Chapter 15 - Remi
It has been two days and I have yet to be taken away from Crestwood. So far, I’ve been locked in a room with no windows and only a bed, and a tiny closet-of-a-nook with a toilet and sink…basically a prison cell. I can’t help but wonder why they haven’t sent me on my way yet. Even Gabe hasn’t come around, though I’m sure it’s because he’s afraid to face me after Paxton’s declaration of my murderous actions.
I spend my hours listening throughout the city. I really have been able to hone my sense of hearing. I map out the town in my mind and it feels like I can almost walk through the streets, listening to whatever I wish. I eavesdrop here and there, but I have yet to find any information about why I haven’t been taken away. I did hear about a new group coming in, though I’m not sure how many of them there are. It makes me think of my first time coming in. I wish I could have heard their entrance questioning, but by the time I found out they were here, they had already been inside a full day. I can picture Paxton now.
What’s your name? Why are you here? Why are you alone? Why are you in a group? How did you hear about Crestwood? Do you have any special abilities? Seriously what kind of question is the last one? Even to this day I can’t guess how he might have pegged me or if it’s just something he asks everyone.
Then there is this whole Elkhorn thing. What if he set me up just so I would go on some wild goose chase to find his daughter because he already knew I was from The Epicenter? Perhaps I had known her during my time there? Truth was, I did know her…or at least knew someone named Jessi Paxton. The girl I knew had been pregnant at the time. I asked Paxton if Jessi was pregnant when he last saw her and he said no, and he sure hoped she wasn’t. I was confused by this but quickly remembered that the reason he hadn’t seen her a year prior to the outbreak was because of the fight over her boyfriend.
Paxton explained that her boyfriend was no good for her and that he would leave her the moment things got serious. She was convinced they were in love - they were high school sweethearts after all. They had been so much at odds that Jessi told him that she hated him, and he told her that he didn’t want anything to do with her. He even told her that if she ever got pregnant, not to ever bring the child to him. She said she wouldn’t think of it.
As I sat there listening to Paxton explain the situation with tears in his eyes, he seemed like a much different person than the one that had just banished me. I don’t know what it was. He seemed…human. I didn’t like the fact that I was interested in his story. I don’t like the fact that his story makes me want to go search for her even more. There is a part of me that finds the idea intriguing that he would condemn a woman (me) to death, only to use said woman to go out and bring his baby girl back to him. Only, his baby girl and his baby girl’s baby were probably greyskin food by now.
Of course he didn’t have a photo of her. I would have been able to confirm if she were the same Jessi that I had met in college. The pregnant girl. But the more I think about it, the more I realize that Paxton has given me an impossible task. I already know that it will be a dead end probably leading to my untimely deadly end.
This situation sucks, there’s no doubt about it, but for once I’m trying to look on the bright side of things. Since the outbreak, I’ve never had a goal outside of my own survival. It is kind of exciting to have a mission even though it means traveling outside the safety of walls again. If they are going to banish me, better to give me a purpose than to say, good luck, hope you don’t die!
I close my eyes and scan Crestwood again with my advanced hearing ability. I check my apartment and hear nothing. I listen in on conversations of families or groups that might be eating together. I get bored with that quickly. I listen at the front wall for about the twentieth time today, but this time it sounds different. There seems to be a big commotion. I hear a lot of shouting, a lot of reasoning. Eventually, I hear Paxton at the wall asking questions.
“What do you want?” he asks over the wall.
A gruff voice answers him. “You have something of mine,” he says. “People that are staying here.”
“You’re nothing but bandits,” Paxton says. “You have exactly ten seconds to get out of here before I order my men to open fire.”
I hear the sound of twenty or more guns clicking into readiness, probably all pointed at the raider (or raiders) below them. Then, the raider says something that sends a jolt to my heart. “I don’t think Shadowface would find that appealing, do you? Why don’t you let me in and we can discuss what you have of mine.”
There is a long silence. I can picture Paxton just standing on the wall thinking to himself. I know he doesn’t want all his men to start asking questions about Shadowface and I know this raider’s words are enough to gain him entrance for as long as he wants. It would seem that the next little while will give me some entertainment as I listen to their conversation.
I follow Paxton until he reaches the second floor of the headquarters building. A few of the guards accompany him, and only one of the raiders is allowed an audience. Once they are settled at Paxton’s desk, he tells his guards to leave.
“Mighty fine of you to speak to me in private,” the bandit says.
“The only reason you aren’t dead right now is because you mentioned Shadowface,” Paxton fumes. “Which, I might add, is not a name I like thrown around Crestwood. Most of my men had never heard of such a person, and now it’s present in their minds.”
