Chapter 6 – Alone in the Woods
Early in the morning, Henry heard Damianʼs coach finally leave.
At last... he thought drowsily, turning over in his bed. He didnʼt care to watch Damian depart. He had seen enough of him for the time being.
Last night, he had been silent witness to a little haggle between Damian and Sarah in the entrance hall—Henry found himself repeatedly hiding at the landing of the first floor in order to eavesdrop on what was going on downstairs. Damian had been holding Sarahʼs hands in a tight grip, his usual triumphant grin on the face, whereas Sarah had appeared extremely distraught.
“Please excuse me now. It has been a long day, and I am terribly tired,” she had moaned, desperately trying to pull away from Damian. But the latter had just ignored her plea and instead had leaned forward in a sudden and bold attempt to kiss her straight on the lips. But Sarah, obviously having seen it coming, had quickly turned her head away from him so that his mouth had not hit hers but had ended up somewhere in her hair.
“You naughty little brat...” Damian had whispered with an expression on his face which conveyed that he was both appalled and fueled by Sarahʼs habit of constantly rejecting him.
“I will see you again at your birthday celebration in two weeks,” he had said. “I have a big surprise for you...”
A mysterious smile on his lips, he had pinched her cheek with his fingers as if she was a little child, then he had finally let her go, staring after her as she had grumpily crept upstairs without throwing him a backward glance.
Henry noticed that in Damianʼs presence, Sarah felt intimidated and scared, which Henry could understand as Damian came across as incredibly self-confident and strong. Henry was certain, however, that this confidence and strength was at least partially a mask; otherwise, Damian would not have felt the need to worry that a lower class tutor could outstrip him. And worried he obviously was, or else he would not have threatened to kill that tutor.
Henry slowly hauled himself out of bed and got ready for the day. While washing and shaving, he wondered what kind of surprise Damian could possibly have in store for the girl. Judging the way he had announced it, Henry dreaded that it was not merely another piece of jewelry.
Forcing himself not to think about it all the time and not to let his mind be overcome by gloomy visions, he put on his clothes, grabbed his books, and walked over to the classroom. A quick glance at his pocket watch told him that he was a couple of minutes late because he had wasted far too much time dawdling and ruminating over Damianʼs mysterious surprise. But assuming that Sarah would surely be late as well, he didnʼt worry too much about his own delay.
He opened the classroom door and was in for a major surprise: Sarah was already there, sitting at her desk, holding a pencil, her book lying open in front of her. She didnʼt say anything, but looked up when Henry entered and nodded slightly to greet him.
“Good morning, Miss Sarah,” Henry said, trying to not let his puzzlement show too much. “I hope I have not let you wait all too long…”
“Just ten minutes,” Sarah replied.
Henry took another look at his watch. It was twenty-five to nine. If she had waited ten minutes already, this meant that she had indeed been there five minutes before lesson started. Shaking his head in disbelief, Henry walked over to his desk and sat down on the chair. He wondered if her unusual behavior could be interpreted as a sign that her attitude towards him had not changed since their nightly encounter and that she still liked him and didnʼt regret that she had kissed him.
There was only one way to find out.
Henry looked at her and flashed her a contented and endearing smile, the most endearing that he was capable of.
Sarah ever so quickly lowered her gaze and blushed dark red.
Henryʼs smile grew even wider.
It was a sign.
Still, Henry could sense that Sarah did not appear overly happy that morning. Yet again, he had to think about the previous evening when he had seen her with Damian downstairs in the hall, and he guessed that the whole situation in general and the remark about the mysterious surprise had surely unsettled her just as much as it had unsettled him. And then he had to think about everything that Oscar had told him about her past, about her mother and Anthony Farringworth, and he decided that from now on he would be nothing but gentle with her even if her behavior was confusing at times.
“Are you alright, Miss Sarah?” he asked her.
She nodded quietly.
“It must have been a pretty strenuous weekend for you...”
Sarah frowned. Henry gathered that it was probably better if he avoided the topic ʻBournemouthʼ altogether. The memories seemed to burden her too much.
“Alright, we will not work too hard today,” he said softly.
A faint smile of gratitude blossomed on Sarah's lips.
“That would be very kind of you, Sir…” she whispered. Henry felt a pleasant shiver running down his spine. The tone of her voice, this warm, enchanting sweetness that came out of her mouth, reminded him of the moment when she had apologized for the horse incident, when she had kissed him with these soft and tender lips.
Henry secretly pinched himself in the leg in order to get a clear head.
“Well, let us talk about these boring kings then,” he said with a sigh.
His comment made Sarah chuckle.
Her chuckling made him chuckle too; which made her chuckle even more.
Henry tried to pull himself together to avoid that they both broke out with laughter. But then he began to wonder why he should constantly pull himself together.
Why not be a little foolish? Why not be in love? a sweet voice whispered into his ear.
Because she is meant for someone else… another voice, a rather nasty and nagging one, whispered into his other ear.
Just shut your mouth, the two of you… Henry thought angrily.
