THE END
Epilogue
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Wrenn
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Five years have passed since I graduated from Tennerson’s. Dalton and I are still together, still very much in love. He shows no sign of the disease, and some days I see how healthy and strong he is and think they have to have made a mistake. He can’t possibly be sick.
I’m in my final year of law school, and Dalton teaches at a local elementary school in Boston. He says his third grade students are much easier to handle than teenage girls, and I agree with him.
I’m getting toward that age where I think about having children of my own—then I wonder is it selfish of me to want that. I dread the day this disease takes hold of Dalton. Is it fair to put our children through that? I can’t even imagine how hard it must have been for him, watching his father deteriorate; and as a mother, you’d want to protect them from that, right?
Even if it means not bringing them into this world?
Then I think about what an amazing man he is, and how lucky our children would be to have even just a few years with him.
I never thought that at twenty-three, these would be decisions I’d have to make sooner rather than later. Not once have I regretted my decision to be with Dalton. Everyday I feel his love for me and think how lucky I am to have found that.
I will make the most of the time I have with him, and together we will deal with whatever life throws at us.
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Dalton
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Every moment I spend with Wrenn is a gift, and one I am grateful for. So many people never experience love, and I’m lucky to have found someone I want to spend the rest of my life with.
I’m symptom-free and happy, and I try my damn best to appreciate that. I won’t sit here and say it hasn’t been hard. I wonder what is around the corner, and how we will deal with that.
You try to focus on the good, and for the most part you can do that. Then every now and then the negativity creeps in and you can’t help but think about what you’re going to be leaving behind.
I look at Wrenn and I see this incredible woman with such inner strength that every day, she amazes me. I want to give her the children she craves so badly, but I worry. Seeing my dad go through the final stages of this was hell—something I’d never want to inflict on another human being, let alone my own children. But is it fair of me to deny Wrenn the gift of being a mother? Because she would make a fucking amazing one. I don’t know what the answer is.
For now, I’ll continue to live my life and be thankful for what I have. There are so many worse off than me. I could have an aggressive cancer, or lose my life in an accident. We know what is coming, and no, it’s not an easy thing to live with, but we still have today, and the next day, and the day after that.
Before I met Wrenn and when Dad was still alive, I remember sitting with him, watching him struggle to breathe and thinking to myself if it ever came to this I would end my life. I wouldn’t let my family suffer the pain of watching me die. Now? I don’t think I could do it. I couldn’t rob her of those few precious extra moments together.
This disease sucks, but I refuse to let it define me. I’m determined to fill our lives with such happy memories that after I’m gone, Wrenn remembers only the wonderful moments we shared. Every day I make sure she knows how much she means to me. If there is one thing I’ve learned, it’s that you can never tell someone enough how much they mean to you, because you never know when the day is going to be your last.
“Live each day like there is no tomorrow, but don't forget to live each day like there was no yesterday either. Live in the present, for it is a gift from God. That's why it is called the present.”—Emily Austen.
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Synopsis and excerpt for Very Bad Things, by Ilsa Madden-Mills
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Very Bad Things, the #1 New Adult Romance from bestselling author Ilsa Madden-Mills.
"Very Bad Things is maddening, passionate, heart-breaking, all-encompassing, and about a million other adjectives." Books to Breathe
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Synopsis:
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Born into a life of privilege and secrets, Nora Blakely has everything any nineteen-year-old girl could desire. She’s an accomplished pianist, a Texas beauty queen, and on her way to Princeton after high school. She’s perfect...
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