chapter 4
The ride into the city took longer than I had remembered. I stared out the window watching the world whiz by, and waiting for the city to come into view. I’d put my hair into a pony and braided the remainder, and now twisted the end around my fingers as I anxiously waited for us to reach our destination. I hadn’t seen Jacklyn, my human mother, or Liz since I’d left so many weeks ago. Would they still recognize me?
Arrick rested a hand on my knee, settling its incessant shaking. “Are you nervous?” I nodded, biting at my nails. “They aren’t going to feel any different about you, Claire. You’re still the same inside.”
“You’re right. I don’t know why I’m nervous at all. I’ve known them my whole life, and Liz is my best friend. Nothing can change that, right?” I hoped not. I was still hurt that Liz had never seen me off the day I’d left for the palace, but I understood why she hadn’t. If it had been her, I might have done the same thing. It would have been too difficult to see her leave.
“So, where do you want to go first?”
Arrick took the exit that led into the city. The trees thinned out and made way for towering apartment buildings and business complexes. The differences between the Naos region and Noire region were suddenly so apparent. There were so many technologies here that we didn’t have in Naos. Would Liz still like it there when she learned there weren’t any night clubs or shopping malls? Would Jacklyn still agree to go when she discovered she couldn’t click away on her cell phone twenty-four seven? Cellular coverage in Naos was horrible.
“Let’s go to my house… I mean Jacklyn’s.” It felt strange calling her by her first name, or even calling it my house since it technically wasn’t and really never was.
The street I grew up on no longer held the same feeling it used to. Arrick pulled up in front of my old house. I’d always thought that when I came back here it would be different.
“Want me to go in with you?” he asked, putting the car in park before pulling the key out of the ignition.
I looked at the dash and checked the time, eleven-thirty p.m. Jacklyn would definitely be up, watching the news and probably the clip on Nicolae’s statement about the attack. I grasped the door handle, before looking at Arrick’s waiting expression.
“I’d like that.”
Before I knew it I was standing at the front door. I’d reached for the knob before catching myself. I couldn’t just waltz in, I didn’t live here anymore. Should I knock, or ring the doorbell? I decided to knock, we’d never liked the chime that played on the doorbell, but never knew how to change it. The high pitch of the dings and dongs always gave Jacklyn a headache.
I heard movement inside and the click of the remote as she muted the television that was blaring loudly. She’d always liked it loud enough that she could hear it everywhere in the house. I moaned at the memory. Growing up, I woke up with a lot of baggy eyes due to her loud television habit.
“Who is it?” I heard Jacklyn call from the other side of the door. She was no doubt standing on her tip toes to peep through the viewing hole, but it was too dark on the stoop to ever see anything. The bulb on the porch had burnt out long before I’d left and she still hadn’t replaced it.
“It’s…” my voice came out as a whisper, so I swallowed hard in the hopes of clearing it. “It’s Claire.” She must have recognized my voice because the door swung open before I could finish.
“Claire!” Her face beamed with complete and utter surprise before she bounded into my arms. “Oh, sweetie! I thought I’d never see you again. How are you? Come inside!” She bubbled over with excitement, stumbling over her own feet as she ushered me in.
I followed her into the living room to discover piles of boxes covering every inch of free space. Was she moving? She caught me eyeing the space and dashed over to a box, pulling the flaps open to dig inside.
“Take a look at these! Aren’t they amazing? I had them done a couple weeks ago, they just arrived.” She pulled out a handful of buttons, before handing them to me one-by-one. They each had individual sayings like; “Donate for Life”, “Blood = Love”, and “Don’t Hate, Donate!”
“They’re very nice.” I offered her back the buttons after feigning interest in their design. She was as consumed with VR as she ever was. Her obsession with vampire relations had definitely gotten worse without me around.
“Oh, keep them! Give them to your friends.” She smiled like she’d just given me the greatest gift and then shifted her eyes toward the television to peek at the news. I dropped the pins into my purse and rolled my eyes. Shifting my body aside to block the television, I lowered my head so I could make eye contact with her.
“I came here because there was something I wanted to talk to you about.”
“Of course, of course. Come, have a seat.” She shuffled through a mess of papers on the couch, before picking them up and dropping them on the coffee table.
I sat down awkwardly, remembering that the last time I’d sat here was when Fox had uttered the words that changed my life forever. Where would I be right now if he’d never shown up? I turned to look at Arrick as he stood by the front door; would he still have come for me and taken me to Naos, or would he have let me live my life out as a human? Despite all the darkness that had entered my life I was still proud to be a vampire. I still felt the loss of the dreams I had once had, but I could no longer imagine a life without him in it, or the rest of my vampire family for that matter. They were my world now, not the one I’d left behind. Yet, here I was in the living room of a woman who’d always favored work over me. She’d never been cruel to me in any way, but there had always been something missing in our relationship. Even so, I couldn’t leave her here, defenseless against The Dark should they decide to attack the city next.
Her attention was finally riveted on me and her eyes widened as she gazed at my face. “Let me take a look at you.” She leaned in, cupping my cheek with one hand and caressing my long hair with the other. “You’re even prettier than on TV. Immortality suits you my dear.”
