chapter 1
Three and a half years later...
Pitting oneself against a drug lord definitely had its downsides, Tony Cooper thought as he sat in his car in front of the Sacramento County Courthouse, watching for any sign of his ex, Linda Delaney.
The first time he’d challenged Mark Guapo, he’d still been reeling from his breakup with Linda some eighteen months before and hoping that by narking on his former drug supplier, he might be able to win her back. The downside? Six months after that, Linda had been lying in a hospital bed, recovering from the wounds that Guapo’s men had inflicted on her, and he’d been forced to leave her and accompany his sister Mattie and his niece Jordan into the Witness Security Program.
Now, eighteen months later, he was back, this time to infiltrate Guapo’s organization—which despite the other man’s prison address, had been steadily expanding—and convince people he was taking over. His main objective? Identify the supplier of a dangerous hybrid bath-salt drug, Rapture. The downside? Too many to list, but the biggest was making sure Linda stayed safe this time and that meant staying the hell away from her.
Yet here he was, hoping for just one glimpse of her. One glimpse to replace his last memory of her, beaten and bruised. One glance to get him through the next few weeks, months and years without her. Then he’d start his car and leave. No one would guess he was here to see her.
Just in case, however, he visually swept the surrounding area, just as he’d done every few minutes for the past half hour.
No one appeared to be watching him, but he knew what they’d see if they were.
What Linda would see.
Would she even recognize him? Sometimes he didn’t even recognize himself.
Every detail of his appearance had been chosen with care. Gone was the curly brown hair that had made him look boyish even when he’d been breaking the law. In its place was a shaved head that showed off his eyebrow piercing to its best advantage. The scars on his face, the ones left over from the beatings Michael Sabon, Guapo’s brother, had given him, added to the overall look, declaring him to be a badass to the nth degree.
But he didn’t feel like one.
He felt like the weakling he was. The same weakling who’d gotten addicted to prescription painkillers in the first place, ultimately losing the love of his life as a result. The same weakling Linda hadn’t trusted to refrain from using again.
To some extent she’d been wrong. Just as he’d told her, he hadn’t used since before he’d met her, which meant he’d been clean for over five years now. Even so, there had been several close calls, including the night she’d caught him with those damn pills. And there were still plenty of times he doubted his ability to stay clean. Plenty of times his behavior had been affected by his cravings. Plenty of times he felt a hair’s breath away from saying to hell with it and giving in.
That was yet another reason to stay away from Linda. Even if physical danger from others wasn’t a factor, she’d already made her decision about him. In the end, it hadn’t mattered that he’d helped send Guapo to prison. Hell, it probably wouldn’t even matter that he’d joined the police academy soon after he and Linda had broken up. Why would it? Just months away from graduating, he’d been too weak to protect Linda or his sister. Guapo’s men had beat Linda into a coma and his sister had almost died. Tony had failed everyone he loved.
Again.
Once an addict, always an addict.
And for Linda Delaney, an addict wasn’t good enough.
Tony again scanned the street.
His pulse accelerated as he finally spotted her, exiting the courthouse’s main entrance. Automatically he stiffened and pain zipped across his back and down his leg. He barely felt it past the mixed joy and longing that squeezed his heart.
As he watched, Linda sat on a bench outside the courthouse and ate a sandwich, watching the antics of a pair of squirrels warring over someone’s littered potato chips. It reminded him of the days they’d spent at the local pet store, playfully arguing about what kind of animal they’d adopt someday. He’d wanted a dog. She’d wanted a cat. She’d argued a cat would be less work. They’d ended up getting neither, and it hadn’t occurred to Tony until after they’d broken up why Linda would want an animal that was less work to care for—because Tony had been too much work for her as it was.
But that wasn’t fair, he thought, willing away the slight taste of bitterness in his mouth. Linda was a busy woman. A successful woman. Just because she hadn’t wanted to be tied down to an addict for the rest of her life didn’t mean she hadn’t given their relationship a fair shot. She had. She’d made him happy. And for a time he’d made her happy, too.
