Diamonds are Forever

The Diamond Dad


Lucy Gordon





About the Author



LUCY GORDON cut her writing teeth on magazine journalism, interviewing many of the world’s most interesting men, including Warren Beatty, Charlton Heston and Sir Roger Moore. She also camped out with lions in Africa and had many other unusual experiences, which have often provided the background for her books. Several years ago, while staying Venice, she met a Venetian who proposed in two days. They have been married ever since. Naturally this has affected her writing, where romantic Italian men tend to feature strongly.

Two of her books have won a Romance Writers of America RITA? Award. You can visit her website at www.lucy-gordon.com.





CHAPTER ONE




‘YOU!’ Garth Clayton said in a stunned voice. ‘What are you doing here?’

Faye, his estranged wife, faced him with her head up. Inwardly she was thinking, Two years, and he still hasn’t forgiven me! Will that make it easier, or harder, to do what I have to?

‘Aren’t you going to invite me in?’ she asked.

He didn’t move. ‘When you left this house you swore that you’d never come back.’

‘We both said a lot of angry things on that night, but we didn’t mean them.’

‘I meant every word,’ he said, unyielding.

He seemed older than his thirty-five years, she thought. There was a new darkness in his brown eyes and fine lines at the corners that hadn’t been there before. He looked as though he lived on his nerves, neither eating nor sleeping enough. But he would always be a tall, handsome man, whose sensual, mobile mouth had once thrilled her, even though that mouth now had a look of strain and bitterness.

Faye knew that she, too, had altered. The gauche teenager of their wedding day had become a mother of two children with a mind of her own and enough strength to stand up to her husband’s forceful personality. These days she had a poise and confidence that was reflected in the strong colours she wore, replacing the delicate hues of a few years ago.

‘I’ve come to talk,’ she said.

He stood back to let her pass. She could feel his eyes on her, taking in the new short crop of her light brown hair. She wasn’t expensively dressed, but she had a tall, slender figure that made everything look good. Her russet suit with its gilt buttons looked stylish, suggesting a woman who was at ease with herself.

He indicated the living room and Faye was a little surprised to find it just as she remembered. Garth had been so angry when she left that she’d pictured him wiping out all traces of her, but everything was the same. This was where they’d had their final quarrel, when she’d tried vainly to make him understand why she had to escape him.

‘A drink?’ he asked.

‘No thank you. I’m driving.’

His eyebrows raised a little. ‘You’ve learned to drive?’


‘Yes, I found it quite easy.’

‘When you had an instructor who could keep calm,’ he finished wryly.

‘That helped,’ she admitted.

Their very first vehicle had been a shabby third-hand truck to get Garth started as a builder. Later, when the money had flowed freely, he’d bought her an expensive car and had tried to teach her to drive, but it had been a disaster. She’d lacked the confidence to try again, and when she fled she’d left the car behind.

Disturbing feelings began to play back. Perhaps she shouldn’t have come to this luxurious house, which he’d built ‘for her’ but which reflected his own tastes. Here, she’d shared a bed with Garth but nothing else, and she’d always disliked the place. Yet she’d smothered her true feelings, as so often in her marriage, and pretended delight to please her husband.

That, however, was in the past. Their marriage was over in all but name. She was her own woman now.

Once her heart had beat with eager anticipation at the thought of seeing Garth Clayton. With his dark hair, vivid looks and lithe grace, he’d seemed almost godlike to the eighteen-year-old Faye. He’d worked on a building site that she’d passed every day on her way to work in a dress shop. Sometimes she would stop and regard him from a distance, admiring the way he leaped over the scaffolding, never afraid of the drop, or lifted heavy weights as though they were nothing.

She was so innocent that she hardly recognized her admiration for his splendid body as the flickering of desire. She only knew that she had to make him notice her. When at last he winked at her, she blushed deeply and scurried away to the shop. For the rest of the day she was nearly useless, having to be recalled from a trance when someone spoke to her, and giving customers the wrong change. Her boss spoke sharply, but Faye barely heard. She was in seventh heaven.

He was waiting for her at the wire next morning. ‘Didn’t mean to upset you yesterday,’ he said gruffly.

‘You didn’t. I was just—surprised.’

‘Surprised? A pretty girl like you?’

Bliss! He’d called her pretty.

They went to the cinema but to her disappointment he didn’t kiss her, only brushed her hand against his cheek. She was wretched, sure that he found her boring. But he asked her out again, and on the third date he kissed her. She thought there couldn’t be more happiness than that in the world.