“You saw me?” I’d wondered if she’d seen me. My heart fluttered at the thought. I still craved attention from her, acceptance.
“I did. You look beautiful…” she took in my full form as I sat slightly slumped on the couch, “but you looked tired now. Is everything okay?”
I sighed. We were finally getting on topic. “No, everything is not okay. That’s what I’ve come to talk to you about.”
“Who’s your friend?” Her eyes shifted over to Arrick, and I had to bite my tongue to keep from moaning. She had always been riveted by vampires, and even though I now was one I still couldn’t get her to pay attention.
“That’s Arrick. He’s my…” How do I explain him? Humans didn’t know about Blood Mates and I didn’t feel like explaining it to her. Now wasn’t the time for that, I had other things I wanted to discuss. More important things.
“I’m her personal bodyguard,” Arrick answered for me with pride. He stepped further into the room, his hands locked behind his back. He’d kept the suit and tie on from the news interview, making him looked polished and virile.
“Splendid! Please have a seat.” She pushed off rolled up posters on a nearby armchair and gestured for him to have a seat. “It’s good to hear you’re being protected. You can never be too cautious in times like these. I saw the news. I’m so glad you’re all right.”
“That’s what I’ve come to talk to you about.” I grabbed her hand to direct her attention back toward me, she was worse than a child sometimes.
“What’s wrong?” Her voice was suddenly concerned.
How do I say this? There was no gentle way to let this cat out of the bag, so my only option was to just come straight out with it. “What you saw on the news wasn’t the whole truth.” Her brow wrinkled in confusion and she glanced back at the news that was repeating the interview, like she’d missed something. I couldn’t hold back a moan of annoyance, and as I clenched my teeth; my fangs pushing into my lips. Arrick nodded at me to continue. “It wasn’t the anti-vampire league that attacked the palace.”
“But that’s what King Nicolae said. I just saw it on the news. Those protestors have turned into a full scale gang since you left, dear. They’ve caused trouble all over the city and not just at the palace. Did I tell you they vandalized my office building?” The words were flying out of her at high speed, so I threw my hands up to silence her.
“Okay, okay. That may all be true, but they didn’t attack the palace and I know that for a fact.” I gave her a stern, challenging look and she swallowed hard. I realized then that she probably felt what I had when I’d first met Fox. Did I have the same effect on her? If I did, I should probably keep my anger in control. I leaned back and softened my expression.
“What are you saying?” Jacklyn asked, sounding fearful.
“What I’m saying,” I grasped her hands in mine and sighed, “Nicolae said it was them because he didn’t want the people to know what really happened. It would cause mass hysteria, and it would be too dangerous for people to know the truth right now, but I couldn’t lie to you. It’s not safe for you here.”
Arrick leaned forward, balancing his elbows on his knees. “What Claire is trying to say is that a danger far greater than the anti-vampire league is at work here.”
Jacklyn shook her head. “Why are you telling me this?” Her voice was wavering in fear.
I dropped out of my seat to my knees and knelt before her. “I’m not trying to scare you. I’m trying to warn you.” Before I knew it I was emitting my emotions toward her and embracing her with them, trying to calm her fears. “I want to keep you safe.”
“Wha… What really happened then?” She began rubbing her temples as her voice calmed and her breathing relaxed.
“There’s a group of really bad vampires that don’t like the way we live.” I was sugar coating it to say the least, but did I really need to tell her that evil personified wanted to kill us all?
“Bad vampires?” She said those two words like they didn’t make sense to her. I should have known she wouldn’t understand. In her eyes, vampires were as good as gods. Bad and vampires were two words that didn’t go together.
“Yes.” I pulled myself back onto the couch. “You know the history of the dark ages, don’t you?” She nodded. “Well…” I was going to have to stop beating around the bush and just come out with it. Maybe she would be able to handle the truth better than I thought she could. “There’s a vampire named Baal that Nicolae fought in the dark ages. Everyone thought he was gone, but he’s been spending all this time regaining his power. And now…” I could see her mind reeling as her eyes grew wide. How could I put this without making her head explode?
“Baal has returned. He craves a world of chaos, where vampires hold dominion over humans. Where they feed freely and kill whomever they desire,” Arrick interjected without faltering.
Jacklyn slapped her hand over her mouth in shock. “This can’t be!” She gasped through her fingers. “Nicolae would never let that happen.”
My brow furrowed, she still wasn’t getting it. “None of us want it to happen, and we’re going to do everything we can to stop him, but he’s already attacked so many. Not just in this region.”
She rose from her seat slowly, before starting to pace the room. “This just can’t be,” she repeated over and over as she hugged herself.
After what felt like an eternity of watching her walk back and forth like a clock pendulum, I rose and clicked off the TV before grasping her by the shoulders and holding her before me. “Come with me. I can keep you safe.” I searched her watery eyes, but she avoided my gaze.
“I can’t.” She pulled away from me and walked to the china cabinet where she kept her liquor. She poured herself a glass of the amber liquid and downed it in one gulp. “I can’t come with you.”