“I suppose you have not had a chance to do your homework?” he asked, trying hard to strike a more serious note. He had assigned the girl to read a chapter in her history book about past British kings and to learn their names by heart.
“I have indeed. I had a lot of time on the train to Bournemouth,” Sarah answered proudly.
Again, Henry was confused by her sudden zealousness.
“Good… very good. Please begin with the kings of the House of Normandy. Do you remember the time of their rule?” Henry asked.
“They ruled in the 11th century. The first king of the House of Normandy was William the Conqueror,” Sarah began, trying not to look at her book.
“That is correct,” Henry answered.
“Followed by William II, who was his son.”
“Correct.”
“The next king was… “
Sarah broke off and began to chuckle again.
“Well, what was his name?” Henry asked, smiling in amusement and highly welcoming the fact that they were beginning to have a little fun.
“Henry,” Sarah answered. “Henry I. He was called just like you.”
“That is quite true. What a coincidence,” Henry said merrily. “Although I am unfortunately unable to claim I was any monarch, which would undoubtedly have its merits. Anyway, can you tell me who came after him?”
“Well, there was a king called Stephen of Blois,” Sarah continued, “but after him there was yet another Henry. Henry Cur… Curtle… Turtle…”
Sarah frowned as she tried to remember the name.
“Curtmantle,” Henry helped her.
“Right, Curtmantle… And then there was Richard I and John Lackland. And then there was another Henry again, Henry III. Actually, there were quite a lot of kings called Henry during the reign of the House of Lancaster later in time; Henry IV, V and VI.”
“There you go,” Henry replied. “Must have been a popular name then.”
“I suppose so,” Sarah answered.
They looked at each other in silence for a moment. Henry was drowning in her brown eyes as she was bravely trying to hold his gaze. But this time it was not like on the first day when it had felt like a staring contest between them. No, this was rather like the start of a little romance without the use of words. After a while, though, Henry sensed how much it made Sarah uncomfortable. He quickly looked away in order not to embarrass her.
“Well, I can clearly see that you have done your homework,” he said matter-of-factly and flicked open another page in his book.
“It is quite warm in here,” Sarah suddenly threw in.
Henry realized that the air had indeed become terribly stifling inside the classroom. He quickly walked over to the window and opened it, but with summer announcing its arrival, there was only a faint breeze coming from outside. Henry looked at Sarah and saw how tightly she was wrapped in her bodice. Knowing that underneath their bodice women also wore corsets which were even tighter, he kept wondering how one could bear that kind of garment without suffocating in it. Once he had read that in the long run corsets could even cause all sorts of physical deformities or damages to the organs. Still, all the ladies seemed to miraculously make it through the day.
Suddenly, he caught himself wishing he was allowed to unbutton Sarahʼs corset; and not only for the sake of enabling her to breathe.
Sarah raised her head and looked at him, tearing him out of his daydreams and becoming aware of the fact that he had secretly been observing her. This time they both blushed simultaneously.
“Shall I continue with the kings?” Sarah asked uncertainly. She looked pale and feeble, as if she was about to fall off her chair any moment. Opening the window had not really caused the desired cooling. Rather the opposite.
Suddenly, Henry had an idea.
“Miss Sarah, may I suggest something?” he asked, walking back to his desk. “What if we held lessons outside? It is such a bright and clear day, and some fresh air might do us good. It will surely be better than being confined to this small room.”
Henry watched Sarah expectantly as she was thinking hard about his suggestion.
“If you wish so...” she finally answered, shrugging her shoulders and appearing indifferent. But from the way she grabbed her pencils and books in a rush, jumped up from her chair and left the room, Henry gathered that she liked his idea more than she dared to admit. He quickly took his own teaching materials, hastened after her, and quietly closed the door behind him.
Having arrived outside, they crossed the yard and walked along the narrow gravel path which led into the garden. Henry spotted some chairs and a small table in the shadow of a huge oak tree; an ideal place for learning, as he found. However, not far away from it, Thelma and her maids were having their laundry day. The latter meant that they put up huge washtubs, in which they threw an enormous number of towels, sheets, and clothes. And after having scrubbed, thoroughly kneaded, and rinsed them, they would lay the washing out onto the grass to let them dry in the sun. There were tons of sheets and dirty clothes. Henry had never seen such an amount of laundry in his entire life, and he assumed that it would take the women all day to finish it.
Lady Partridge was there as well, shouting orders at Heather and Ada, even though it was Thelmaʼs task to look after the girls and tell them what to do. But Henry knew by now that Lady Partridge liked to mess with everything and generally pretended to always know better; just like her husband. And so Lady Partridge shouted at Thelma, and Thelma shouted at the girls, and the girls shouted at each other. Henry immediately realized that it was definitely not the ideal surrounding to concentrate on learning and have some quiet hours with Sarah.
He wondered what to do. He didnʼt want to stay in the garden, but he did not want to take the girl back to the scruffy classroom either as he was truly worried that she might faint, stuck in her bodice as she was. By no means, he wanted to be the reason for her feeling unwell.
