~Declan~
"The doctor dude from Thanksgiving isn't going to be here, is he?" I asked, as we pulled into Clare's parents' driveway.
There weren't nearly as many cars here as on Thanksgiving, so I took that as a good sign.
"No" —Leah laughed —"just immediate family today, Hotshot. You really didn't like him, did you?"
"He was flirting with you —right in front of me!" I said defensively.
That only made her laugh harder. I gave her a scowl, and she pulled my hand in hers.
"You had nothing to worry about then, and you have nothing to worry about now. A million men could flirt with me, but I'm not going anywhere."
"Damn straight," I answered with a grin, leaning across the seats to kiss her.
Just as I deepened the kiss, I heard a tiny giggle and my eyes sprang open just in time to see a little girl's head appear in the car window. We pulled apart quickly as Leah turned and opened the door.
"Hey, Short Stack! What are you doing out here? It's freezing!"
Maddie's little nose was bright red, and she was bundled up in a puffy pink jacket with matching gloves and a hat. "I was waiting for you at the inside at the window, but you didn't get out of the car. So, Mommy said it was okay if I came out and got you."
"Well, we're ready to go inside. Think you could show us the way?" Leah asked.
Maddie nodded her head with enthusiasm. We got out of the car and all headed toward the house. I bent down and scooped Maddie up in my arms as she giggled. I was pretty sure it was the first time I'd ever picked up a kid in my life. They didn't break easily, did they? She seemed happy, so I went with it.
"Hey, you. I think you asked me a question about your Aunt Leah the last time we met. You remember?" I asked Maddie.
"Um..." She thought about it while scrunching her nose and lips together as if it helped her concentrate. "Oh, yes! I remember!" she said, getting excited as she looked at her aunt.
"You want to ask me that question again?" I chuckled.
She looked at her aunt, and Leah just shrugged in response, which caused Maddie to giggle.
"Okay, but first, I'm just going to say that you're silly."
"Duly noted," I said, straight-faced.
"Declan, are you my Aunt Leah's boyfriend?"
"Why yes, Maddie, I am Leah's boyfriend. Aren't I lucky?"
She just giggled again as we made our way into the house. I set her down gently, and she ran off into the house, announcing that Leah and her silly boyfriend were here.
"You're insane," Leah said, shaking her head.
"About you," I answered before kissing her cheek.
"God, that was awful. You need better pick-up lines."
I laughed. "Why? Who am I trying to pick up? I already got what I wanted."
"That was so much better. That one kinda makes me want to hump you right here."
"That can be arranged. I'm sure we could find a closet," I teased, remembering our almost indiscretion in the closet at Clare and Logan's house.
She grinned at me as we rounded the corner of the hallway into the family room where we found Clare and Logan huddled together in a tight hug. They looked up, and my heart fell. Clare had been crying, and Logan was visibly upset.
"Oh God, what's wrong? Please say it's not what I think it is," Leah said in a panic, gripping my hand tighter.
"No, no, I'm fine. Cancer treatment is exactly on schedule, and things look good, great even," Logan said.
Leah's death grip on my hand loosened a little, and I felt some of the blood rush back to my fingers.
"Oh thank God. So, what is it? Why are we upset? Whose ass does Declan need to kick?"
"Whoa, why I am being thrown into this?" I asked, throwing up my hands in defense.
"Logan's father called this morning." Clare said.
"Oh," we both answered in union .
That would explain it. Logan's father was like mine, only the upgraded model. He was richer, meaner, and crueler. His idea of love was sending checks on birthdays and graduation. He hadn't spoken to Logan since the day his previous marriage went public in a very embarrassing way and he'd made no attempts to meet Logan's new family since he'd married Clare. He'd never spent one second of his life caring about his family, and Logan had spent his feeling like a shunned outcast.
There was only one reason Mitchell Matthews would be calling.
"So, how much is cancer going for these days?" I asked.
"A quarter of a mil apparently," Logan answered absently.
"So, the man called you up, after years of nothing, only to offer you money because he'd heard that you have cancer?" Leah asked.
"Yep, pretty much."
"So, did you take the money?" I asked, grinning.
"Declan!" Leah scolded.