“What? Why not?”
It never occurred to me that she would say no. I only worried that the truth of what happened would scare her to death, and even though she looked like she’d seen a ghost, she wanted to stay.
She poured another drink, but sipped it as she took a seat on the arm of the couch. She eyed the many boxes throughout the room; the flyers, posters, banners, and buttons, before she spoke. “Our world was once a dangerous place to live; and it will be again, not because of the evil in it, but because of those who don’t stand up against it.”
“What?” I’d heard what she said, but I didn’t understand her reaction. Was she seriously going to stay? She would be defenseless against them. Their vile minds wouldn’t think twice before consuming her life blood and slaughtering her with a single swing.
“Do you know who said that?” Jacklyn took on a faraway look as she swallowed the last of her drink.
“No, and I don’t care. You can’t stay here, Jacklyn! It’s too dangerous. How are you going to protect yourself from them, huh? Do you have any idea how powerful they are?”
I dashed to her in less than the blink of an eye, clutching her hand in mine. If I had to beg her I would, anything to get her to come with me. She might not have been my real mother, she might have been consumed with her work, but she raised me. For eighteen years she was there with me every day, and I didn’t want to see her hurt. I didn’t want to see her dead. I knew I was going to outlive her, but I wasn’t ready for that day to come anytime soon.
“Titan,” Arrick answered solemnly.
“Titan? Who’s Titan?” I turned around to face him, my hands on my hips. He was supposed to be helping me convince her to come, not joining in on her riddles.
“You know your history.” She beamed at him, all the fear gone from her face. “I read once that he never believed the dark ages would be gone for good.”
“He didn’t.” Arrick joined Jacklyn as she invited him to take a seat at the dining table.
“I snuck into the restricted section of the library once and read about him.” She pulled out a seat and let herself down with a sigh. “He made me fall in love with vampires. I was about Claire’s age when I pledged my life to them. It’s been my life’s goal to get others to see them as I do. So many only see the evil of the past, they can’t look beyond it and truly see what amazing things they are capable of.” Her face took on a dreamy expression that was the complete opposite of my own.
“You’re really going to stay? Seriously?” I did my best to hold back my anger, but my annoyance bubbled through freely.
“Now, more than ever, I’m needed here.” She rose and took me in her arms for the first real hug we’d shared in longer than I could remember. “If there is a force out there that wants to tear us apart, the only thing we can do is stand together. This is my calling, Claire bear. Do you understand?” She used the childhood nickname she’d given me that I hadn’t heard since I still had recess during school.
I did understand, but I didn’t like it. I thought she was being careless and selfish. Had I really expected her to choose me over her work? I suppose I had. I felt Arrick’s hand fall onto my shoulder so I pulled away as unshed tears clung to my eyes. Leaving her here now was harder than when I had left to move to the palace. She’d made her choice and I tried my hardest to respect that. All my life I’d been jealous of her work, but now I realized that to her it was more than just a day job, it was who she was. Jacklyn was going to continue fighting for what she believed in and I admired that, but I also hated her for it.
“If you need anything…” My words came out strained as I fought the emotions inside me. I wanted to lash out at her and pull her to the car against her will all at once. The thought that I could easily do so was hard to ignore.
“I’ll call you,” she answered with a smile, cupping my face and planting a kiss on my cheek. Tears spilled from her eyes as she pulled away. “I’m so proud of you, Claire.”
The dam on my tears broke and they flooded out with reckless abandon. I’d waited my whole life to hear her say those words. Why had she waited until now to say them?
“If you change your mind…” Arrick leaned around me, handing Jacklyn a small business card, “you can reach me directly at this number.” He pointed to the card and she nodded.
“Thank you.” She wiped at the tears on her face, the bracelets on her wrists clinking with every movement. With her arms wrapped around herself in a hug, she looked to Arrick and me. “Take care of her.”
“I will.” Strength resonated in his voice and I felt his arm slide around my waist as he held me to him. The vibration of his heart pounded against my shoulder blades.
Before I knew it we were saying our goodbyes and making our way out the front door. Letting go of Jacklyn was a lot harder than I had expected. I had never realized how much she really meant to me. Maybe because I was always too busy being a rebellious teenager. Maybe because I would never allow myself to, period. Or maybe, after having spent so much time with Ione and Evilyn, I had begun to truly appreciate how much the women in my life had done for me, and all they had sacrificed.
There was so much more I wanted to talk to her about; things I wanted to ask her, but they would have to wait. Now wasn’t the time to reveal I knew the truth about my birth; that she had adopted me and I was a vampire by birthright. I’d already dropped one bomb on her already. Maybe she had never intended to tell me I was adopted, or perhaps she had been waiting till the right time, but it really didn’t matter. I knew who my real parents were now, and that was all that mattered. Jaclyn would still always hold a very special place in my heart no matter how I came into her life.
Arrick opened the door of the car and I dropped inside with the weight of the world on my shoulders. He slid into the driver’s seat beside me seconds later, shutting the door with a nearly inaudible click. “You okay?”
I nodded feebly in answer.
