Disco regarded Marius over his shoulder. “I think we both know it’s too late for that.”
“That’s true, but I’m telling you just the same.” Marius moved closer, until his mouth was near Disco’s ear. “Don’t make things worse. It won’t help either of you. You have to be smart. Become the vampire you were intended to be. Your humanity will serve no purpose.” He lowered his voice, like he was sharing a shameful secret. “Trying to protect her could backfire, and then where will you be? Suffering alongside her? Unable to do anything but watch as she’s broken? If she survives the night, you have an eternity to mend her wounds. You can be there for her in the aftermath. Sometimes it’s not actions that count but the absence of them. Remember that.”
Disco weighed the words, countered with a curt nod, and wrapped an arm around me. He didn’t lift me to his chest, and I wanted to kiss him for knowing after everything that had happened I would want to walk to our room instead of being carried.
The family parted and made way. Goose tried to say something as we approached, but I remained silent when our eyes met. He had never been good at hiding his feelings, so it was easy to read his guilt. Paine took the lead as we slowly made our way upstairs. I was a teensy bit wobbly from the blood loss and lack of sleep, but I knew my body would stabilize soon. I just needed a hot shower and a serious power nap to recharge and pull myself together.
As well as one more, very important thing.
When we made it to the room, I paused in front of Paine. “We’re going to need time alone.” When he didn’t get my message, starting to walk past me, I put a hand on his chest and glanced at Disco. “Not the three of us.”
“You’re hurt.” I could tell he wanted to stay. He didn’t budge from his spot in the room’s entrance.
“I’m already on the mend.” I touched the spot on my head and showed him the drying blood. “See?”
“We need to formulate a plan,” Paine stalled. “Over half the day is gone. We don’t have a lot of time to strategize.”
“Soon,” I said. “I want to talk to Dis—” I quickly corrected myself, “I need to speak to Gabriel.” From this moment forward, until we were all safe, the nickname couldn’t be uttered. “We need time alone.”
“Oh.”
I could see the envy in Paine’s gaze. He had always been intuitive, able to read so easily between the lines. Even if Disco didn’t know what I intended, Paine did. It wasn’t the first time I was glad he didn’t have memories of our time together, and it wouldn’t be the last. He might want more than friendship but his loyalty to Disco was absolute. The Paine of the future had initiated more from me due to the fact Disco was dead. If he had lived, I was certain Paine would have kept his distance—no matter how difficult it was for him.
“I’ll be in my room,” he said quietly. “Come for me when you’re ready.”
The door closed, and I moved away from the man at my side. It felt too good to be so close to Disco, and I had to do something before I could tell him what I needed to say.
“He’s right, we have to talk,” Disco murmured. “I have—”
I stopped him by holding up my hand, resisting the temptation to place my fingers over his full lips. “I’m going to get a shower. Then we’ll discuss everything.”
He didn’t like it, I knew. Space was something he didn’t want to give me when I was in trouble. In the past, when he felt me withdraw emotionally, he forced me back to reality. Before things had gone to shit, I loved that about him. He refused to let me hide from him or myself.
I felt his eyes following me as I walked to the bathroom.
“Don’t take long,” he warned, his throaty baritone dipping an octave. “It’s important we have a plan.”