forgiving. You’re everything I ever wanted from life, and that you feel the same way back . . . All my life I’ve been scared and I never knew why.” I smiled through my tears. “I’m not scared anymore.”
He crushed my lips beneath his, his groans of joy surrounding me like everything else about him.
Once he was finished showing his appreciation for my words, my confession, I settled back, clasping his arm tight to my breasts, and I promised him, “I meant what I said. I’ll never choose anyone over you. My family should care enough not to put me in that position. I’m going to see them next week and that’s exactly what I’m going to tell them.”
I felt Cole’s hesitation and he didn’t even have to say what he was thinking. I just knew.
“Don’t worry. This is what I want. Logan wants this for me too. The contention between me and my family doesn’t need to affect my relationship with my brother.” I relaxed deeper against my pillow. “Cole . . . they’ve never given me what you’ve given me. Not once. You’re worth it.” I smiled into the dark of our bedroom. “You’re worth every bad thing that’s ever happened to me, because going through them led me to you.”
“Shannon.” He pulled me closer, his voice gruff, thick with emotion.
I decided to stop there. Cole finally got it.
I wasn’t going anywhere.
Why would I when I had the best seat in the house?
*
“I guess this means I need to start being nice to you again?” Rae wrinkled her nose.
Cole and I had just been ambushed. We broke the news of our engagement to Rae and Simon that morning before clients started appearing, and it had been received with enthusiastic congratulations, followed by whispering and secretive, mischievous glances.
Their behavior started to make sense ten minutes after our last client left and the bell over the door rang. In walked Stu, followed by Tony. Rae and Simon had called to tell them about our news. Stu set off party poppers around us. I got bear hugs from all the guys and finally a tentative embrace from Rae.