“Come here.” He opened his arms and I leaned over, resting my head against his chest. My tears had subsided, but a dreadful feeling was bleeding out into my heart. Should I have forced her to come with us? At least then I’d know she’d be safe.
“You did the right thing,” he answered the questions that were twirling in my mind.
“Then why do I feel like I’m abandoning her? I feel like I just left some helpless lamb out in the field for the wolves!”
“It was her choice Claire. You accepted her decision, and that meant a lot to her. Didn’t you feel it?” I shook my head. All I felt was my own self-loathing. He rested his cheek against the top of my head after depositing a small kiss there. “You’ve got to open yourself up. Stop fighting the emotions inside you. There’s a whole world out there and you’re blocking it all out.”
“Of course I’m blocking it out!” I screamed at him, pulling my body away from his embrace. “All there is in this world is pain! Why should I let myself feel that?”
His eyes grew sad. “You know that’s not true.” He tried to pull me to him again, but I refused. A sigh escaped his lips as he turned away from me. I watched him gaze out at the night sky as he swallowed hard. “You try so hard to protect yourself from being hurt. Are you that afraid of feeling all the good things in this world? All the love?”
I opened my mouth to argue, but then I realized he was right. I was terrified of losing those I cared about. So much so, that I was keeping them at arm’s length. I was refusing to allow myself to feel what I truly felt for them, and in doing so, the only emotion that seeped through was anger. Anger that I couldn’t be with the ones I loved. Anger that I couldn’t protect them, and anger that those I loved always left me.
“You’re right.” My words were breathy as they choked on my emotion. I finally understood my anger; the rage that I could never seem to contain. All this time it was me who was hurting me most.
Arrick turned, pain etched into his expression. “She loved you very much, Claire. She wasn’t choosing to stay behind because she didn’t want to go with you, but because she wanted to protect you. If you could only have felt the love she has for you… the love I have for you.”
My breath caught in my throat again and tears clung desperately to my lashes. I felt the love exuding from him like a warm heat that caressed my skin and warmed my soul. As much as I’d tried to say I cared about him, or that I thought I could feel, the same I was still holding back. My heart longed for him with a throbbing ache, but my mind lashed out.
“Should we get going?” Arrick asked.
He’d started the engine and put the car in gear before I’d even given him an answer. I knew I’d taken too long to answer, but what could I say? I knew that I kept going back and forth with him on my emotions. I knew my anger was getting out of control, but it was so hard to admit I was wrong. The only thing I could do was try to learn from those mistakes and move forward.
It was silly to have driven the few houses down the street that it took to get to Liz’s house, but I needed the privacy and the time to collect myself. Arrick was right, I had to try and allow myself to open up. No matter how afraid I was, I had to try. I might have thought I was protecting myself, but in reality I was causing more harm to everyone around me. That revelation, of course, made me feel worse about myself, but I was willing to accept the truth of it. I had become a walking, talking hypocrite. I would fight, bleed, and die for those I cared about; but I wasn’t willing to let them into my heart completely for fear of losing them. The more I thought about it, the more it didn’t make sense.
The keys jingled in the ignition as we rolled to a stop outside Liz’s house. It looked exactly as I remembered it; light blue with dazzling white shutters and a beautiful beveled glass front door. The dried flower wreath her mother bought at the farmers market during the spring still hung in place. A soft glow emanated from the curtained windows. I allowed my eyes to travel across the familiar building until they finally settled on Liz’s room. I had to prepare myself for the possibility that she might not want to come with me either. Maybe she hated me for leaving, maybe she was still hurt, or maybe she had moved on and found a new best friend. I’d prepare myself for the worst, but hope for the best. Either way, I was telling her the truth and I would do whatever I could to keep her safe.
“I’ll give you a few minutes,” Arrick said. The pain was gone from his eyes and a small smile lifted the corners of his lips. The connection between us tugged at my heart, and I grasped his hand in mine before I opened the door and walked up the steps.
It took me a few seconds to decide between knocking on the door, and ringing the doorbell. My hands were too unsteady so I pressed the button and heard the chime echo within. Liz’s mother called out for her to answer and I could hear Liz moan in response, which only made a smile light up my face. Her feet pounded on the stairs to let her mother know how putout she was, and then the door swung open.
We just stared at each other. She looked like she’d seen a ghost, and I waited with my breath held for her to say something, or slam the door in my face. She was exactly as I remembered her, not that she’d have changed in the months I’d been gone. Her blonde hair was in a long, curly pony tail, she was in her favorite pajamas, and her skin was fresh and clean. I always thought she looked prettier without makeup. She had been getting ready for bed. It was very late and I couldn’t help but wonder what she’d been up to.
“Claire?” Her eyebrows furrowed and her mouth fell open. “Wow, you hardly look like you anymore.”
“Hey.” I smiled at her, suddenly nervous. Her eyes widened in shock and I realized I’d flashed full-on fang at her. I slapped my hand across my mouth and looked away. Geez, I could be a real idiot sometimes.
“What are you doing here?” she asked. Her tone was simply curious, but the words cut through me like a knife. Those weren’t exactly the words I had been hoping to hear.