I brushed it off. Logan and I were friends for a reason. We thought the same way, and I bet he was thinking the same thing I was.
Logan grinned back and nodded. "Yep, sure did. It's being wired on Monday. I will then take his guilt money and donate it anonymously to as many cancer societies as I can find. My family and I will spend the rest of the holidays in New York with my mother, knowing his money is going to hundreds of other families in need. It's a win for everyone."
I probably would have thrown in something with a little more vengeance, like sending out a party invite with my father's address to the entire population of Facebook and then watching from afar as they all descended on his house. But that was where Logan and I differed.
"It's still pretty messed-up that your father calls only to send you money. Did he even ask about your wife and child?" Leah asked.
"Nope."
"Well, I'm pretty sure the motto we used for these situations back in high school still works," I said.
He chuckled, nodding his head in agreement.
"What motto is that?" Leah asked.
"F*ck 'em. F*ck 'em all."
~Leah~
I'd spent Christmas with Clare's family for as long as I could remember. Years ago, ever since Clare's mother had asked about my plans for the day and I'd sheepishly mentioned my father having to work, I'd been here. I thought she had known it was a lie, but she never asked. She'd just opened her home and family to me, like she always had...like she did this night with Declan.
Christmas Day for the Finnegan family was for family only. Where Thanksgiving was a come-one-come-all event, Christmas was small and intimate. Having Declan with me felt special. It made it more absolute to me that he was actually here, holding my hand, whispering, "I love you," in my ear. Sharing him with my family made our love real to me.
Clare said nothing about our obvious new commitment to each other, but I did see her wipe away a tear or two when she overheard one of Declan's endearments whispered over the course of the night. By the way she was reacting, she must have really thought I was going to die a spinster.
Mrs. Laura Finnegan, or Mama as we all called her, was completely enamored with my new boyfriend. Not only was he a Hollywood star in one of her favorite movies, but he was also charming, sweet, and hot as hell —her words, not mine. When she'd uttered those shocking syllables, I'd about choked on my stolen cookie in the kitchen. Mama Finnegan did not usually use such language.
As we waited for dinner to cook, we all debated on what to do. When we were kids, we would all beg to open presents, which Maddie had already tried and failed at, but we were adults now, and we had restraint. Plus, we'd already asked. We were shot down, just like the kid. Some things never changed. So, we'd moved on to card games.
"Uno!" Logan yelled triumphantly.
We all groaned.
"Okay, that's it. I'm not playing with him anymore. Remind me not to play against a Harvard-educated doctor anymore. It's just not fair," Garrett lamented, who'd arrived shortly after us.
"Ah, come on, I didn't win every game, did I?" Logan asked.
We all nodded at him.
"Sore losers," he grumbled.
We all laughed. I relaxed into my seat on the sofa and sipped on my hot apple cider. Clare was snuggled up next to me, sharing a blanket. Both of us had wisely opted out of the card games, having played with Logan before.
"Logan seems very comfortable with your parents now," I commented.
"Well, he did put a ring on it," she joked, holding up her beautiful antique wedding set.
"Hand job?" I asked quietly.
"What?" she feigned innocence. "No! I can't believe you...okay, fine, you got me."
"Nice. Nothing relaxes a man like a little hand action before meeting the parents." I laughed.
"And Declan?"
"Blow job."
"Right on."
We high-fived each other before giggling into our cider, which eventually turned into roaring laughter. The men finished cleaning up their cards and looked to us for entertainment.
"Okay, so what do we do next?" Garrett asked.
There was a strict no-TV rule on Christmas.
"Oh, I know! Let's look at photo albums!" Clare exclaimed.
Both Garrett and I moaned.
"I think that sounds like an excellent idea," Logan said, looking over at my soon-to-be-dead boyfriend.
Declan was laughing and nodding his head.
Traitor.
Almost immediately after saying it, Clare returned to the family room with a ton of photo albums, nearly skipping in her purple sweater dress and heels.
"Come on, everyone gather together! Let's see how cute I was!" she beamed.
Logan joined her on the floor in the middle of the living room. He pulled her onto his lap, and she began to sort through the albums. I rose from my seat on the sofa and begrudgingly planted my ass next to them on the floor, next to my traitorous boyfriend who was still on the floor from getting his ass kicked in Uno. He was currently leaning over to sneak a peek at whatever Clare was looking at.
