chapter 4
When I come to, I’m lying on the concrete at the edge of pool, turned on my side. I gasp for air. I cough and cough and the chlorinated water burns my throat on its way up. I look up and see Will – soaking wet – shove Kane hard, knocking him back several steps. “What the f*ck is wrong with you?” he yells.
“I was testing her – just like you would have done,” Kane answers, though suddenly not so certain.
“No! Not like I would have done.” Will shoves him again. My heart pounds, and I lift up on my elbow to watch. “O’Donovan wants her alive,” Will says to him.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t think there’d be any harm,” Kane adds, his voice shaking.
“Get out of here.” Will’s voice is angry, commanding, and Kane doesn’t argue.
I hear Kane’s heavy footsteps as he leaves through the gymnasium, but I don’t sit up until I hear the door click behind him.
Will stands over me. “You all right?” He reaches one hand out toward me.
I nod and take it, and he hauls me to my feet. I know not to trust him, that he didn’t save me to be chivalrous, but after my near drowning, my brain is confused.
When I stand, my knees tremble and I falter, but Will slips his arm around my waist, holding me steady.
“Think you can make it down the hall?”
I nod again, not trusting my voice. My throat’s still raw from coughing.
He holds onto me for a few seconds more to be sure, then drops his arm. We leave the gymnasium, and he leads me down the hall. It feels strangely civilized to walk behind him, just following him, rather than having someone push me ahead blindly so they can keep me in their sights. I could turn and run right now – but honestly, where would I go? Every room here is locked down. I size him up, wondering how hard it’d be to overtake him. Impossible, I quickly decide. He’s at least a head taller than me – well over six feet, and his entire body is solid and lean with muscle.
My feet squish in my shoes, and I leave a dripping trail through the hall. I wonder where he’s taking me.
He scans into a door and holds it open for me. I walk in ahead of him. It’s some type of common room – there are couches and tables and people around my age hanging out. It seems so normal, and that makes it seem completely impossible.
“Welcome to the bunker.” Before I have the chance to ask him what the bunker is, he speaks again. “Hey, Sam.”
A girl playing cards in the corner of the room picks up her head and looks over at us. She sits up straighter when she notices Will. He tilts his head, motioning her over to us, and she gets up from the table, folding her cards in front of her.
Sam is several inches taller than me and much more solidly built. Golden hair falls like a curtain down her back, and her face is open and friendly.
“This is Eve. Will you get her something dry to wear and something to eat?”
“Is she with us now?” Sam asks, studying me in disbelief. It’s obvious I’m no guard.
“We’ll see.”
Sam nods and sticks her hand out to me. “Hey.”
I shake it weakly. “Hey,” I manage. My voice croaks, despite my best effort.
“You’re all wet,” she says.
“Yeah, Kane’s an idiot,” Will says, by way of explanation. “Call me when you’re through, and I’ll come back and get her.” He turns and leaves. The moment the door shuts behind him, the people around us begin talking and playing cards once again.
“So who are you?” Sam asks, looking me over. “And why has Will taken a special interest in you?” A smirk plays on her lips.
“I’m … nobody. One of O’Donovan’s side projects, that’s all.”
She nods once. “Okay, come on. I think we can find something that fits you.”
I follow Sam into a dormitory that’s connected to the bunker. It’s dim in here, with moonlight peeking into the room through the high up windows. All the beds are dressed in white sheets, just like in the hospital. Only here the beds don’t have shackles. I haven’t noticed before now, but the promise of dry clothes reminds me that I’m shivering. My teeth chatter while I wait for her to locate something for me to wear. “So what is this place?” I ask.
She rummages through a locker, pulling out stray articles and holding them up to inspect. “Several years ago, the officials decided Defects could be used for something more – their dirty work. We’re not Sleepers, after all.” She finally settles on a pair of cargo pants and a hooded sweatshirt and tosses them to me. I’m growing used to the lack of underpants here, and thank goodness – for once – that things up top don’t exactly require a bra.
I strip down and change quickly in front of her, long past caring about modesty. I leave my wet clothes in a heap beside her bed, along with the towel she let me use.
She turns to leave the room, then stops suddenly just before we reach the door. “Wait.” She goes back to her locker and comes back with a comb. She holds it up and smiles. I smile back, but it feels lopsided, like I’m out of practice. “Sit.” She points me towards the nearest bed, and I comply.