“Well, perhaps you should go back to your room and have a little rest, Miss Sarah. We can continue tomorrow,” he mumbled disappointedly. In fact, he was not only disappointed but rather annoyed. He found that it should have been his turn now to get his own share of quality time with Sarah; after all, Damian had been allowed to spend the whole weekend with her. But he guessed that obviously it wasnʼt meant to be.
Suddenly, Sarahʼs face lit up.
“Our garden is big,” she said. “I actually know a good place where we could go, a little bit further away from them.”
She scornfully nodded her head over to the women who were currently struggling to chase away some obtrusive blackbirds, who had come flying and were now picking at the hems of the delicate linen.
There was a certain twinkle in Sarahʼs eyes, showing her determination to pull Henryʼs idea of ʻoutdoor lessonsʼ through. She most definitely didnʼt appear as if she was in the mood to return to her room and to quit class altogether that day.
“Why not?” Henry said happily in response to her suggestion. From his afternoon strolls, he knew that the garden was huge and offered several nice spots where they would be able to sit and learn without being disturbed by anyone. He was thrilled at the thought that Sarah might know a slightly more secluded place, maybe somewhere in the back recessions of the garden, where they could continue having fun and even flirt a little bit.
Just that they didnʼt stay in the garden.
When Henry followed Sarah, he noticed to his puzzlement that she walked all the way around the mansion and towards one of the gates which led out of the garden. There he spotted a narrow pathway that disappeared deep into the forest.
Henry hesitated.
“Miss Sarah, I am not sure if this is such a good idea...” he mumbled, torn between his duty as a teacher, which would have meant to interfere and hold Sarah back, and his urge to give in to the sweet temptation of following her into the solitary woods.
“Why? Are you afraid of the forest?” Sarah sniggered.
“Of course not,” Henry gave back. “It is just...”
“What?” Sarahʼs chuckling ebbed and she looked a little sad.
For a moment, Henry pensively stared at the girl who had already opened the gate and was in the process of stepping outside. She was looking at him expectantly, her eyes sparkling with hope.
And with a quick, slightly nervous backward glance, he walked after her and through the gate.
They didnʼt get very far, though.
“Mr. Abbott!? Sarah!?” Henry suddenly heard Lady Partridgeʼs shrill voice behind him, which made him startle.
Damn it... he thought angrily.
“Where are you going?” the lady asked, appearing puzzled.
“It is alright,” Sarah called over to her, entirely unmoved by the lie which was to follow. “Mr. Abbott decided to transfer Biology lessons into the open today. He wants to show me some plants and trees. We can barely do that in the classroom, can we?”
Henry had no recollection whatsoever of having announced that he would hold Biology lessons with Sarah; especially not in the open. Still, he saw no alternative than to play along with her. Reassuringly, he nodded over to Lady Partridge, who asked in wonder, “Do you not have sketches of them in your books?”
“Yes, but it is not the same,” Sarah replied before turning to Henry again. “Isnʼt that right, Mr. Abbott?”
“Oh, right, yes, it is not the same, no…” Henry stammered nervously.
Lady Partridgeʼs glance fell on the school books in his hands, and Henry guessed that the poor fooled woman came to the conclusion that she was about to intrude on some modern ways of teaching which she didnʼt understand and better not questioned.
“Well, right then... Do not go too far, though,” she finally mumbled, turned around and rushed back to the laundry chaos, which was in the process of getting completely out of control judging by the hysterical screams which could be heard coming from the front yard.
Do not go too far.
Henry feared that he could not guarantee for that once he was entirely alone with Sarah.
* * *
As soon as they set foot on forest ground, Sarah noticeably livened up. Her eyes were sparkling and her face acquired a healthy color again. There was even a little smile playing over her lips.
Pleasant coolness surrounded them the deeper they ventured into the woods. The tall trees stood so close together that only a few glimpses of sunlight managed to penetrate the thick foliage of the treetops. It was exceptionally quiet except for the twitter of a few birds and the sound of Henryʼs and Sarahʼs footsteps on the ground as they were treading on little twigs and leaves.
“Would you like me to tell you where I got the flower from that fell out of my book the other day?” Sarah asked after having quietly walked next to Henry for a while, her books pressed to her chest as if she wanted to protect herself. Henry could sense that despite her obvious joy about their little excursion, the fact that she was all alone with him in the forest made her shy and insecure.
“If you feel like telling me,” Henry replied, happy that she wanted to let him in on some secrets of hers, as he took this as a sign of her growing trust in him.
“I do feel like telling you,” Sarah answered. She plucked a berry from a raspberry bush and stuck it into her mouth.
“I got it from my mother,” she added, chewing away on the berry. “My father sent it to her from Austria. Priscilla, I mean, Lady Partridge, is not my real mother, you know? She is just my aunt. And Horatio is my uncle.”
“Oh, are they?” Henry tried his best to sound as if this piece of information was entirely new to him. Deep inside, though, he felt like a liar as he pretended to be entirely ignorant. After all, Oscar had already told him everything. But he knew he would feel equally like a liar towards Oscar if he broke his promise to keep quiet about the conversation which they had had on the train. Hoping that Sarah would not expect him to comment on her words in any way, he preferred not to comment on them at all.