“I… I came to see you.” I rubbed my arms even though it wasn’t cold out. “Can I come in?”
“Uh… sure.” She stepped aside and I walked hesitantly into the living room. Her house was much the same layout as mine, just bigger. Liz’s mom opted for the extra rooms even though it was just the two of them. Memories of my childhood flooded my mind as I took a seat on the couch. The overabundance of decorative pillows gave me only a few inches of space, so I balanced myself on the edge as best I could.
“How are you?” My voice grew soft as I watched my childhood best friend take a seat in the armchair instead of beside me on the couch.
“I’m great.” She smiled with fake sincerity. I focused and allowed myself to reach out to her. I was surprised by what I found. Anger.
“You look great,” I said, and she really did. She always did. “I’m sorry I didn’t come see you sooner.”
“It’s whatever. I don’t care. You’ve got a new life now.”
She looked disinterested and turned her attention toward the expansive bay window that opened to the front yard. Her emotions were spilling out of her, filling the room like hot steam. She was angry and I couldn’t say I blamed her. Had our situations been reversed I’d be angry too. I just hoped she could forgive me.
“I care.” I scooted closer toward her and she didn’t move away. That was a good sign. “Just because things have changed, doesn’t mean I don’t want you in my life any more, Liz.”
“Yes, it does.” She turned to look at me, her pony tail draped over her shoulder like a luxurious mane. “What could we possibly have in common now? What is there to even say about anything?” The hurt in her eyes overshadowed the anger. “Am I supposed to be happy you came here to slum it with us simple humans?” Her arms crossed across her chest as she scowled at me.
“Liz.” I closed the gap between us. “Just because I’m different, doesn’t mean we have to be.”
She sighed, making her face look somber and defeated. “Yes, it does, Claire. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to see you, but what’s the point? You haven’t even so much as called! Not once.”
“I’m sorry.” She had a point. There was no excuse for that. I could have said the same to her, but there was no reason to shove it in her face. “I should have called. I should have done a lot of things that I didn’t, but I’m here now. Doesn’t that count?” I reached out to touch her, but thought better of it and knotted my fingers together in my lap.
“I get it. Your life is better now. You’re rich, powerful and beautiful. I’ve seen you on TV, Claire. You don’t look anything like the girl I grew up with.” Her eyes glistened with emotion and my heart hammered in my chest. I thought I had been able to retain a small part of the girl I once was, but maybe I was losing that battle. I knew I looked different on the outside, yet I always thought I still had some of the same teenage girl inside me. If Liz couldn’t see it, then maybe I was wrong.
“A lot has happened since I left, Liz. Nothing is like what I thought it would be.”
“What? Not enough parties and jewels for you?” She winced at her own words and I could feel her regret for saying them. She was just lashing out at me, and I knew I deserved it. I had been a terrible friend. “What do you want, Claire?”
Her words were dipped in softness, yet sadness burned at the seams. I’d hurt her, and for that I would do whatever I could to repair it. I had done the very thing I knew we both feared the most I abandoned her. I might have had no choice about leaving, but I didn’t take the time to call or even write. All I had to do was reach out to her, to let her know I hadn’t forgotten her and I didn’t even do that.
“I want you to come with me.” Shock painted her face, hiding all the sadness.
“Come with you?” I nodded. “Where? To the palace?”
“Not exactly.”
Glee bubbled inside me as hope spread across her face. Liz had always seemed the more independent one, the leader of our two-girl group, but she was more invested in our friendship than I had ever realized, and that made my heart swell with love. Arrick was right, if only I hadn’t kept myself closed up for so long I might not have felt so alone all my life.
“Well, where exactly?” Liz’s interest was piquing as she pulled her legs up to her chest to sit more comfortably on her chair as she hugged a pillow.
“To Naos. It’s a long story, but that’s where I live now.”
“Naos?” Her nose wrinkled as she tried to pronounce the foreign word on her tongue. “Where’s that?”
“It’s on the coast.” I said, settling back into the couch. The pillows were lumpy and uncomfortable, but the tension was breaking and I couldn’t be happier.
“Why do you live there? Because of what they said on the news?” She picked up the remote to flip on the television. Her favorite station flickered on, lighting up the living room in a flash of colors as a music video played. “They keep playing clips from the announcement.”
“Sort of.” I took a deep breath, dreading the conversation I knew was coming. I had to tell Liz the truth, I only hoped she’d come with me. It wasn’t safe for her here. Somewhere deep inside of me, I knew that the Noire region would be Baal’s first target.
Liz hugged the pillow in her arms like a life vest as I recounted the tale of my life as a vampire. Tears burned hot trails down her face when I painfully detailed Ana’s attack at the palace and the unspeakable violence of the assault by The Dark. I felt like I was forcing her to watch a scary movie as she sat, horrified by my every word.
“I don’t know what to say.” Liz had unfolded her limbs from the chair and was bouncing her feet on the floor. Her emotions buzzed with nervous energy. “Why doesn’t Nicolae just take all the vampires and go attack them?”
“Because… the dark vampires are very strong.”