She begins at the ends of my hair and combs it out, working through the snarls and tangles until my hair is smooth and hangs straight down my back. Her kindness overwhelms me, but I stay quiet. Then I feel her fingers work to separate my hair into three equal sections and she begins braiding it. When she reaches the bottom, she tugs an elastic band from her wrist with her teeth and secures it around the bottom of my braid.
I feel human again, dressed in clothes rather than a hospital gown or scrubs, with my hair neatly secured back from my face.
Next Sam brings me into a large, sterile kitchen and rummages through the stainless steel double-door refrigerator. “We already had dinner, so it’ll just be whatever’s left.”
My encounter with her has already been more than I was expecting.
She produces a thick slice of ham, a hunk of cheese and grabs some bread from the counter. She assembles the sandwich while I stand there, my mouth watering.
When she pushes it towards me, I hesitate, but only for a second. I’m again overcome by her kindness, but then remember that she’s under orders from Will – that is all. She hands me the sandwich, and for the first time, I notice the numbers tattooed at her wrist. 5486. So she’s a Defect, just like me.
I grab for the sandwich and take a big bite into it. I haven’t had meat or really anything of substance since I’ve been here – over two weeks now – and with today’s mental and physical exertion, I’m starved in a way I didn’t know was possible.
“So, what are you in for?” She smiles.
I don’t know how honest to be, though something tells me I can trust her. It’s just that after my incident where I admitted to Willow about failing the mindscan – I’m not so sure now. But I’m not good at lying, especially since it would require coming up with something on the spot. I swallow the bite I’ve been chewing. “I actually don’t know – they said I failed the mindscan.”
She looks taken aback, and it’s clear she’s never heard of that happening. “Hm.”
“Yeah, I know – that’s why they’re trying to figure out what’s going on with me. I had tests all afternoon.”
She nods, looking concerned.
“Do you know Kane?” I’m almost afraid to ask, but the look on her face sets me at ease once again.
“Yeah. He’s one of the instructors for new recruits. You have to be careful around him.”
I nod. I know that firsthand.
“If you act too tough, he’ll put you in your place. But if you act too weak, that’ll just piss him off, and he’ll use you to prove a point.”
So maybe neither strategy would have worked with him today. And it’s not like I could have escaped his notice, being one-on-one with him this afternoon. “Yeah, I figured that out.”
She turns serious for a moment. “Don’t be mad at Kane though; where do you think he gets his orders?”
I shrug.
“Will and O’Donovan.”
“So you’re going to become a guard?” I ask, changing the subject.
“Yeah. They take those who are strong and train us to become compound patrol guards. Essentially making us do the dirty jobs for the military. After training, we live here, but we work in different posts all around the city, mostly fence patrol.”
I nod. I think of the uniformed guards marching along the fence. It always made me feel safe, knowing that they were keeping the Radicals out. Now I’m starting to wonder if their sole purpose was keeping us in. “Is it as bad as it seems? I mean, what’s it like in here?”
She looks around, confirming we’re alone before she answers. “It’s not as bad as you might think. We train here for one year. It’s hard during the day, but our nights are free. Once they say we’re finished– we’re assigned a position in the compound.”
I finish the sandwich while she watches. She brings me a cup of water. I sense that she’s stalling before calling Will, and I’m grateful once again.
“How are you holding up in Ward A?”
I take a sip of water, which soothes my throat, and then down the rest in one gulp. Sam takes it to the sink to refill. “Not great.” I don’t meet her eyes. I’m suddenly filled with emotion at having such a normal conversation with a girl my age, who seems to understand what I’m going through.
“You should try to get transferred over here and become one of us,” she says, though she won’t meet my eyes. I can tell she believes it would be a long shot – my slight physical build, my height, none of it makes me a suitable guard.
“Yeah,” I agree weakly.
Once it’s clear I’m through, we stare at each other a few minutes longer, and she shifts uneasily. I can tell she won’t risk keeping me here, not wanting to get in trouble with Will. And I don’t blame her.
We go back to the bunker, and Sam calls Will over the intercom while I sink down into the sofa to wait. She goes back to join the game of cards she left. A few minutes later, Will enters the door to the bunker again. Being off my feet for the first time in hours has made me realize how tired I am. I blink slowly, taking in the sight of him. He’s looking straight at me, watching me like I’m a real person and not a criminal. He walks closer.
“I have to take you back now.”
I nod and stand up – the height difference between us is exaggerated with him this close. My head doesn’t even clear his chin. He steps back, as if realizing for the first time how close we’re standing. He nods once toward Sam, thanking her silently. He turns for the door, confident that I’ll follow him back to the hospital wing. Which, of course I do.