And now he was stuck—the muffins still had ten minutes and he’d have to cross through the living room to get to his bedroom anyway.
“Oh, you’re up.” Ben strolled into the kitchen, and Maddox turned around slowly, pasting a smile on his face. Things don’t have to be weird—not if you don’t let them be. “Kitchen smells amazing. Blueberries?”
“Yeah.” Maddox nodded. There really were few scents as wonderful as lemon-blueberry muffins, but Ben’s woodsy out-on-the-town cologne was competing for a close second. The kitchen was too damn tiny for both of them anymore. “Making muffins and stuff to take to Apollo’s for breakfast tomorrow. My goal is an empty fridge by tomorrow night.”
“You think we’ll go wheels up Monday morning? That’s what my gut says, at least.” Figuring out when they might get the call to deploy was one of Ben’s favorite hobbies.
“Probably.” Maddox didn’t need to speculate—he kept his head down and stayed ready regardless.
Ben grabbed two beers out of the fridge—they still had a six-pack of Stone IPA from their last trip up to Oceanside to see Ben’s family. That had been a nice day—good ale in the brewery’s garden, listening to Ben and his father talk the Galaxy’s chances in this year’s MLS season. Ben set the beers on the white counter that Maddox had just scrubbed, then fished out a third and offered it to him.
“Not now, thanks.” Maddox held up his soapy hands.
“Sure.” Ben didn’t put the beer back in the fridge, though, setting it next to the other two. “You want to come hang out? You’d like this guy. Very chatty.”
“Muffins have another few minutes,” Maddox hedged.
“You can hear the timer in the living room,” Ben pressed. “Pretty sure this guy would be up for getting to know you too. He seems the type up for whatever.”
Whatever was exactly what Maddox was not up for, and even Ben’s wink wasn’t enough to undo his resolve. He shook his head and set the now-spotless mixer bowl back on the stand. Ben let out a sigh and leaned against the counter. The kitchen really was too small for two guys over six feet, and it was definitely too small for Ben’s coaxing grin.
“Come on. You need some fun.” Ben ran a hand through his military-short brown hair. He didn’t really have to advertise that he was a SEAL to get laid—the massive biceps bulging out of the tight T-shirt and muscular legs in black jeans were incentive enough for most guys. And for the truly picky, his movie-star-next-door grin usually did the trick, but it wasn’t working on Maddox. Not tonight.
This was how he and Ben were so freaking different—Ben needed to fuck around and Maddox... Well, he needed to hunker down, pretend like he didn’t care, like he was nothing other than happy for him and excited about shipping out. “You go ahead.”
“I thought maybe...” Ben exhaled before giving him a searching look, one that made Maddox study the sink again, afraid of what Ben might see on his face. He wouldn’t change his mind. Not this night, not any night, not ever again. No more whatevers. “Okay. You’re welcome if you change your mind,” Ben said at last.
Was that disappointment in his voice? What would he see in Ben’s eyes? Maddox wasn’t sure what to hope for anymore, and he continued to study the sink as Ben left for the living room.
He took his time finishing the cleanup, trying to not listen in on the small talk coming from the other room...or get caught up in the long pauses in conversation that undoubtedly meant Ben’s talkative companion’s mouth was otherwise occupied. Maddox caught the timer right before it dinged and set the muffins on the cooling rack.
Nothing really left to do but walk out there. It would be okay. He’d smile, offer the muffins on the cooling rack, grab his tablet and headphones from the coffee table and head off to his room and crank the song he was trying to learn until he couldn’t hear...whatever. But when he got out to the living room it was empty.
A laugh that wasn’t Ben’s came from down the hall followed by a guttural sound that almost certainly was. Why did Maddox have to know that sound? Things would be so much easier if he didn’t. No one’s fault but yours.
Maddox snatched up the tablet and headphones, jamming the earpieces on right there, not waiting to get to his room. And if his heart gave a sad little flutter that Ben’s door was firmly shut, that whatever was off the table, exactly the way he’d wanted, well then that too was his own damn fault, and all he could do was hope that someday, somehow, things would be right between them again.
Don’t miss ON POINT by Annabeth Albert.
Available June 2017 wherever Carina Press ebooks are sold.
www.CarinaPress.com
Copyright ? 2017 by Annabeth Albert
Author’s Note
I’ve tried to stay as true to the SEAL program as I can for this series, and I’m so grateful to the wealth of resources out there—the people who have spoken with me, the websites and message boards, and the biographies and firsthand accounts. However, I’m sure certain liberties have been taken, and any lapses are my own. I also appreciate those who spoke to me about their Greek heritage and helped me to round out Apollo’s background.
Acknowledgments
Edie Danford believed in this pairing from the very start, and her tireless cheerleading kept me going. My other beta readers, Wendy and Kristy, offered valuable feedback and made this book better with their insights. As always, my editor, Deb Nemeth, pushed me to strengthen the book and helped me bring Apollo to a place I’m truly proud of. The entire team at Carina is amazing, and I’m particularly grateful for the amazing covers for this series. I wrote this book over the course of a long summer, and I’m so blessed by my family’s understanding and support. Also, thank you to my Facebook reader group, Annabeth’s Angels, for your support. You all enrich my writing life so much. Finally, I appreciate all my readers, reviewers and fans. I’m so privileged to share my stories with you.