“Would you like to see where my real mother is?” Sarah asked, saving him from his misery.
Henry nodded quietly.
To his surprise, Sarah suddenly took a sharp left turn and led him even deeper into the forest. He wondered if they would ever find their way back home again. All the trees had begun to look the same to him, and the path they had initially walked on was entirely covered by vegetation in this part of the forest and was by now far from being recognizable.
After about five minutes, they arrived at a small fenced-in site. Upon coming closer, Henry noticed to his surprise that it was a little graveyard which appeared rather neglected, overgrown with wildflowers and shrubs as it was.
Sarah placed her books on the ground next to the entrance, opened the rusty, creaking gate which led inside the cemetery, and slipped through it. Henry followed her as she was crossing the yard until they reached the far end of it. There, unobtrusively nestled in the corner, was a very small grave with a withered wooden cross in which somebody had carved the name ʼMelissa Farringworthʼ in simple, scrawled letters. Judging by its size, Henry gathered that the grave carried an urn.
“Is she the woman that I saw on one of your drawings?” Henry asked carefully.
Sarah nodded quietly. Then she bent down to remove some leaves which had fallen down on the grave and some moss which had started to grow all around it. Henry noticed that Melissa Farringworthʼs grave was the only one which appeared somewhat looked after amidst the wilderness around it, and he guessed that this was due to Sarahʼs intensive care alone as he could not imagine that anybody else ever ventured to this place. All the other graves seemed to belong to people who had died more than a century ago, with no surviving relatives left to remember them.
“I am sorry that she is dead,” Henry said.
“This is a very old graveyard, you know,” Sarah explained matter-of-factly, ignoring his words of sympathy. “It has not been used for ages, because the official one for the villagers is in Oxford town. But Aunt Priscilla and Uncle Horatio did not like my mother very much and found that this place would be as good as anything; after all, the council does not charge any fees for it. But I am actually quite glad that my mother is here because it is so close to home. So I can come and visit her every day. As for my real father, I do not know where he is. After my mother died and I moved to the mansion, he stopped writing to me. Or maybe Uncle Horatio threw his letters away, I do not know…”
“Are you implying that you come here on a regular basis?” Henry asked when Sarah had finished cleaning the grave and wiped the soil off of her hands with a handkerchief.
“Of course,” she replied, casting him an uncomprehending look.
“I mean, do you not think it is a little bit dangerous for a young girl like you to be all alone in the forest?”
“Only when Uncle Horatio and his hunting mates are around. They tend to shoot at anything that moves,” Sarah scoffed.
She picked her books up from the ground, then they slipped back through the entrance gate and left the cemetery.
“Apart from that, this forest is a safe and peaceful place,” Sarah added. “I have never felt in danger here. The animals do not cause me any harm because they know that I love and respect them.”
Henry frowned at what he found was a pretty unhealthy level of naïvety. After all, animals were not necessarily the only predators which could be found in dark forests. And not all animals cared if a human being loved them.
Suddenly, something rustled in the undergrowth.
“Shh...” Sarah indicated Henry to be quiet and not to move. She pointed her finger over to the thicket in the distance, but Henry couldnʼt see anything. All he noticed was that his heart was beating faster when Sarah placed her hand on his arm and inched closer to him. Her hair brushed his shoulder. He found this sensation electrifying.
“They are more afraid of us, you see?” she whispered next to his ear. Then he saw it: a young roe deer. It didnʼt seem to notice that Henry and Sarah were secretly observing it as it was happily munching away at some leaves of a tree.
After a little while, it slowly walked away.
To Henryʼs disappointment, Sarahʼs hand let go of his arm again.
“When I see that my uncle aims at one of them, I let out a loud yell. Then they get scared and run away,” Sarah explained as they continued their walk through the forest. All of a sudden, she stretched out her arms and closed her eyes, a wide and carefree smile spreading across her face. She deeply inhaled the cool air, then she opened her eyes again, hopped onto a nearby tree trunk which had fallen down and lay horizontally on the ground, and began to balance on it.
She appeared so gleeful and carefree that it seemed to Henry that the whole world was nothing but a playground for her, as long as that world lay beyond the walls of Partridge Mansion.
He was walking next to her, ready to catch her in case she fell, and could hardly believe his luck when it actually happened: she began to sway, then stumbled, and finally fell—straight into his arms.
Utter surprise and secret fascination lay in her eyes as she was clinging to his shoulders. Henry noticed how incredibly light she felt in his embrace and how her sweet scent filled his nose and dazzled his brain.
For a moment, they were just staring at each other, both puzzled by the unexpected body contact. Sarahʼs face was frighteningly close to his, her lips slightly parted, her eyes fixed on his mouth.
I could kiss her now... Henry thought, his heart hammering with an almost unbearable force in his chest. But even though the occasion was incredibly unique, he didnʼt dare as Sarah was suddenly falling right back into her shyness again.
“I really should not dash about like that, should I?” she laughed nervously and blushed. “You must really teach me some manners, Mr. Abbott.”