“Many apologies,” the raider says. “I didn’t know you were keeping our mutual leader… in the shadows.” He laughs at his own stupid joke. Paxton does not return the laugh.
“What do you want?” Paxton asks.
“Straight to the point. I like that. You have three people I want. They just got here a few days ago. I don’t know their names…I don’t care to know their names. Two boys and a young girl.”
“How young are we talking?”
“Oh come on now, Mayor,” the raider says, “we don’t have time for games. You and I both know this establishment is too small for the entrance of new people to go unnoticed. I’ll even bet you interview them all yourself, don’t you?”
He does.
“First of all,” Paxton says, “don’t call me Mayor. I don’t run this town alone. We have a group of elders.”
“Sure thing,” the raider says. “Whatever you want.”
“Second of all, how do you know if your prey has made their way here?”
“Found their SUV a little ways from here,” the raider says. “Abandoned.”
“What do you want with them?”
“That’s between me and Shadowface,” the raider says.
There is a long pause. I can tell Paxton is thinking about what he wants to say next, trying to be careful with his words. “Why were you tracking them in the first place?”
“They shot a few of my men. Killed them. Then they stole my SUV. Lucky for me, I left a tracker under the hood for such an occasion.”
“Did you provoke them?” Paxton asks.
“What’s it to you? They have something that’s mine.”
“You said they abandoned the SUV,” Paxton says. “Take it. It’s yours.”
“There was something very important in that SUV and it’s gone now,” the raider says. “That particular item is very important to our mutual benefactor.”
“Shadowface pays you?”
“Of course. Why else would I drop the name?”
“Why would Shadowface be working with marauders…thieves?”
“Oh, we’re much more than that. Think of me as more of a henchman. A person that likes to get his hands dirty. Sure I used to be a common raider - one of the best. But I graduated when I met Shadowface.”
“In person?”
“In the flesh.” I can almost hear the boastful smile come across the raider’s face, which, I’m sure makes Paxton look down at his desk in frustration as he plays this game of twenty-million questions.
“How do I know you’re telling the truth?” Paxton says. “Before I do anything, I will have to get the okay from Shadowface.”
I can hear the raider shuffle and finally set something down on the desk in front of Paxton. “You recognize that number?”
Paxton says nothing, but I assume he nods.
“The phone is all yours, Mayor. Call Shadowface if you want. I don’t personally think it would be worth getting anyone angry, though. Such petty things like this are not meant for Shadowface’s approval. I’ve been instructed to get this item from those three punks you let in here by any way possible. If you don’t believe me, call. Go ahead, call…call!”
“That won’t be necessary.” Paxton lets out a deep sigh. “How much time do I have? I’m not going to do this publicly. I want them to get out of Crestwood first.”
“That’s fine,” the raider says. “There’s an old railway factory about ten miles north of here, you know it?”
“Yes. Secure Transportation.”
“That’s it.”
“You want us to drop them off there?”
“That’ll be fine,” the raider says.
“That’s a hot area,” Paxton says. “Lots of greyskins.”
“It will be all right.”
There is a long pause.
“You aren’t going to kill them are you?” Paxton asks.
“You don’t worry your little mayor head about that,” the raider says. “We’ll get what we need and be done with them. I’m sure they didn’t even know what they took.” The raider’s chair scrapes against the floor as he stands, his footsteps are heavy as they make their way to the door.
“Two days,” Paxton says. “Give me two days.”
“Two days,” the raider says. “In the evening.”
Paxton says nothing and the raider walks out of the room, shutting the door behind him.
The light shines on my tired eyes and I’m forced to blink them shut to shield them from the pain.
“Get up,” a familiar voice says to me. It’s Gabe.
“What do you want?” I say in the groggiest voice I can manage.
“It’s time for you to leave,” he says.
“I thought I was supposed to leave two days ago,” I reply, rolling over onto my side with my back to him. “You know, for a moment there I thought I would like imprisonment better than banishment, but I never knew I could get so bored.”
“I think that was the point in waiting,” Gabe says. “Come on. I’m supposed to take you out before the sunrise.”
It takes me a minute, but I finally turn and sit up. He leaves the room long enough for me to put on my shoes and splash water on my face. The cold wind hits me when we get outside. It’s dark and no one but a few guards seems to be awake. “What time is it?” I ask him. He lets me know it’s a quarter until six. I follow him near the gate and I half-expect the guards to open it and tell me good luck, but I’m surprised to see Gabe opening the passenger door of a truck for me. I get in and he walks around to the other side and sits in the driver’s seat. “Are you taking me somewhere?” I ask.
“I’m taking you out of here,” he answers.
Great. “Did you sign up for this job?”
