A Perfect Life: A Novel

Blaise got a hint of the prevailing winds that afternoon. She had lunch at her desk, and glanced up to see an e-mail coming in on her computer. And she sat staring at it after she read it. And then read it again. The president of the news division had resigned and been replaced. He had been lured away by another network. And she knew instantly from experience that everything was about to change. The new president was thirty years old, and she knew him by reputation. Everyone in the business knew him. He was a hotshot, and was considered a renegade, previously at another network, and known to keep the bottom line in his sights at all times. He loved reality shows for that reason. And they were so much cheaper to make. He was also famous for firing people on a whim, with no warning. One slip in the ratings, and you were dead. And he would find someone cheaper to replace talent who he felt made too much money. He was good at what he did, and he would be watching Blaise like a hawk. As if she didn’t have enough problems at the moment. She looked panicked when she told Mark about Zack Austin.

“I hear he’s a real son of a bitch,” Mark said in a whisper, as though the walls had ears now. “No one is safe with him running things.” He had come from the entertainment division and Blaise was afraid he’d be looking to jazz things up, possibly with talent closer to his age. Blaise looked nervous. Even in her position, no one was ever totally secure at the network. She made more money than any on-air talent, and if he could replace her with someone cheaper, younger, and whom he considered as good, there was no question that he would. She was a big target, and she had the distinct feeling that Zack Austin would be gunning for her. Blaise was a nervous wreck by the time she got home that night, and Simon could see that she looked strained.

He made another delicious dinner, although simpler than the one the night before, since he knew Blaise was careful about what she ate. He made a simple saffron risotto, roast chicken, green beans, and fruit salad. And they ate it all. And she lingered for a moment when he was cleaning up. Salima had gone to her room for something, and wanted to sing with him again. And he had taken her to Ellis Island that day. He thought she should write a paper on it for school, for her American history class.


Blaise was pouring herself a cup of tea from a chamomile infusion he had made, and he glanced over at her. “Are you okay?” he asked her, worried that he was crossing a line. But she looked anxious and distracted all through dinner. She started to nod, and then decided to be honest.

“No, I’m not. They brought in a new head of the news division who doesn’t know anything about the news. He’s from the entertainment side of the business. We’d all better get out our tap shoes.” Simon looked stunned by her answer.

“Are you kidding? You’re Blaise McCarthy, you’re a legend all over the world. People in the desert on camels know who you are.” She shrugged.

“Maybe. But the network’s not as impressed as you or the camels are. They always figure we’re replaceable, and they’re always looking for someone younger and cheaper. I cost them a fortune. And they don’t give a damn about ‘Blaise McCarthy,’ the ‘legend.’ As long as they sign the checks, they call the shots. As someone once said to me, it’s the Golden Rule. He who has the gold rules. And they do. I’m just hired help as far as they’re concerned. There’s nothing secure in this business, and the longer I’m in it and the older I get, the greater the chance they’ll get rid of me sooner or later. In fact, they’re grooming someone to knock me out of my spot now. She’s just not ready yet, or I’d be collecting unemployment, or doing stories about dog shows for the four A.M. news.”

Simon looked horrified. In his mind, she was a star. In hers, she had to fight all the time. And she knew it was true. It had the ring of truth to him too, and opened his eyes to the stress she lived with every day. He had been convinced that being as famous as she was meant that you never had to worry, that she was safe. Instead, she had to worry even more. He wondered if she had to worry about money too, and hoped not for her sake. But it was obvious she depended only on herself. There was no one else around. And somehow, listening to her, he realized that being a star was not enough. It was a lonely, scary life. And he wouldn’t have traded places with her for anything in the world. For all the glory and so-called glamour, she still had a kid who needed special attention that nothing would fix and was trying to give her a good life. There was no one there to help her, and she had no partner and was alone, and she lived with constant stress at work. He was glad he didn’t have her job, and he had greater respect for her now after what she’d just said. At least he could be there for Salima. He gave Blaise a sympathetic look, and she smiled at him with a weary expression, as Salima walked in and told him to hurry up. She wanted him to play piano for her again. She’d had fun the night before. And she didn’t realize that he’d been having a serious conversation with her mother. He left the kitchen with Salima a minute later.