“And that’s why you want me to come with you?” I nodded. “What makes Naos safer than here?”
“You can stay with me. I can watch over you and make sure you’re always protected.” I couldn’t hide the desperation in my tone. I wanted her to come to Naos so badly. “You’ll like it there, Liz. It’s beautiful.”
“What about your mom? I mean… Jacklyn, and my mom?”
“Jacklyn didn’t want to come. She said she wanted to stay behind and inspire more people to follow Nicolae; that he and the vampires needed the people’s support more than ever.” I tried to hide the disappointment in my voice. I understood Jacklyn’s reasons for staying, but they still burned like a fresh paper cut on my heart.
“Oh,” Liz exclaimed, sounding surprised. “I guess that makes sense. Ever since you left she’s been completely consumed with her work. Even more so than she ever was before.”
“Yeah…” Jacklyn was a subject I didn’t want to revisit. “Isn’t winter break coming up?”
“It’s next week. Why?”
“Tell your mom you’re going on vacation for the break with me. That’ll explain your absence and she won’t be worrying about you.”
Liz rolled her eyes. “Like she’d worry about me anyway.”
I squeezed her hand. “You know what I mean. She’s loves you, Liz. She’s just…” How could I put that her mother was a self-absorbed, gold-digger nicely?
“She has a new boyfriend; a real winner this one.” New anger fumed below the surface of her words as her eyes rolled dramatically. Liz’s mother’s boyfriends were nothing but trouble. She’d pick them up at bars or nightclubs; any guy that looked like he had some serious money. They’d have a whirlwind romance that would usually end up with the cops being called, and then Liz would stay with me for a couple weeks because she was pissed off at her mom. I was pissed off at her too. “She probably won’t even notice I’m gone.”
“That’s not true.” I don’t know why I was trying to play neutral when I knew Liz was probably right. She could tell her mother she was going to be a tree-hugger and live in the forest with the magical fairies, and her mother wouldn’t bat an eyelash. But, it was her mother, didn’t she deserve a warning too? I told my mom, it was only fair.
“And don’t even think about inviting her to come with,” Liz growled at me as if reading my mind.
“We have to at least tell her,” I pleaded with my best friend.
“What’s the point? She won’t believe us.” Liz shot up, throwing the pillow onto the chair behind her and headed to the kitchen.
I followed.
“Probably not, but we should at least warn her.” I watched Liz pop open a can of diet soda and gulp it down. She opened a second can and slid it across the counter to me. I caught it without taking my eyes off her.
Her eyes fell to the soda in my hand and then back to her own can. “Sorry, I forgot you don’t…”
“It’s okay.” I smiled at her. We used to always share a soda together when we were stressed about something. Although I had no desire to down the cool, bubbly contents; I wanted to, just for nostalgias sake.
She traced the rim of the can with her finger, the condensation dripping down to the countertop. “I’m glad you came back, Claire. I’m still pissed at you, but I’m glad you came back.” A genuine smile lit her face.
“Me too.” I smiled back at her, no longer afraid to let my fangs peek out between my lips.
“What’s it like?” She rounded the counter slowly, eyeing my fangs with amazement.
“It’s like… I’d been living my whole life with blurry vision, and didn’t even realize it until I was turned.” No one had ever asked me that before, but I felt that summed it up nicely. There were so many emotions, sounds and details in this world that humans were missing out on.
“Wow.” Liz and I were standing face to face as she eyed me curiously. Taking in every aspect of my new appearance. “You still look like you… mostly.” She smiled at me wryly, a hint of the old, wild Liz coming back.
“Gee… thanks.” I flicked her arm playfully.
“You do know that you’re going to have to tell me all the deets, right?”
“I thought I did.” I twirled the soda can between my fingers, spinning it on the counter as it glided across the condensation like an ice skater.
“I mean the good stuff.” She swallowed the last gulps of her soda. “Not the scary, evil vampires are going to kill us all stuff.”
“Oh! That stuff.” I giggled at her.
A gust of air blew into the kitchen as Arrick flew in like a ghost. “We should get going. It’ll be sunrise soon.” He smiled at me as I sensed him searching my emotions. I winked at him, letting him know he’d been right and that I felt loads better. From now on I’d let everyone in and be open to their feelings. The only anger I needed to feel would be focused solely on Baal.
“Whoa…” Liz’s mouth hung open as she gazed at Arrick who stood like a chiseled bulk of sexiness beside me.
“Hello, Elizabeth. It’s nice to finally meet you,” Arrick said, holding out his hand. He could be a total guy sometimes, but then he’d act like… well a prince for lack of a better word. He was so weird, but I loved it about him.
A snort burst out of me, and I slapped my hands across my mouth to stop the giggles from erupting, but I failed miserably. Liz’s eyes were practically bugging out of her head, and Arrick looked like a dignified gentlemen utterly confused by her reaction. It was completely comical.
Liz took his hand weakly, too flabbergasted to grasp it tightly. “This is Arrick?” She whispered to me like he wouldn’t hear.
