The doorbell rang and I stopped at a mirror in the hallway double check my appearance. I wanted no evidence of tears while she was here. Taking in my reflection, I noticed the slight puffiness but I could easily blame that on lack of sleep. Shaking my hands, I ran them through my messy hair before opening up my front door. "Merry Christmas!" I greeted, in a fake voice.
Tessa's bubbly face lit up. "Merry Christmas to you, too,” she said, hugging me. "God, it seriously feels like we haven't seen each other in forever." The last time I saw her was at the hospital a few weeks ago, but since then, we’d talked on the phone a few times.
"I know," I agreed. "Come on, I have a surprise for you.” I grabbed her hand and marched us down the hallway into the kitchen.
"Whoo, you know how much I love surprises.” We were both trying too hard. Our friendly banter just seemed too … forced.
She smiled when we reached the kitchen. "Gingerbread houses!" She squealed, grabbing one of the boxes and jumping up. Every year, since we were tiny tots, Tessa had always come over and we would decorate gingerbread houses together. As much as I wanted to hide under my blankets until the holidays were over, I had to do something special for her to make up for my sucky bestfriendism.
She pulled out a chair, sat down and started opening up the box. "How have you been?" I asked, grabbing our mugs and holding one out to her.
"Good," she muttered, taking the mug. "Better."
"You look better.” I wasn't lying, either. Her blonde hair was back in its long, loose curls and she looked like she was actually eating again.
"Thanks," she smiled. "I can't believe I even let myself get that way. Ugh, it was so embarrassing."
"We all had our own ways to cope with losing him," I reminded her, breaking apart my walls and roof. Okay, Dr. Daisy, I probably needed to learn how to take my own advice sometimes.
"Yeah, but mine was stupid," she replied, taking a small sip of the cocoa. "Dawson has been forcing me to go to therapy and I mean, literally forcing. The pain in my ass comes up to my room, drags me out of bed and drives me to my appointment."
"Seriously?" I asked, eyeing her warily. Dawson? Since when did they get so close?
Her hand went up. "That's not even the worst of it. When we get there, he actually sits in the waiting room until I'm finished to make sure I don't leave." She shook her head but I caught the smile on her face. "It's definitely helping, though. I even convinced my parents to come to a session with me, which was huge." Her eyes got big at the last word.
"I'm happy for you, Tess," I said. "Is there something going on with you and Dawson?"
"No way," she said, unable to look me in the eye.
"Shut it, skanker. I want the truth and nothing but the truth," I demanded, laughing. The old Daisy and Tessa was surfacing and I loved it.
"Ugh, I don't even know if there is something going on between the two of us. It's just so weird." She sighed. "You pushed me away because all I did was remind you of Tanner and he won't stay the hell away from me because I remind him of my brother."
"And you don't like that?" Tessa had always had a thing for Dawson since he first moved to our school freshman year, but the dumbass couldn't keep his paws out of other girl's panties long enough to realize it.
She scrunched her face up. "I don't know. I feel like so much changed, ya know? I have no idea what I want anymore or who I am," she paused. "But I know for a fact I would much rather have you around than him," she assured me, opening up the icing bottles.
"Ha! Unless he is giving you orgasms, then you probably like him better," I joked, getting an eye roll in return.
"No orgasms for me, thank you very much," sticking her roof on her walls. "Dawson told me what happened at the hospital between you two," she said, looking over at me and licking her fingers.
I sighed. "I don't blame the kid for hating me."
"Dawson doesn't hate you."
I gave her a skeptical look and put some polka dots on my house.
"Daisy, what you said hurt and pissed him off but he doesn't hate you. All four of us were inseparable for years and when we tried to help you lashed out at him," she explained.
I exhaled. "I was a sucky person to him."
She leaned across the table and took my hand. "He knows you didn’t mean it, trust me. Now, I want to hear all about this guy who brought you to the hospital."
I blinked. "What?"
"Dawson said this guy got all fired up when he was being an asshole to you. He said the guy jumped out of his seat all ready to beat his ass. God, I am so mad that I freaking missed it."
"I see Dawson still has a huge mouth. Keegan is my neighbor."
"Your neighbor? Omgosh, how romantic. It's like Friends!"
I leaned back in my chair. "Did you not hear anything I just said? He's my neighbor and a friend. He found me upset in the hallway and offered to give me a ride." I shrugged my shoulders. "No big deal."
"Riiiight, this guy made an eight hour drive just for a friend. Are you sure he didn't ask you if you wanted some dick with your ride?"
I snagged a piece of candy from my house and tossed it at her. "Not funny."