But there was. The memory of their first lovemaking could still bring tears to her eyes. The young Garth had vigour rather than subtlety but he was kind and gentle, treating her as something precious.

‘Don’t go yet,’ he begged as she got dressed.

‘I have to. I’ll miss my last bus.’

‘I’ll come home with you. I don’t want to say goodbye.’

‘But there’s no bus back,’ she said, loving him for not wanting to say goodbye.

In the end he came to the stop with her and held her close until the bus appeared. She sat at the back so that she could watch him standing in the road with his hands stretched up to the glass. And when the bus moved off he stayed there, his eyes fixed on her until she turned the corner.

When they weren’t making love, they talked. He told her how he dreamed of being his own boss, a builder with a little business that would grow. For him, the sky was the limit. Faye couldn’t remember discussing what she wanted from life. But then, all she wanted was him.

When she told him she was pregnant he said, ‘I’ve got a week free between jobs next month. We’ll use that for our honeymoon.’

‘Honeymoon?’ she echoed joyfully. ‘You mean—get married?’

‘Of course we’re going to get married!’

She was too happy to care that he told her, not asked her. She wanted to be his wife more than anything in the world. They were married in a register office and spent a week by the sea in a borrowed caravan that had seen better days. With almost no money, there was little to do except walk hand in hand on the beach, eat whatever was cheap, and love, and love, and love. It was a time of unspoiled bliss and she was sure that their marriage would be a success.

But that was when she was an innocent who believed love was for ever, before the discovery of Garth’s true character and the gradual destruction of all that gave her happiness. Now they’d reached the end of the road, and she’d come driving through the darkness to Elm Ridge to confront him.

He followed her into the living room and stood waiting for her to begin. The air was alive with tension and she knew this was going to be harder than she’d thought. To give herself a moment she slipped off her jacket, revealing a sleeveless olive-green shirt, adorned by a chain.

Garth studied that chain. Solid gold if he was any judge. Simple, yet very costly. Not something she would have bought for herself, nor one of his own gifts, most of which she’d left behind.

Her perfume was elusive, like woodsmoke drifting on the breeze. It had a subtlety that told him more clearly than anything else that he no longer knew this woman.

‘You sure picked your moment to come calling,’ he said. ‘I was about to go to bed.’

‘I left it late to give you time to get home from work. I hope I haven’t interrupted you when you have company.’

‘A woman? No, that was one accusation even you were never able to throw at me, although apparently I was every other kind of villain.’

‘I never said that, Garth. It was just that I couldn’t live with you any more.’

‘So you claimed. I never quite understood why.’

‘I tried to explain—’

‘I gather that my crime was to work day and night to give you a comfortable life, with every luxury you could want. For this I was punished by the loss of my wife and both my children.’ A touch of iron in his voice made it clear that he was as unyielding as ever.

‘Perhaps I’d better go away and return another time …’

‘No! You must have come here for some reason. You’ve kept well clear of me, Faye. Even when the children visit me, you never come with them. When I collect them from your house, you speak to me as little as possible.’

‘I don’t want to upset them with fighting.’

‘How are they? It seems a long time since I saw them.’

‘You could have seen them last week if you’d come to Cindy’s school play, as you promised. She had the lead. She was longing for you to be there and be proud of her.’

‘I meant to, but at the last minute something came up.’

Faye sighed. ‘Something always did come up, Garth. A business deal was always more important than your children.’

‘That’s not true. I was there for Adrian’s birthday.’

‘Only for two hours. And you didn’t come to see him playing football, did you? He really minded about that. And Cindy was heartbroken when you missed her birthday last year. She loves you so much, and you let her down all the time. It’s her birthday again next week. She’ll be eight. Oh please, Garth, try to be there, just this once.’

‘Saturday? Hell, I don’t think I can make it. I’ve got a client—’ He saw her looking at him with resignation and said, ‘Was this what you came for?’

‘No, I came to say I want a divorce.’

He took a sharp breath. ‘That’s a bit sudden, isn’t it?’

‘We’ve been separated for two years. You’ve always known I wanted a divorce.’


‘I thought you’d have seen sense by now.’

‘You mean, return to you?’ She gave a brief, wry laugh. ‘I remember that your version of seeing sense was always people doing what suited you.’