With him out of her life, she appeared to be happy again. Healthy. Safe.
She looked good. More like she had when he’d first met her. By the end their relationship had taken a toll on her. She’d lost weight, the light in her beautiful green eyes had dimmed, and worry lines had etched themselves into her skin. That seemed far behind her now. Her blond hair was long and silky. Her body curvy beneath her crisp tailored suit. Her features relaxed and so sweetly familiar that he could almost forget the pain and the years that separated them...
Then a polished, dark-haired man in a suit approached her, causing Linda to smile and Tony to frown. The guy was obviously an attorney, too, dressed in a finely tailored suit with a damned vest and shined shoes. He sat down next to her and handed her something. Their interaction was perfectly respectable, but Tony could tell the man’s interest in Linda was far more than professional.
Sweat beaded Tony’s forehead and he held his breath. He’d been hoping to see her and he’d been expecting to long for her, but he hadn’t expected to see her with another man.
Then another man, this time a blond, stopped to talk to her. He, too, was probably a lawyer given how he was dressed. This man, however, Linda didn’t seem to like. Even from across the street Tony saw her smile stiffen and wane. Before it could disappear completely, the blond guy pointed his finger like a gun, cocked it at Linda, then left. Linda immediately shook her head. In response, her dark-haired friend bent his head close to hers, placed his hand on her thigh, and said something that made her laugh.
Jealousy overwhelmed him, making him tremble. A faint buzzing sound filled the car and he vaguely wondered if he was losing it. But then he realized his cell phone was vibrating. With a shaky hand he forced his gaze away from Linda, pulled his phone out of his pocket and saw the number on the screen.
It was Justine, the woman helping him make connections inside Guapo’s organization. She’d once dated Guapo’s defense attorney, Grant Falcon; Guapo’s men had killed him after Guapo had been convicted. Now she was dating another key man in Guapo’s organization, Nicco Santos. The man was likely a key component to taking over Guapo’s enterprise. He knew things he hadn’t told Justine or Tony yet, and Tony was hoping one of those things was the identity of Guapo’s Rapture supplier.
He snapped the phone to his ear. “What is it, Justine?”
“Tony!”
He frowned at the note of hysteria in her voice.
“Guapo won his appeal. He’ll be out on the streets in the next twenty-four hours and he’s going to find out what you’ve been doing. What we’ve been doing. He probably already knows.”
Guapo was getting out of prison? What the hell? Tony’s shaking hands went cold. “Does Nicco know?”
“He’s the one who told me. He’s scared out of his mind. And you know what that means. He’s going to give you up. He’s going to give both of us up.”
“Calm down, Justine. Did you try to get the name of the supplier from Nicco again?”
Justine took an audible breath, then said, “He still says he doesn’t know. That Guapo’s going to take the name to his grave.”
How ironic that the tables had turned. At one time Guapo had been desperate to find out the name of the confidential informant who’d sold him out. Now that same informant was just as desperate to get the name of the man only Guapo seemed to know. Sacramento’s main supplier of Rapture to kids and soccer moms. The man responsible for killing Rory Maverick, Justine’s little brother.
Tony shot another glance at Linda. She was still smiling. The guy beside her reached up, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. Swiftly Tony looked away.
It didn’t matter. He could still see them together.
He pictured them dancing the way he and Linda had danced. Making love the way he and Linda had made love. Spending their lives together and having a family and building a future together...the way he and Linda never would.
He had no place in her life. Not anymore. Hadn’t he just been telling himself that?
Gritting his teeth, he just managed to hang on to his control.
I can’t lose it. Not now. I have too much to do.
“Tell Nicco to trust me,” Tony told Justine. “And remind him that I’ve been a much more generous boss than Guapo ever was. I’ll be there in five.”