Reluctantly, Henry let go of her. Her hands slowly slipped off his shoulders as she tried to regain her posture.
Henry was unable to speak. He was still dazed by the fact that her body had been so close to his and how nice it had felt to hold her in his arms.
“Come, let us go to my favorite place now,” Sarah said merrily. “I must learn something, or else I will be as daft as a piece of toast.”
And as if he was under the influence of an unbreakable spell, Henry followed her like a stupid sheep in the herd.
* * *
It seemed to Henry that Sarah knew the forest by heart. While he had long ago lost his bearings, she was dancing through the woods like a fairy queen, humming a little tune, and every now and then turning around to see if Henry was following her. And when she saw that he still was there, she cast him such a sweet and charming smile that it made his head spin and his heart jump excitedly in his chest.
Eventually, they reached a clearing.
“We are almost there,” Sarah said and stepped out of the dark forest and into the sun.
The next moment, Henry found himself on a large meadow, overgrown with marguerites, yarrow, and purple lilies. It was quiet and peaceful here, and a gentle breeze cooled the otherwise sizzling air. The far end of the meadow was marked by the shores of a small lake, lined by reed and willow trees.
Sarah bent to pick some flowers., and as she did so, she was surrounded by swarms of bees and butterflies who were busy with their love play. Then she walked over to the waterʼs edge, her gaze lost in the distance. The slight wind got hold of her hair and played with her chestnut curls.
Like a painting... Henry thought mesmerized as he was quietly watching her. He sat down in the shade of one of the willow trees, unable to turn his eyes away from Sarah.
Just as if she had sensed Henryʼs gaze on her, she turned her head to look at him, and when she saw him sitting under the tree, she walked over to him and sat down on the grass next to him, carefully placing the flowers, which she had picked, on the ground.
“Do you like it here?” she asked.
“I find it absolutely magnificent,” Henry whispered.
“It is my favorite place,” Sarah added. Then she took her history book and flicked the page open where they had stopped reading before they had left the classroom.
Henry suddenly felt overwhelmed with a feeling of immense contentedness. Completely at ease with himself and the whole world around him, he made himself comfortable by lying back on the grass while listening to Sarah as she continued citing the names of the kings.
“Henry IIIʼs successor to the throne were Henry I, Henry II and Henry III. And then there was King Paul.”
Suddenly, she stopped.
“You are sleeping and not paying attention at all,” Henry heard her say, a slightly reproachful tone to her voice.
“I am paying attention...” he mumbled drowsily.
“If you were, why didnʼt you correct me then when I said that Henryʼs successor was King Paul when it was in fact Richard II?”
Henry blinked at her with one eye. He wanted to see her face when she blushed; and he was certain she would turn red in response to his words which were about to follow.
“I did not want to interrupt you as I like the sound of your voice so much,” he said softly.
Blushing.
“And I adore the way you blush...”
More blushing.
Henry couldnʼt suppress a grin because of his little teasing game. After all, she had teased him, too. He could have said even more things to her which would have made her blush so much that her face would have never gone back to its normal complexion again. But he didnʼt want to scare her, as he had by now learned that what lay hidden behind Sarahʼs wild and cheeky nature was indeed a highly sensitive and shy girl that played with fire without knowing how to handle that fire once it was kindled.
“Henry IV, Henry V, Henry VI,” Sarah continued nervously, desperately trying to keep her calm. Henry sensed that his blunt remarks had deeply unsettled her.
Then, all of a sudden, she stopped citing again, closed her book and put it aside. Knowing that she was quite impulsive, Henry momentarily worried that he might have unsettled her a little bit too much and that she would get up and leave.
But she did not leave. To Henryʼs utter surprise she lay down next to him instead and began to watch the clouds which were passing above their heads.
“Have you ever noticed that no cloud ever looks like the other?” she whispered.
“Hmm...” Henry mumbled in agreement, trying to control his breathing. He was on the verge of hyperventilating with excitement because of Sarah lying so close to him, their arms and hands only inches apart from each other.
“That one up there... it looks like one of Thelmaʼs apple pies, donʼt you think?” Sarah pointed her finger at a little fluffy cloud in the sky.
“Very much so,” Henry replied.
A wasp was circling around Sarahʼs head. Sarah watched it for a while, but when the wasp threatened to come closer to her face, she raised her hand—the one that had been lying so close to Henryʼs—and tried to chase the insect away.
Henry reacted quickly. While Sarah was busy defending her face from a wasp attack, Henry secretly moved his hand and positioned it at the exact spot where Sarahʼs hand had lain before, hoping that his sly plan would work out.
It did, because when Sarah let her hand fall back onto the ground, it landed right on his hand.
“Oh, I am sorry...!” Startled, she quickly let her hand slip down from his.
But not entirely.
Their little fingers were still touching. Henry was sure this was no coincidence.
“It is alright,” he said, trying to sound casual. He instinctively knew that this was the moment he had been waiting for. He also knew that if he didnʼt react now, he would never be granted a similar chance.