‘Because I was the reasonable one! Look at how you behaved after you left. It was always crazy for you to live in that poky little house while I was alone in this huge place. You could have a beautiful home but you prefer a rabbit hutch. You wouldn’t even let me give you enough money for a decent place.’

‘You pay to support the children—’

‘But you won’t accept a penny for yourself,’ he said bitterly. ‘Do you know how that makes me feel?’

‘I’m sorry, Garth, but I don’t want to depend on you. That puzzles you, doesn’t it? Your life is dedicated to squeezing the last penny out of every deal. You don’t understand someone who doesn’t want money from you, but I don’t. I never did. I wanted—’ She checked herself.

‘What, Faye? What did you want? Because I swear I never found out what it was.’

‘Didn’t you? And yet at one time you gave it to me,’ she said with a touch of wistfulness. ‘When we were first married, everything I needed came from you. On our wedding day I was the happiest woman on earth. I had your love; I was expecting our baby—’

‘We rented a two-roomed flat with no hot water,’ he recalled.

‘I didn’t care. All I cared about was loving you, and having you love me.’

‘Did I ever stop?’ he demanded. ‘Was there one day of our marriage when I wasn’t trying to give you the best of everything? I did it all to please you, and you tossed it back at me like so much garbage.’

‘I already had the best of everything. But you took it away.’

‘I didn’t stop loving you,’ he said almost angrily.

‘But you stopped having time for me.’

He would have answered, but the phone began to ring. He snatched up the receiver. ‘I’ll get rid of whoever it is. Hello—Look, I can’t talk now, I’m tied up—Oh, hell! Can’t he call back later?—I know I’ve been trying to get him, but—All right! Put him through.’

‘I see your technique for getting rid of people hasn’t improved,’ Faye said lightly.

He scowled. ‘Five minutes. That’s all. I’ll take it in the study.’

‘Can I make myself some tea?’

‘This is your home. Go where you like!’ He vanished into the study.

The big, glamorous kitchen had all the latest gadgetry cunningly concealed beneath oak and copper pots. That and the dark red tiles on the floor gave it an air of warmth, but Faye had never found it warm. Garth had told her to select whatever decor she liked, but then promoted his own preference so insistently that she’d yielded. It seemed to have been chosen not for herself, but for someone called Garth Clayton’s wife. Was it then she’d started to feel that she didn’t fit the role? No, much earlier.

How eagerly he’d first shown her the house! It was set in its own grounds on a slight incline, surrounded by elm trees. ‘Here you are, darling,’ he’d said. ‘Welcome to Elm Ridge. Your new home, like you always wanted.’ His pride had been touching, and she’d lacked the heart to say that it wasn’t the home she’d wanted. Nothing like it.

Her dream home had been ‘a little place all our own’, as he’d once promised. And two years after their marriage they’d had a small house, for Garth was a man born to succeed. She’d been completely happy. But four years later he’d swept her away into this big, unfriendly mansion. She’d even had a housekeeper, a bustling, kindly soul called Nancy. Faye made friends with her and enjoyed many a chat in the kitchen, for she felt more at home with Nancy than with any of her husband’s new, moneyed friends.

When the tea was made she wandered back to the study door, behind which she could hear him arguing with someone. Long experience made her murmur, ‘Half an hour at the least.’

Wherever she looked she could see few changes. The pictures on the stair walls were the ones she’d chosen. She’d taken one of them with her, and its place was still blank.

Here she’d once been unhappy and stifled. Garth had been generous, giving her everything that money could buy, but he’d also arranged her life and their children’s lives, from on high. The little builder’s yard he’d managed to scrape together had nearly gone under in the first year. He’d saved it by the skin of his teeth, but Faye had known nothing about this until she’d learned by accident three years later. The discovery that she’d been excluded from his inner counsels had been like a blow over the heart.

He’d failed to see that she was no longer the blindly adoring girl he’d married. She’d matured into a woman with a mind of her own, who still loved him, but now knew that he wasn’t perfect.

They argued about the children. Garth was pleased with his son yet hardly seemed to notice his daughter. But Cindy adored her father and Faye often saw a wistful look in the child’s eyes at his neglect.

Adrian, too, suffered a kind of neglect. Garth would buy him anything, but he wouldn’t take time off to watch Adrian play in the school football team. He was determined to rear the boy to be ‘successful’ as he understood the word, but Adrian wanted to be a footballer. Garth dismissed this with a shrug. ‘He’ll grow out of it,’ he told Faye. ‘Just don’t encourage him.’