He lets out a sigh and stares down at the steering wheel for a long moment. “I didn’t mean for things to turn out the way they did. I had no idea Paxton was going to claim you murdered Skip.”
“It didn’t come to your mind to say something when he mentioned it?”
“I didn’t know he was going to say that until just before the assembly,” Gabe says, looking up at me. He seems tired as if he hadn’t slept in days. Dark circles have formed under his eyes. He looks pale like he might be coming down with something.
Good, I think.
“So, you didn’t think it was a good idea to say something to the contrary?” I ask.
“What would you have done?”
“I would have been brave about it,” I tell him. “I would have manned up and let other people know that what Paxton said wasn’t how it happened.” I feel more anger toward Gabe than anyone right now…even more so than toward Paxton. I had thought the two of us were becoming friends but that must have gone out the window when he decided not to stand up for me.
“You don’t understand,” Gabe says.
“Enlighten me,” I say.
He puts the truck in gear and we start rolling forward. Soon, we’re driving past dead cars again, trees all around us, Crestwood a distant memory behind us. I can’t help but feel scared. I can feel myself getting into survival mode. It’s not a situation that I’m fond of.
I don’t like to admit when I’m scared. I never have. When I was little, sometimes there would be a big storm coming through and everyone in the school would have to go out into the hallways or under the concrete stairwells away from the windows. I could remember so many of my friends crying like it was the end of the world. Ironic that the end of the world was only a few years away. Now most of them are probably dead and it would have been better if a storm would have just washed them away forever. It makes me sick to think of how many of my classmates might still be out there, their skin rotting to an ash-grey color, with black, soulless eyes, and the lust for flesh.
I want to throw up.
Gabe doesn’t say much as we drive. I want to know what he’s thinking but I’m too proud to ask. I’m not going to show my weakness; I’m going out strong. I’m as good as dead the moment he drops me off, but he will not see fear in my eyes - the reflection of what I feel inside.
I have no weapon. I barely have enough clothes to keep me warm. I have no shelter. I have no food. I’m starting from scratch. The worst of all those? - no weapon. I’m going to have to make do with a sharp stick or a rock, but if I come across three or more, I’ll be walking alongside the greyskins as one of their new members. That is, unless they consume me completely.
The sun rises over the horizon and blinds me until I pull down the visor in front of me. I close my eyes as we travel down the road and I try to listen to someone, anyone, at Crestwood, but the place is already too far gone.
Too far gone. That’s what I am.
We’ve been in the truck for at least an hour before Gabe pulls it over and sets it in park. We sit in silence for almost a full minute. As I look out the windows I see so many different colors. The reds, yellows, and browns mix with some of the more stubborn leaves that still hold onto their green from the summer. I don’t know which is more stubborn, the green leaf that refuses to change color or the brown leaf that refuses to let go of the branch. Eventually, they will all fall to the ground.
“I was going to tell Paxton everything, Remi,” Gabe says. “Even after you told me not to, I marched to his office to let him know that it was my idea.”
“What stopped you?” I ask, my forehead pressed against the cold glass.
“Well, I went to his office, but I overheard him talking to someone. I think it was Shadowface.”
“Why do you think that?”
“Just the way he was talking,” Gabe said. “Paxton just seemed so polite, speaking as though he were stepping around land mines. He was talking about you and how everything went.” He takes a deep breath and rakes his finger through his shaggy hair. “I think this Shadowface person has a hand in a lot more than just goods. I can’t know for sure, but I have a feeling that it was his idea to get rid of you. I didn’t say anything because if I did, I know I won’t get a chance to figure out who this Shadowface character is. If Paxton is dealing with someone that is dangerous, I think it should be exposed. I just need more time to figure everything out. I just hate that it’s at your expense.”
I believe him, though I don’t really want to. I almost feel like it would be easier just to write Gabe off as a coward and try to forget about him, but I can’t. He's not that person. He truly is the kind of person that loves Crestwood and its people. He truly does believe in what they are doing and he wants to keep it safe. I wish I could tell him about the conversation I overheard with Paxton and the raider, but I can’t. I don’t want to tell anybody, but I know that it will help Gabe if I do.
“I’m sorry it has turned out this way,” he says.
“Paxton said I could come back if I find out any information about his daughter,” I say to Gabe.
He looks at me and nods. “He usually tells people that leave Crestwood about her, hoping for something. No one ever comes back with information.”
“So, I’m just a shot in the dark?” I ask.
Gabe doesn’t answer.
“Well, I’m one that might actually know her,” I say. “At least, I think I have met her before. I don’t know if it’s the same girl.”