And so he waited a short while until Sarah had calmed down again, then he ever so gently let his little finger slide over her little finger. He was worried she might back away, but she didnʼt move, and not a single sound was coming from her mouth. He noticed, however, that her breathing had become quite shallow.
He slowly turned his head to face her. She appeared shaken and didnʼt dare to look at him. Still, she didnʼt back away.
Carefully, he let his other fingers slide over hers. And then, after yet another while, he covered her whole hand with his.
At first, there was no reaction from her side. But then, after only a few seconds, her fingers slowly and hesitantly curled around his thumb.
Henry wanted to scream out loud. He could not believe that all of this was really happening to him.
It must be a dream, he thought. Just a wonderful dream…
But when after a couple of minutes he felt how Sarah suddenly nestled her head on his shoulder, he realized that he was not dreaming at all.
Good Lord… he thought excitedly.
For a fleeting moment, Henry found that this was more than he was able to handle right now. Despite the fact that he had been the one to push all of this forward in order to finally make Sarah open up, he suddenly saw himself completely overwhelmed with fear because of her unexpected, straightforward manner. He got scared because of the effect she had on him. He got scared because his feelings for her made him weak and depending. She took away all of his strength, all of his control—a new sensation which he first had to get used to. He had never felt like that in the presence of a woman, had never felt entirely at a womanʼs mercy.
He wasnʼt granted much time to recover from his emotional turmoil, because suddenly Sarahʼs whisper broke the silence.
“Last night, Oscar told me that you are in love with me.”
Henryʼs heart missed a beat. A pleasant heat began to spread in his stomach. His ears got hot. His toes tingled.
“Did he?” he croaked, swearing to himself that the next time he met Oscar, he would strangle that little would-be Cupid for letting out all of Henryʼs secrets after having promised complete discretion.
Sarah remained silent for a moment. Then she whispered, “I am in love with you, too.”
Sarahʼs highly unexpected confession made Henryʼs heart hammer so strongly in his chest that he feared his whole body would burst. She slowly raised her head, her chin still resting on his shoulder. Then she looked at him longingly, as if she was in terrible need to hear what he had to say in reply to her declaration of love. She wanted to hear if Oscar had told her the truth.
Henry knew he needed to respond, but he was unable to. His mouth was terribly dry and his brain refused to come up with anything but gibberish. But as he needed to react in some way, he did the only thing that came to his mind, something that he had been desperate to do ever since Sarah had come to see him in the library at night, something that would be worth so much more than plain words, something that would give her the assurance she desired to have.
He raised his hand to touch the girlʼs face, his fingers gingerly stroking her cheek and exploring the feel of her soft skin. Then he carefully lifted her chin and bent to kiss her.
There was a glow in her eyes which he had never seen before. Her breathing accelerated, just as his, and her body trembled, just as his. She craned her neck, closed her eyes, and then, finally, their lips touched.
Henry noticed that her lips were lush and sweet like the pieces of peach which he got served up as a dessert every day. Only that the taste of the peaches was nothing compared to Sarahʼs sensual kiss. He sensed her inexperience, her insecurity, and found this sensation extremely exciting. He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her closer to his body and kissed her, again and again, until she began to melt in his aura of warmth and passion, and until he believed to go insane.
“I am supposed to bring you to your senses,” he croaked breathlessly in between kissing. “But instead, it is you making me senseless...”
“What you do to me is much worse than that... I am just dying...” Sarah whimpered.
Henry smiled at her.
“You will not die,” he whispered softly. “I will gladly save you from all the bad things in the world if you let me...”
Sarah cast him a puzzled look as she was reflecting on the deeper meaning of his words which had sounded a little like a wedding vow.
Henry was puzzled himself. Two days ago, he was convinced he would leave Partridge Mansion and never return. But this option was, of course, completely out of the question now. Happily, he embraced Sarah and held her tight, his hands gently sliding up and down her back, while the girl went in eager search of his mouth again. Her lips locked with his, and he felt her incredible hunger for love and affection while she was taking her unfulfilled desire out on him. Every now and then, Henry felt that he had to keep Sarahʼs and his own passion a little in check before they threatened to do any foolish things which they could possibly regret later on. But they managed to not entirely lose their minds, although Henry secretly wished they wouldnʼt have to restrain themselves for so many reasons, one of which being Damian Cox.
Still, Henry burst with happiness, and looking at Sarah he realized that she felt the same because an angelic, blissful smile was playing over her lips. He had not really deemed her capable of a smile like that, especially not on the day when he had met her for the first time. Thinking back to that moment, he realized that what he had seen then had not been the real Sarah at all but a distorted version of hers, the result of a life lived in unhappiness and despair.
But now it seemed that she had opened up her heart.
He had opened up her heart.
Time went by at speed of light, though. When, much later, Henry threw a glance at his pocket watch, he noticed that it was already half past eleven.
“I am afraid we have to go,” he whispered into Sarahʼs ear. For the past hour, she had been lying in his arms, dozing happily, her head nestled at the hollow of his neck.
“I do not want to go…” The despair and longing in her eyes almost broke Henryʼs heart.