She yielded in their disputes, telling herself that to be with him was enough. But her children were another matter. She stood up for them with a strength that surprised Garth. Arguments became quarrels. When she could stand it no longer, she left him, taking the children.

The last thing he said to her was ‘Don’t fool yourself that it’s over, Faye. It never will be.’

She continued upstairs, to what had been Adrian’s room, but the door was locked. So was Cindy’s, and the one that led into the bedroom she’d shared with Garth. Frowning, she returned downstairs.

Here the doors were open and next to the study Faye found Garth’s new bedroom, little more than a monkish cupboard, with a plain bed and a set of mahogany furniture. The walls were white; the carpet biscuit-coloured. Everything was of excellent quality but the total effect was bleak, as though the man who owned it carried bleakness within himself.

The sole ornament was a photograph beside the bed, showing a young boy of about nine, with a bright, eager face. Faye smiled, recognizing Adrian, but her smile changed to a frown as she saw there was no picture of Cindy.

She waited in the hall until he emerged from the study.

‘What’s the matter?’ he asked, seeing her face.

‘I’d like to see your study. There’s something I have to know.’

The study told her the same story. There on the desk were two photographs of Adrian, but none of Cindy.

‘How dare you?’ she said, turning on him. ‘You had no right to censor your own child out of existence. Cindy’s still your daughter, and she loves you.’

‘I don’t know what you—’

‘Where’s her picture? You’ve got Adrian’s. Where’s Cindy’s?’

‘Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t do it on purpose. I just didn’t notice—’

‘You never noticed her, and you broke her heart. The only one you cared for was Adrian, and then only when you could see yourself in him. But he isn’t like you. He’s gentle and sensitive.’


‘There’s nothing gentle about him when he’s kicking a ball around a pitch.’

‘How would you know? You’ve hardly ever seen him. Yes, he plays a tough game but he’s a nice person. He looks after Cindy; he cares about people.’

‘Everything I’m not, apparently,’ he said in a tight voice.

‘Yes. He doesn’t like the things you like, and I won’t have him forced to be someone he isn’t. That’s one of the reasons I left: to protect them from you.’

‘That’s a dreadful thing to say,’ he told her, his face very pale.

‘It’s a dreadful thing to be true. Garth, I came here tonight because I’m tired of living in limbo. I really want that divorce.’

‘I’ll never give you one. I told you that when you left.’

‘Yes, you said you’d take the children if I went for a divorce. That scared me at the time. You even used it to make me give up my job—’

‘You didn’t need to work. I offered you a large allowance—’

‘But I wanted to be independent.’

He didn’t understand that. He never had. He’d thought it madness when she’d struggled to get a diploma in bookkeeping through a correspondence course. She’d been thrilled to get work with Kendall Haines, a local environmentalist, but Garth’s bitter anger had made her leave the job.

Refusing to be defeated, she’d approached the problem in a different way. She had a real flair for bookkeeping and began taking in freelance work from several small, local businesses. She’d used a computer that had been very basic even when she’d bought it second-hand, and which now looked as if it had come out of the Ark. The budget wouldn’t run to the modern machine she longed for, yet still she was content. She’d won her independence in the face of Garth’s hostility.

But his high-handed action still rankled. ‘I was happy in that job until you forced me to leave it to stop you claiming Cindy and Adrian,’ she told him now. ‘I couldn’t see it then, but that threat was nonsense. No court would have given you the children, and if it had you wouldn’t have known what to do with them. It’s just that you can’t bear to let go of what was once yours. But we’re not property, and it’s time to let go.’

‘What makes you think I’ve changed my mind?’

‘It doesn’t matter. Time has passed. Sooner or later we’ll divorce, and I’d like it to be sooner. Our tenth wedding anniversary is coming up, and I don’t want to be legally your wife on that day. Can’t you see that it would be a mockery?’

‘You were still my wife on our ninth anniversary. What difference does it make now?’

‘The tenth is special,’ she argued. ‘It’s the first of the big ones: ten, twenty, twenty-five, fifty. Ten is like a milestone. It says that your marriage has lasted. But ours hasn’t.’

He looked at her closely. ‘Is that the only reason?’

Under his keen gaze, she coloured. ‘No, I—I want to get married again.’

She waited for his anger at this offence to his pride, but it didn’t come and this disconcerted her. ‘Tell me about him,’ he said mildly.