“Good luck finding her now,” he says. “Three years is an eternity in this world.” He looks at me, his eyes looking sad. “I hope you find her. I hope you find her and can come back to Crestwood.”
“Do you think they would actually let me back in?” I ask.
Gabe nods. “I do. Paxton would find a way to make things better.”
“Well, I doubt I will be able to even get to Elkhorn without a weapon.”
Gabe finally smiles and motions for me to get out of the truck. I follow him to the back and he reaches for a bag in the bed that I hadn’t previously noticed. “I’m not about to send you on your way without some protection.”
He starts handing me all sorts of items. He gives me a thick coat, a backpack full of food, a first aid kit, and a water bottle. He then pulls out my rifle, a pistol, and several extra magazines of ammunition, along with a sheathed machete. Apart from living within Crestwood, I’ve never felt so safe.
“I tried to make sure that you have enough supplies to at least make it a few days,” he says.
“Thank you,” I tell him. “It’s more than I could have hoped for.”
He zips the empty bag back up and rests his arms on the side of the truck. I stand next to him feeling like a walking surplus store, but that’s a good thing.
“Gabe, I feel like I ought to tell you something,” I say. Even as the words come out, my stomach churns. I’m about to tell the man that is carrying out my banishment the truth about my abilities - a betrayal of myself, but I feel like he needs to know.
He looks at me without saying a word, his eyebrows raised.
“I overheard something, a meeting. There was a group of raiders that came to Crestwood yesterday, right?”
“Yeah, Paxton gave them the boot.”
“Not before he met with them. They want something. They are looking for something.”
“How do you know about this?”
“I said I overheard it.”
“You couldn’t have,” he says, cocking his head to the side. “You were in the cell.”
“I know,” I say. I look away from him, biting my lower lip. “Do you remember when I first came here, Paxton asked me if I had any special abilities?”
“He asks everyone that for some reason,” Gabe says.
“Yeah, well, I lied to him when I told him no. I can actually hear things better than anyone.”
“What do you mean?” He turns his whole body toward me and stares deep into my eyes.
“I mean that if I know a place very well, I can listen to just about anything. If I’m up in my apartment, I can listen at the front gate and hear the conversations of the guards. If I want, I can listen to any of the elders’ meetings. I can hear conversations that Paxton has at Headquarters.”
As he looks at me, I can’t tell if he believes what I’m saying.
“Well, yesterday I overheard his conversation with the raider. He’s after the group of people that came into Crestwood.”
“What do you mean after them?”
“I mean, they have something he wants…but it’s not really just something he wants. It’s something Shadowface wants.”
Gabe’s eyes widen at my words as though he just had a new idea and I nod at him.
“Yep. Paxton and the raider guy both answer to this Shadowface. Anyway, expect Paxton to have you exile your newcomers soon. He’s going to want you to take them to a place called Secure Transportation, you know of it?”
Gabe nods, staring now into the bed of the truck.
“Now, I don’t know about these people that came into Crestwood, but I know that I would already trust them better than I would that bandit scum. He’s probably going to kill them out there.”
Gabe looks at me, a serious look on his face. “How long have you been able to…”
“A long while now,” I say. “It just sort of happened one day. It’s weird, but it comes in handy.” I reach out and grab Gabe’s hand. “If I can find out something about Paxton’s daughter, then I will be back in Crestwood and we can figure all this out together. Otherwise…” I lean in and kiss him on the cheek - one that says our friendship has been great, but I probably won’t ever see you again. When I pull away, I can’t tell if Gabe has a bit of water in his eyes, but I don’t linger on the stare.
“Be careful,” I say, taking a step away from him. “This seems like the kind of thing where you could get way in over your head. It doesn’t seem safe.”
“I’ll be okay,” he says. “Paxton trusts me. It’s you that needs to be careful.”
I grin at him and look all around me with a shrug. “This is the life I’m used to. The past three months have been nice, but probably too good to be true.”
“There are other places, I’m sure,” he says.
“You just take care of Crestwood,” I say.
I turn my back to him and begin walking down the winding road. When I’m about a hundred paces away, I listen for Gabe.
Can you hear me speak to you now? he asks.
I keep walking, my head down as the wind hits me.
We will meet again, Remi, he says. Paxton may have placed a wedge between us now, but not forever. I have loved getting to know you. I love being around you. I love you.
I try not to let my head turn, but I give myself away only slightly. Then I keep walking - just as I always do. There’s no place for love, no time to get involved, to become close. More than likely, I’ll be dead soon. Love is just too painful. I should know this better than anyone. I’m not going to let it happen again.
My feet carry me forward as I get lost in my thoughts. I’m long out of sight before I hear the turning over of the engine and Gabe driving in the opposite direction.
I am alone.