“Yeah.” I wiped the happy tears from my eyes and sighed as I caught my breath. I bumped Arrick’s shoulder. “She hates being called Elizabeth by the way. It’s Liz.”
“Oh, I don’t mind.” Liz fluttered her eyelashes and flashed a dazzling smile at him. She popped her hip to the side, striking her usual pose. I knew this pose all too well; she’d tried teaching it to me once. She said it showed off a woman’s curves and drove men wild. She was no longer weakly holding his hand, so Arrick slid his fingers out of her grasp, like her touch made him uncomfortable. A trickle of nervousness eked out of him, and the expression on his face almost made me break out in laughter all over again. The immediate attraction Liz felt for him was obvious, it filled the room like the smell of sweet cotton candy, and it made Arrick tense. His eyes kept dodging her and searching for an escape. Was he scared I’d get jealous? I wasn’t even close to jealous; I thought it was hilarious to see him squirm.
“I guess I better get ready,” Liz said, without taking her eyes off Arrick. She smiled at him sweetly, her eyes drinking him in like a delicious cup of hot chocolate. He retreated, standing behind me, resting his hand on my shoulder. His desperation to show his connection with me warmed my heart, but still made laughter bubble in my belly.
“Pack up as fast as you can,” I ordered her.
She dashed up the staircase as Arrick and I took a seat in the living room to wait for her return. “Make sure you tell your mom!” I called out after her, not sure if she’d actually do it or not.
“You seem happier,” Arrick commented as he locked eyes with me.
“And you seem nervous.” I winked and wiggled my eyebrows suggestively.
“I… I… I have no intentions to…” he pointed to the second floor of Liz’s house as if pointing at her directly, stumbling through his words like a panicky school boy. A small laugh popped from my lips like bubble gum.
“Calm down.” I pushed his hand back down and held it in mine. “I’m just teasing you. I’ve just never seen you act like this before.”
“I’ve never seen anyone act like her before.”
“You can’t tell me that every human girl you’ve ever met hasn’t fawned over you in the exact same way.”
“Not to that extreme.” He sighed, letting his stiff posture finally rest against the back of the couch.
I waved it off. “Liz has always had a flare for the dramatic. Besides, she has had a thing for vampires since we were kids. You should see all the posters on her bedroom walls. It’s like a shrine for every hot, eligible vampire in our entire region.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.” He grimaced at me. “I just don’t want you to think that…”
“I would never think that.” I twined our fingers together and pushed my newfound positive emotions into him. It was nice feeling happy and letting go of my anger. I knew it wouldn’t last forever, but I could at least enjoy it while I could. I knew Arrick would never do anything to betray me, and neither would Liz. Sure, she’d flirt like a professional until the end of time, but that’s all it would ever be. She’d never do anything to spoil our friendship. Besides, as soon as we got back to the palace she’d have more than enough vampires to keep her eyes off Arrick. That thought brought a smile to my lips. I wondered which would catch her eye most.
To my surprise it only took Liz thirty minutes to stuff four designer suitcases, and two shoulder bags. She’d also managed to throw on some seriously short shorts, and an oh-so-low cut pink blouse. Normally I’d make a comment about her attire; tell her she was overdressed, or that she’d give guys the wrong impression, but not now. I had a completely different view of the human body and what was beautiful or too risqué. Sure, Liz would have looked stunning in jeans and a knit sweater, she didn’t need to be so revealing but it was her personality. If she liked to show off her flesh, more power to her, although it would hold a whole different meaning where we were headed than it ever had before. Maybe I should warn her.
“All set?” I asked when Liz dumped the last of her bags by the front door. Arrick had already stepped out, popped the trunk with the gadget on the key ring and was prepared to load her things. Perhaps it was the fact that sunrise was only a couple hours away, or did he want to keep himself busy so he wouldn’t notice Liz drooling over him?
“Pretty much.” She spun around with her hands on her hips, looking at her bags like she had x-ray vision. “If I forget anything I’ll just borrow it from you.” Her eyes sparkled with mischievousness.
“Since when have you ever wanted to borrow anything from me?” I asked, leaning against the banister while Arrick grasped the last two bags and carried them to the trunk. His muscles didn’t strain in the slightest even though I’m sure those cases were pushing one-hundred pounds.
“Good point!” Liz winked at me as she headed for the door.
“Wait a second.” I grabbed her hand and pulled her back in. “Did you talk to your mom?” I bit my tongue, hating how much I was sounding like a mother myself. Liz was eighteen and technically she could do whatever she wanted to, with or without her mother’s permission. I just wanted to avoid causing any more chaos than there already was in my life.
“I tried.” She groaned, folding her arms across her chest and pouted.
“And?” I attempted pulling more information out of her. She hated talking about her mother unless it involved something she’d just bought in an attempt to buy her daughter’s affections or get back into Liz’s good graces. Sadly, that tactic always seemed to do the trick.
“She and her boy-toy are going on vacation. She was more than happy to hear that I’d be your problem while they’re gone.”
“She didn’t say it like that, did she?” Liz’s mom might not have been mother of the year, but she definitely wasn’t mean. Unless, of course, this was new behavior inspired by this new “love” interest.