Garrett, seeing he had no choice in the matter, also made his way down to the floor, lying down next to his sister, as she started on the first album. Clare's father sat behind us in his ancient recliner, chuckling as Clare flipped through the pages. I could hear her mother humming away in the kitchen as she prepared dinner. As much as I'd groaned, it was nice to sit here, flipping through happy young memories. All of the good parts of my childhood were in these pages, under this roof, and with this family.
"Here's one of Leah from...oh, junior prom!"
Before I had time to grab it, Declan snatched it up in his hands.
"You were just as hot back then," he said with a smirk before frowning. "Who's the dude?"
"Oh, uh...Scott Evans. We dated for a few months that year. He was the quarterback, and I was a cheerleader. Looked good on paper, but it was a disaster in real life."
"Looks like a moron," Declan said.
"Are you jealous of a boy I dated over ten years ago?" I was seriously amused.
"No," he grunted. "Yes."
I laughed and squeezed his arm. "If it makes you feel better, he flunked out of college and works part-time at a shoe store in the mall. Oh, and he still lives with his mom."
"Marginally better, thanks." He grinned.
We looked through more high school pictures and then got to college. Clare's hand stopped when she found a picture of her and Ethan from their first Thanksgiving. Their beaming young faces were mushed together in an exuberant hug. He looked happy, healthy, and full of life —exactly like I always wanted to remember him. Ethan, like me, hadn't had a place to call home, and he'd spent all his holidays with us after he started dating Clare. The Finnegans had opened their home to many people over the years —taking me, Ethan, Logan, and now Declan, it appeared, into their family. They were the very best kind of people.
Logan's fingers wrapped around his wife's, and he held her, knowing that even though she was happy in his arms, the man she'd lost would always be close to her heart.
"You okay?" he asked.
We all watched on, ready to help her through the grief if needed. She nodded as a single tear ran down her cheek. Then, she placed the album down and moved on to another one.
"I'm fine, really." She smiled softly. "Thank you," she said quietly to Logan.
He nodded and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek.
"Let's find some pictures of Garrett, why don't we?" Clare said.
We all agreed and began looking through the piles of albums. I hit pay dirt first when I cracked open an album to be greeted by the familiar face of a younger, more innocent-looking Garrett.
"Hey, there's the Goober I remember!" I looked up to the present-day Garrett and then back down to the high school version preserved on the pages of the album.
We all gathered around as I flipped through photos of Garrett in high school. It was then that I realized how much he really had changed. He'd had a light in his eyes then that didn't reach his eyes now.
"Okay, dinner's almost ready!" Laura called from the kitchen.
I skipped a few pages and made my way to the end of the album. I was eager to see if that genuine Garrett smile was still there. I was trying to pinpoint when it had disappeared. Then, I landed on graduation pictures. There was eighteen-year-old Garrett, posing with his high school girlfriend, their eyes brimming with excitement and youth.
Garrett visibly stiffened next to Clare as his emerald eyes locked on the picture.
"Hey, I remember her," Clare said, "Mia, wasn't it?"
Garrett just nodded. Clare was sitting next to him rather than across from him, so she didn't have the view I did. She couldn't see the look of absolute devastation on his face.
"What happened to her?" Clare asked.
"She left me," was all he said before getting up and exiting the room.
Based on the look on his face just now, I'd bet that shadow of a smile he carried showed up the day she walked out of his life.
~Declan~
"So, this is your idea of fun?" I asked as we walked hand in hand into the retirement home.
Leah gave me a shy smile before greeting the lady sitting at the front desk. "Hey, Alice. How's it going?" she said.
"Well, good morning, sugar. Is it Wednesday already?"
Looking down at the calendar with many papers and schedules scattered on her desk, the older woman, who reminded me a little of Betty White, nodded.
"Well, I guess it is. Always glad to have you Miss Leah. And who's this handsome gentleman you have with you today? You didn't have to bring me a present, you know?" she said with a wink.
