“Debate team?” Elijah scoffed. He seemed to catch himself. “Forget I said anything.”
She glared at him, but she wasn’t really mad. It almost made her smile, how Elijah could so easily let his prejudice against rich kids get to him.
He was still rubbing her back as she spoke, and their hips were touching. She knew that it should bother her, but it didn’t. Somehow, his closeness was actually helping her feel safe enough to tell the story.
“I wasn’t expecting to hear from him or see him,” she continued. “We hadn’t gotten that serious yet. So when he texted me, I almost—almost said no.” She closed her eyes tightly. “God, I wish I’d listened to my instinct.”
Elijah was watching her intently. “It’s not your fault,” he said.
It might have been cliché, Caelyn thought, but the conviction in his voice made it feel real and truthful.
“You’re right,” she said. “But I still wish I’d listened to myself.” She took a deep breath and let it out. Now she was getting to the scary part, and her stomach was getting tight, burning a little as she geared up to remember the worst. “Obviously, I said yes. I got dressed up in my very cutest, sexiest outfit and I went to his apartment. I don’t know what I was expecting. I was ready to hook up with him,” she said. “But I don’t think I had any intention of going all the way. I mean, he was only the second person I slept with—”
“You didn’t sleep with him,” Elijah interrupted. “He assaulted you.”
She nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I know.” She wiped at her eyes. “Anyway, when I got inside his apartment, I was surprised by how it looked. It was a nice, big place, off-campus. But it was messy. There were beer bottles and beer cans all over the place, a pizza box open on the coffee table in the living room. It kind of smelled.”
Elijah laughed at that. “Figures.”
“Jayson asked me if I wanted to hang out and watch a movie. I said sure, even though little alarm bells had started going off in my head. They were distant alarm bells, but something just felt—off. I could tell he’d been drinking, for one thing. He smelled like beer, and his hair was kind of messed up.” She thought about it. “But it was more than that. His whole vibe was just wrong. He was looking at me differently—looking at me like I was his prey or something.”
Elijah’s jaw was flexing again, which she knew was something he did when he was getting upset. It touched her a little that he was so worked up on account of her.
“You don’t have to tell me it all if you don’t want to,” Elijah said.
“No, I want to. Maybe I need to, even. If I don’t tell someone, I think I might go crazy.”
“I’m listening.”
“We were just sitting and watching some dumb movie. Transformers or something—maybe it was the second one. I couldn’t focus. I ate some pizza and tried to make small talk, but Jayson was being strange. Quiet. He started telling me how good I looked, how much he liked my skirt. I said thanks, tried to make a joke. I ate more pizza, thinking it would keep him from trying to kiss me. I was starting to plan excuses for leaving. And then, he put his arm over my shoulder and hugged me really, really tightly to him. I could feel how strong he was. Jayson is a big guy, and I was surprised at how hard he was holding me. I told him he was hurting me and he just laughed and said that he just liked me a lot. And then it really started. He wouldn’t let me go, and he was just holding me, kissing me a little. I didn’t want to kiss him back, but I was afraid.
So at first, I did kiss him a little bit, thinking it might slow him down. Only the exact opposite happened. He put his weight on me and pushed me back onto the couch, and then he started groping me, putting his hands all over me. Finally, I got scared and said I wanted to stop. He ignored me. I said it louder and then he got really rough. He ripped my panties off and put his fingers right into me. I was crying, telling him to stop, and he told me not to fight it…and then he eventually just stopped responding.”
She realized she was shaking violently now, as if it was happening again, this very instant.
Elijah looked slightly alarmed. “Caelyn, relax,” he said. “Relax. No one’s going to hurt you again.”
“How do you know?” she said, her voice almost a whisper.
“Because, I’ll kill anyone who tries.”
She nodded, still shaking violently. “Thank you for saying that.”
“Is it bothering you that I’m sitting so close right now?”
She looked into his eyes and shook her head. “No. I know you wouldn’t ever hurt me.”
He smiled a little, but then his smile faded. “Tell me the rest. I can take it.”