‘He’s a kind man and I love him.’

‘And you think he can fill my place with my children?’

‘He already does and he’s doing a terrific job. He’s there for them.’

‘He has no right to be. I’m still their father, just as I’m still your husband.’

‘And what you have, you hold. I might have known.’

He touched the gold chain about her neck. ‘Did he give you this?’

‘Yes.’

‘I wouldn’t have thought Kendall Haines could have afforded that. He’s obviously more successful than I realized. But he still isn’t the right man for you.’

‘I never told you his name. How did you—?’ She gasped in outrage. ‘You ‘ve had me spied on!’

‘I always keep up-to-date information about my investments,’ he said coolly. ‘I knew when you went to work for him, and the first time you dated him.’

She drew a sharp breath. ‘That was why you made me leave that job,’ she said angrily. ‘Because I was falling in love with him. You’re even trying to control me now.’

‘This man isn’t right for you.’

‘I think he is and I’m going to marry him. I can’t be browbeaten any more, Garth—’

He took a quick breath. ‘Browbeaten? Is that how you think of a marriage in which I gave you everything—?’

‘Except yourself. Once you got your own business you were never there when I needed you. You handed your gifts down from on high and expected me to defer to you, and when I started answering back you didn’t like it. I had to escape—’

‘You’ll never escape me,’ he said harshly. ‘I won’t allow it.’

‘You think you’re going to turn the full might of the law onto me—?’

‘No, it’s much simpler than that,’ he said softly, and pulled her into his arms.

He was too quick for her to avoid him and before she knew it his lips were on hers, caressing her with the same fierce purpose as in the past. In the beginning it had delighted her. Now, she was filled with outrage at his arrogance. Once, their sexual rapport had been perfect. Even when they had quarrelled it had still been there, giving them an illusion of a marriage. Now he thought he had only to remind her of that to overcome her will.

She fought to remain still and inwardly resist him. It should be easy with her anger to help her. Besides, she was strong now. If she waited, he would soon see that it was no use.

But his lips were full of persuasion, coaxing her to relive hot, brilliant moments, when the world had been full of love and beauty. If he’d been possessive, so had she, caressing and cherishing his body, rejoicing that he had chosen her for this magic gift. He had been young and his frame had been at its magnificent best; long legs and arms, a smooth brown chest, and hips whose power could make her cry out with ecstasy.

In the lonely, sobbing nights after their separation, she’d fought to deaden those memories and believed she’d succeeded. But he was here now, the living, breathing man, determined to make her remember what had united them, and forget what had driven them apart.

‘You’ll never escape me,’ he murmured against her mouth, ‘as long as we have this.’

His lips moved insistently against hers. This. One little word to sum up a dazzling, glorious and finally bitter experience: passion and grief intermingled. Love, pain, disillusion. All these things were there the moment he touched her, indestructible after all this time.

‘I never forgot you,’ he said hoarsely. ‘Not for a moment. You were always with me—just as I was always with you—’

She tried to deny it but the treacherous warmth was already filling her body, weakening her will, making her want things she had no right to want. She’d sworn this wouldn’t happen, but the memory of his passion still lived in her flesh, recalling her to life. She had once loved him so much, and though love might be finished, she was what that love had made her, and the past could never be destroyed completely.

For a few treacherous moments her body moulded itself to his, burning with remembered desire and need. She’d belonged to him completely, but that was a long time ago—although it seemed only yesterday—this very moment—for ever—


‘It’s not so easy, is it, Faye?’ he whispered. ‘It’s not so easy to forget the truth …’

But the arrogant words shouted in her brain like a warning. Faye shuddered as she saw how close she’d come to weakening. Garth was a clever man and this was no more than a cynical mockery of love. She took a deep breath and forced her head to clear.

‘The truth is that everything is over between us,’ she said emphatically. ‘Can’t you understand that?’

‘Why should I?’ he growled. ‘You don’t kiss me as though it was all over.’

‘I’m in love with another man …’

‘Little liar!’

‘And I’m going to marry him. You can’t stop me.’ Putting out all her strength, she broke free of him. ‘You thought it was going to be easy, didn’t you, Garth? When I arrived tonight you were sure I was going to drop into your hands. But I’m not like that any more. I’ve made my own life and there’s no room in it for you.’

Garth was very pale. ‘We’ll see about that.’

But he was talking to empty air. Faye had fled the house.