“You look like a sprite,” he said.
“Is that good or bad?” she asked.
“Frustrating,” he replied. And then he had a thought. “Why don’t you go run and hide and let me find you. I’ll have a present for you when I do.”
“Seriously? You want me to go run off naked and hide?”
He nodded.
“You’re the weirdest guy I know,” she laughed.
“I know. Now get going, you little sprite.” He turned her around and popped her bottom.
“Oh my God!” she squealed and took off down the hall.
Mark walked to the kitchen and poured their champagne. He left the glasses on the coffee table. Then he went on the hunt.
“What’s up with you lately?” Cadence asked, lying sprawled on the couch.
Oliver sat at the end, every now and then trying to push his sister’s feet off his knees.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“The ‘tude. You’ve got a ‘tude going on. It’s not like you,” she replied.
Oliver shrugged. “I don’t have a ‘tude,” he mumbled.
Cadence grinned and scratched the top of her head.
“Seriously, Ollie?”
Oliver looked like his words were itching to burst forth, but he didn’t want to bring up bad times. He thought it wouldn’t be good for his sister—her emotional state. He had no idea why he thought she was so delicate right now. She’d run away. She’d stood up to Dad. She was paying taxes.
She was growing up.
“Ollie?”
“I think God’s an asshole!” he blurted.
“OLLIE!” Cadence punched his stomach with her foot.
“Ouch! That hurt, Cay!”
“What the hell?”
Oliver rubbed his stomach.
“He’d have to be for what happened to you,” he argued.
Cadence rolled her eyes. “He didn’t punch me in the eye. Dad did.”
“But he allowed it to happen.”
“Oh my God,” Cadence muttered.
“What?”
“That’s, like, everyone’s go-to line when shit goes wrong in their lives. ‘God didn’t have to allow this to happen to me.’ Grow the fuck up, Ollie.”
Cadence paused, thinking of Avery—that afternoon not long ago when the girls sat at lunch discussing the classroom closet incident. Avery had told her to grow up. Just like that: “Grow the fuck up.” Now, in this moment, she ached for her friend.
“Well, it’s true. He’s supposed to be God, you know. All powerful. All knowing,” Oliver said.
Cadence drew in a patient breath.
“It’s so good you have me in your life,” she began, and Oliver smacked her shin playfully. “If life was perfect, and evil didn’t exist, and everyone was happy all the time, what would be the point of faith?”
Oliver furrowed his brows. “I’m not following.”
“Who needs to trust in God’s mercy and love if their lives are perfect?”
Oliver sat silent for a moment.
“So he punishes us to make us trust him and love him? That’s twisted.”
“He’s not punishing us. God is goodness. Okay? He can’t do wrong. That runs counter to his nature. See? So why do you think God punched me in the eye?”
Oliver shrugged. “He let it happen.”
“Yes. I think he’s given humans free will, Oliver. That’s my point. Free will to go around killing and raping and robbing and lying and hitting their daughters in the eye.”
“Why?”
Cadence paused. “I think for freedom’s sake. For choice.”
“Yeah, but why? He clearly sees how messed up this all is. Why not just torch the earth and be done with it already?”
“Well, that’s a good point.”
Oliver smiled smugly. Cadence saw.
“But I have an answer for you,” she said.
He grunted.
“He loves us, and he wants us to trust in his goodness.”
“Fuck that,” Oliver replied.
“You wanna be a robot instead? You wanna be forced to love God? ‘Cause he could have made that happen, but he’s got no time for that. That’s not the kind of relationship he wants with you. That’s not a relationship anyway. That’s coercion. And you don’t have time for that kind of bullshit either.”
Oliver considered this.
“I’m on the fence,” he said.
“Okay. Well you go be on the fence for a while. Just don’t let the bitterness start setting in.”
Oliver shot Cadence a dirty look.
“I’m not bitter. I’m pissed.”
She stared at her brother. “I get it,” she said softly. “I do.”
“Why aren’t you pissed at God?”
Cadence shrugged. “I was. For a while. But then I remembered he helped me escape. How can I be mad at God when he helped us move my getaway car, you know?”
Oliver thought for a moment. “Hmmm. Okay, I see that.”
A knock sounded at the door, and Oliver jumped up.
“Shouldn’t I answer?” Cadence asked.
“No worries,” he replied, opening the door. He scowled, looking the visitor up and down like she was smelly trash he forgot to leave on the curb. “What do you want?” He stood in the doorway barring her entry.
“Get outta my way, Oliver,” Avery said.
“No. Not ‘til you tell me what you want.”
“Isn’t it obvious? I’m here to see Cadence,” she replied patiently.
“Why?”
“To talk to her about things that aren’t your business.”
Oliver grunted. “You’ve been really mean to her.”