Leah laughed and introduced me to the rather randy secretary. "Alice, this is my boyfriend, Declan. He was curious why I kept disappearing every Wednesday afternoon, and when I told him this is where I went, he had to see for himself." She took a sideways glance toward me and smiled, clearly remembering our conversation from earlier that week.
"You volunteer at an old folks' home?" I'd asked.
"Yep. And they really hate when you call it that."
"But last week, didn't you say you volunteered at an after-school program?"
"Yeah, I do that occasionally, too." She'd just shrugged.
And that was when I'd told her I had to see it to be sure. How could one person do that much? I could count the number of volunteer hours I'd given in my life on one hand. What was her motivation? I had to see her in action, see this other side of the woman who had captured my heart.
And so, a few days later, we were here, about to spend the afternoon with the elderly. I suddenly regretted that decision when we signed in and took a left down the hall into the dining room where I saw the residents for the first time.
What the hell was I supposed to do? What would we talk about? I didn't have anything in common with an eighty-year-old. As if sensing my anxiety, Leah squeezed my hand, gave me a reassuring smile, and pulled me into the dining room.
"Want to grab a piece of pie? They make amazing pie," she said.
"Sure." Pie sounded safe. I'd do anything to delay the awkwardness.
I should have chosen a different activity for the afternoon. My grandparents had died when I was young, and since then, I hadn't had any contact with anyone older than my parents. Would she be disappointed if I sucked at this?
We grabbed our pie, coconut for her and lemon meringue for me, and then we took our seats next to a couple at a round table near the center of the room. Leah had explained this retirement home had all levels of residents. Some were highly functioning and had come here because they simply hadn't wanted to live on their own anymore. Others required constant supervision. Leah's volunteer duties were simple. She was there to be a friend.
The couple we sat next to recognized Leah in an instant, and they greeted us warmly. They appeared to be part of the higher-functioning group Leah had described. They were both well-dressed and presentable. The woman looked like she'd thrown her entire jewelry box on. She was wearing several gold necklaces around her neck, four or five clunky bracelets, and a ring on every perfectly polished finger.
"Hello, darling!" the woman said. "How are you?"
"Good, Millie. How have you been this last week?"
"Can't complain. Still breathing," she said with a wink. "Now, who's this? You've never brought a friend with you...and such a handsome one, Leah!"
Her husband let out a huff, and Millie placated him by placing a hand on his shoulder and giving him a loving smile. He looked a little worse for the wear than she did. He was thinner, his expensive clothes hanging a bit on his frail body, and his skin appeared to be a few shades paler than it should be. When his eyes locked with hers, he smiled, and it was like the whole world disappeared.
I turned away, feeling like I was intruding on a very intimate moment.
Leah smiled as she turned away briefly, too. When she looked back toward them, she said, "This is my boyfriend, Declan. Declan, these two lovely people are Millie and William Taylor. They've been residents here for almost a year."
"It's lovely to meet you, Declan. You look very familiar," Millie said, looking at me a bit closer.
"I just have one of those faces, I guess," I said with a shrug, giving Leah a knowing smile. I wasn't about to out myself in an old folks' home.
We talked over pie, and I found it easier than I'd thought to speak with them. They were just people, and I could understand why Leah would come here. They were kind and loving. They treated Leah like a friend rather than someone coming in to check on them, and Leah did the same to them. She honestly enjoyed returning every week, visiting with the residents and learning about the different paths their lives had taken them on.
In our conversations, I learned William, or Willie as he liked to be called —it took me a minute to get over the fact that they were Mille and Willie —had been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. I noticed the small shaking in his hand as he brought the fork to his mouth and when he tried to hold his coffee cup.
"When we found out, we had many options. We could have had a live-in nurse, but I didn't like the idea of having someone in our space all the time. The doctors said I could have moved Willie to a facility and stayed in the house by myself." She gave her husband a meaningful look. "But I knew that would never be an option. I couldn't leave him. So, we decided to sell our house and make the move together." She gave her husband a small smile as she held his hand. "No matter what life might throw at us, we're in it together until the end."
"Always," Willie said, his voice shaking. He carefully brought his wife's hand to his lips.
I looked at Leah, and at that moment, I knew I needed to figure out a way to close the gap between our homes because I would not lose her over something like distance. I would not lose her, period.