“We will be together again tomorrow,” he said softly, stroking her head with his hands, trying in vain to readjust her messy hair.
“We will be together, but not like this…”
Henry kissed her again, pulled her close to his body and embraced her.
“I swear I will always be near you in one way or the other...” He smiled at her reassuringly even though he had not the slightest idea how to fulfill his promise.
Hesitantly, Sarah let go of him, got up and removed some grass and flower petals from her dress. Then Henry took her by the hand, and when they slowly made their way back home, he suddenly found that Oscarʼs decision to play Cupid had not been too bad after all.
All too soon, they reached the edge of the forest, and when the mansion came in sight, ominously towering in front of them, Henry saw himself immediately overcome with revulsion. He had never been able to better comprehend Sarahʼs urge to rebel in the face of this massive epitome of pressure and gloom than now that he had spent a couple of carefree and cheerful hours with her in the solitude of the woods.
But there was also the sensation of worry; worry that it indeed might have been too daring to leave the mansion grounds. After all, they had been gone all morning. Not that he regretted the little excursion in any way, but he wondered if it would bring certain consequences if Lord Partridge heard about their ʻBiology lessons in the open;ʼ and Henry was certain that Lady Partridge would inform her husband about it.
“Sarah,” he mumbled thoughtfully, “would you do me a favor?”
“Anything you want…” Sarah breathed and was just about to cling to him and kiss him again, but he took her hand and led her over to a tree trunk where they both sat down.
“I want you to listen carefully to what I am going to tell you now, and then I want you to learn the things that I am going to tell you by heart,” Henry said, insistently. “All of this will be much more important than the names of the kings. Do you understand me?”
Sarah nodded eagerly.
“I do.”
“Good.” Henry let out a sigh of relief. Then he began to hold a short Biology lecture while Sarah attentively listened to what he had to say, trying to memorize every word.
“Do you think you will be able to remember this later on?” Henry asked uncertainly after a little while.
But when Sarah eagerly nodded again, he felt safe enough to finally return with her to the mansion, praying to God that everything would work out the way he hoped it would.
* * *
They entered the mansion as tutor and student, displaying a decent distance between them. They parted with the politeness appropriate for two people who know each other only from sharing a couple of hours of lessons every day. And they both spent the afternoon going after their tasks like two people who are so occupied with other things that they almost forget that the other one exists.
In their hearts, though, they were like two people who feel as if they have known each other all their lives and as if the world has no meaning to them anymore unless they can be together; two people whose minds are filled with fantasies about exploring the loved oneʼs body and mind, and who are thirsty for the next possible occasion where they can be together.
During dinner, Henry forced himself not to look at anyone, as he was sure that the glow in his eyes would give away all his feelings for Sarah. The latter was blankly staring at the plate in front of her, occasionally risking a shy and quick glance at Henry. But he didnʼt dare to look back at her.
Sitting at the table with the Partridges now, it occurred to him that by being in love with Sarah he was playing with fire. Not only did he risk her welfare, he also risked being dismissed—and hence put their few moments of togetherness entirely at stake. He knew they had to be careful, no matter how much in love they were; or else, all would be lost and he would never be able to see Sarah again.
Lord Partridge was struggling with a chicken leg. The meat was as tough as a piece of leather as Thelma had overdone it a little bit. Henry guessed that because of all the stress with the laundry, she had forgotten to pull the chicken out of the oven in time. He didnʼt care, as he wasnʼt hungry anyway. He was far too nervous and excited to eat something and constantly caught himself thinking back to the hours he had spent with Sarah in the forest, thinking back to the moment of her sweet confession.
I am in love with you, too...
“It has come to my attention, Mr. Abbott, that you did an experiment today: holding class in the open.” Lord Partridgeʼs voice tore him out of his stupor.
“Indeed, Lord Partridge,” Henry answered politely. “It was very warm in the classroom, and Miss Sarah did not feel very well due to this. And, to be quite frank, neither did I. So we decided to go outside.”
“And for what reason did you not stay in the garden?”
Lord Partridge cast Henry a slightly suspicious glance.
“Well, as I found that it would be good if Miss Sarah got some physical exercise, I ultimately decided to combine the latter with Biology lessons. This form of education was a common practice at elementary school in London where I taught before,” Henry lied.
“You went to the forest in London?” Lord Partridge asked in a doubtful tone. “As far as I know, there is not a single forest in London for miles around.”
“We went to the park, of course,” Henry answered, hoping that Lord Partridge would eventually stop with his interrogation as Henry gradually began to run out of plausible arguments. He pondered if he should also mention that it would have been impossible to learn in the garden with the laundry riot going on and Lady Partridge shouting like a sergeant major. But of course he didnʼt say a word.
“Well, it is an interesting approach. I told you before that I am not entirely against reforms, as long as they are within reason,” Lord Partridge said, still sounding slightly sceptical. “And what exactly did you teach her?”
Henry threw a quick and secretive glance at Sarah.
Hadnʼt he known all along that this would be coming?
Sarah understood the message which he sent her with his eyes and knew that it was her turn now to speak.