“She got the point across… let’s just leave it at that.”
Liz brushed passed me and walked out the front door without looking back. Had things really been that bad for her here since I’d left, or had they always been like that? Maybe I was always too wrapped up in my own problems and loneliness that I never saw it. Again, just another prime example of me not focusing on the feelings of those around me.
I stepped out into the predawn night and, with one sad gaze behind me, I shut the door to Liz’s house. I might not ever come back to this house again, or even mine. To be honest, I may very well never see this city again. I had no clue what the future had in store for me, but if the past was any evidence then I had many dark days ahead. In some small way I felt like I was locking up a bit of the Claire I used to be, the little pieces that I clung to as if they were keeping me from turning into something else. Something dark.
The back door sat open for me, and I slid in beside Liz. She’d already ordered Arrick to turn on the radio, and one of her favorite tunes was blaring through the speakers. I was exhausted, but somehow the thumping of the beat drowned out my thoughts and allowed me to just enjoy the moment. My best friend was coming with me to Naos, and I wouldn’t have to worry about her safety. Even though Naos had been attacked, it still felt like the safest place in the world to me. Maybe because my real family was there, or maybe because it was the only place I’d ever felt like I truly belonged. Either way, I’d be able to keep a watchful eye on her and everyone else I cared about.
I couldn’t remember the last time I listened to music. Liz and I sang off key at the top of our lungs on the ride back to the palace. She might have been wild, outspoken and a bit dramatic, but that was everything I loved about Liz. She ripped apart my buttoned-up attitude, and to put it as she would; she made sure I didn’t get my panties in a wad. That was her favorite term, not mine, but she did have a point. I rarely let loose, but with Liz around it would be hard not to.
Arrick’s eyes captured mine the whole ride home. Every time I caught him glancing at me through the rear view mirror I blushed with embarrassment. He winked, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel as he kept with the beat. I felt so incredibly normal it was almost intoxicating. We were just three people, driving in a car and listening to music. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d done anything so normal.
I was relieved to see that there weren’t any news vans or reporters in sight when we pulled through the gates of the palace. It was nearly dawn and everyone was getting ready to sleep. I was fighting the urge in order to stay awake myself. The high of reconnecting with Liz had faded and we all sat in comfortable, yet exhausted silence as Arrick clicked open the garage door and we pulled in.
Nearly all the cars that had once filled the expansive space were now gone. Yet, the smell of grease and rubber still filled the air. It was mixed with fresh paint and cut wood. The repairs from the damage that happened on the night I had left the palace, the night Ana tried to kill me, were just being finished. It would take a lot longer to repair what Baal and his monsters had destroyed.
“Come on.” I latched onto Liz’s hand and pulled her out of the car. “Let me show you my room.” When I first came here I dreamed about showing Liz around and sharing this amazing new world I’d entered. Now that dream was a hazy shadow of what it once was.
Smoke still clung to the air as we made our way through the halls, and although each day the palace was leagues cleaner than the one before it, there was still a long way to go. Liz didn’t seem to notice it, or maybe she didn’t care. Either way, she didn’t say anything. There was no point worrying about it anyway, we wouldn’t be staying here for long.
“Damn! This place is even more amazing in person than it is on television.”
Liz skipped ahead of me, stopping to look at a piece of artwork or smell the flowers the servants had just begun to place in vases like they used to. I sniffed the air and allowed their delicate scent to replace the smell of the carnage that evil had left behind. A whiff of Liz’s fresh perfume filled my senses and eased me farther away from the nightmarish memories that were trying to break through.
“It’s even better when it’s not under construction.” I flicked my fingers across a tarp that was draped over an expanse of wall. Ladders, workbenches, buckets of paint and all manner of tools lined the hallways as we made our way up the back staircase to my floor.
“What is that?” Liz squealed, tapping the glass of a large window.
“That’s the palace gardens.” I smiled at the memories I had there; walking with Arrick that first night after our Blood Mate ceremony and my favorite bench on the edge of the pond. “Seems to be the only thing that wasn’t destroyed during the attack.”
“It’s beautiful.” Her voice grew softer as a yawn escaped. “Can we go there?”
“Sure, just not tonight.” As much as I’d like to walk amongst the fragrant flowers and sit at the bench under the ancient tree that overlooked the pond, I wasn’t going to. I would take Liz to the gardens in Naos. They were just as beautiful.
“Can I at least stay with you tonight?”
“Duh!” I winked at her. “Of course you will. My bed is big enough for four people.”
“That should be enough space for you to roll around like a maniac, and hopefully not kick me in your sleep?” She raised her eyebrows at me. I was a notorious fidgety sleeper.
“I won’t kick you,” I raised my right hand, “I promise.”
The sight of my closet roused Liz from her sleepy state. She was like a kid in a candy store. I told her to take what she wanted as I threw on an oversized shirt and dropped myself into bed. She dashed in and out of the closet asking what I thought of a certain outfit and I’d mumble that she looked amazing until sleep finally claimed me. Louie curled up at my feet and purred madly. Maybe having Liz around was good for him too; a familiar face was always comforting.