“Mr. Abbott explained to me how photosynthesis works,” she said.
Henry remembered that it had indeed taken her ages until she had been able to pronounce the word ʻphotosynthesisʼ correctly and wondered if she had secretly written it down on the palm of her hand so that she wouldnʼt forget.
“Is that so?” Lord Partridge asked, curiously looking up from his plate. “And can you explain to me how it works then?”
Donʼt let me down, Sarah...
“Well...” Sarah began a little pompously, “just like us, plants and trees need something to eat, but they can not go and get their food like animals or human beings because they do not have feet.”
“Obviously,” Lord Partridge remarked, not appearing very impressed at this stage.
“But nature has equipped them with special leaves which have pigments called chor… cholera...”
Sarah looked helplessly at Henry, who promptly reacted and secretly mouthed the word in order to help her.
“Chlorophyll!” Sarah continued. “And these leaves have tiny slits at the bottom through which they suck up air. And then the pigments with the terrible name extract carbon dioxide out of the sucked-up air with the help of sunlight. After that, the carbon dioxide gets together with the water that is in the tree, and then they both create an energy called glucose. And that is what the plants and trees eat. Of course, this is just a highly simplified model. In reality it is far more complex.”
Henry could not refrain from smiling a little to himself. He found that Sarah had done very well although her lecture had sounded pretty much cited from the heart—which it had been after all. Still, it seemed to have the desired effect.
Lord Partridge appeared slightly dazzled. He took a sip of his wine and remained silent for a moment. Despite the unmoved expression on his face, Henry could sense that the lord was impressed. Still, it would not have been typical for Lord Partridge to say anything to acknowledge what he had just heard. But Henry didnʼt care. This wasnʼt about acknowledgement. This was about pretending that they had spent the morning doing serious studying instead of doing other things which they shouldnʼt have done.
“And you needed four hours to teach her that, Mr. Abbott?” Lord Partridge finally asked.
Henry didnʼt fail to notice the sarcasm in the lordʼs voice. But he had seen this coming, too. He realized that he was a really quick learner. It had only taken him a few days to get a feel for the distorted minds of the Partridges and to find out how to react accordingly to their nagging questions.
“Well, we also looked at various types of plants and trees, which might be useful to know,” he explained. “And apart from that, we also tried to improve Miss Sarahʼs knowledge on British history by talking about former monarchs.”
“I do not consider all of this as particularly important in terms of Sarahʼs introduction into high society,” Lord Partridge said matter-of-factly. “Nobody there will be really amazed by the news that plants and trees do not have feet.”
“I thought it would be good to broaden Miss Sarahʼs horizon in general. I generally share the view that it helps to know which monarchs reigned our country in past centuries and in which way they contributed to the state that our nation is currently finding itself in. After all, we learn from the past and hence can create a better future by avoiding mistakes that our predecessors might have made.”
As Lord Partridge did not comment on this, Henry guessed that the lord had run out of things to say to refute Henryʼs philosophy.
“I appreciate the effort you obviously put into Sarahʼs education,” Lord Partridge said after a while of contemplation. “I employed you exactly for that reason, because I could see from your letter of application that you are a man with a sense of duty. Still, I would prefer it if you stayed on our premises during lessons. I do not consider it safe for my daughter to wander around in that forest—not even in company.”
“Certainly, Lord Partridge,” Henry replied obediently although it frustrated him to see his chances dwindle to be with Sarah outside the classroom ever again. But he was well aware that it was better to bow to the wishes of Lord Partridge, who so obviously didnʼt have the faintest idea that Sarah secretly spent more time alone in the forest than at home.
From the corner of his eyes, Henry could see that Sarah was far from bowing, though. There was that dangerous twinkle in her eyes which Henry knew all too well by now; a twinkle that announced a major outburst.
“Is it because we might get inadvertently shot by you or your hunting mates?” she snapped before Henry had a chance to stop her from conjuring up a row.
Lord Partridge pulled his typical impassive, stony face which was a sure sign that he was angry.
Henry realized that he needed to interfere.
“Sarah... shh,” he said softly, throwing the girl a placatory glance.
Sarah pouted but immediately lowered her gaze.
“I am sorry,” she whispered, sheepishly staring onto her plate where bits of untouched carrot were piling.
Lord Partridge stared at her in utter surprise, as did Lady Partridge. Henry noticed that even the butler and the chambermaid looked at each other, perplexed.
Lord Partridge cleared his throat.
“Mr. Abbott, I wonder what your secret is to silence that girlʼs loose tongue—something that my wife and I have been trying to achieve for more than a decade now; in vain I must say,” he said, seemingly more impressed by Sarahʼs unexpected obedience than by her little lecture on photosynthesis. “Someday you must tell me your tactics.”
All it takes is a little love... Henry thought.
And with exactly that love in her eyes, Sarah looked at him when they parted after dinner. They weren't granted a chance to share another moment alone, but the memories of the time they had spent together during that day and the anticipation of seeing each other again the next morning helped them stand through the parting and the long night to come.
* * *
Dear Diary,
I am so in love...