I knew my eyes were wild when he caught them with his. His lips were pursed and he wouldn’t answer. He tried to take my hands, but I pulled them away.
“Is there more here?” I asked.
“No.” His voice was hard.
I drew in a ragged breath, wishing this vile agitation would leave me.
“Let’s just keep cleaning,” I said absently. I reached for a folded piece of paper in the center of the coffee table. Kaidan grabbed it from my fingers and shoved it in his pocket, mumbling a rough curse. I stared at his mouth, astonished.
“You said the f-word.”
That definitely shouldn’t have been the thing to relieve me of my annoyance, but it did.
“Sorry. I just . . . I didn’t mean for it to be like this.”
I wondered what the paper was, and why he didn’t want me to see it, but those questions were pushed aside by other instincts. The blood under my skin buzzed with thoughts of drugs and parties and dirty words on Kaidan’s lips. A molten brazenness roared up inside me as we faced each other on our knees. Kai caught my eye and held it, dark clouds brewing in his own.
“Careful how you look at me right now,” he warned. “I’ve been on edge since your little striptease today.”
“Yeah,” I murmured. “About that . . .”
Catching my bottom lip in my teeth, I ran a hand over his shoulder, down to the bare skin of his forearm. His chest rose and fell faster. Our eyes connected, crashing.
He took my hand and lifted it between us, singling out the finger that had been coated in powder. He rubbed the pad of his thumb over my fingertip.
“The way this made you feel?” he said. “That is what you do to me.” He dropped my hand and gripped my waist.
I inched closer. I wanted to kiss him, but this would be no tame kiss. A low sound rumbled in the back of his throat and his fingers tightened on my sides. I shouldn’t push him when we were both like this, but I wanted to. He’d once told me I was playing with fire. I felt the tip of the flame now, the threat of being singed. I wanted to give in to that temptation and make him lose control. Mentally, I smacked myself, and the angel and demon girls within me brawled. Kicking. Screaming. Teeth and nails.
The angel came out on top, panting and weary, because now, more than ever, we couldn’t afford to be burned. Ugh! My darker side seared with regret as the decision was made.
I broke away from him, moving a few feet backward and crouching. His eyes stayed locked with mine. We needed more space to get our heads under control, because I could see he was about to crawl right after me. I jumped to my feet, blood still pumping hot in my veins.
“Where are your keys?” I asked, breaths coming fast. We’d passed a grocery store down the street. “I’ll go get food and cleaning stuff.”
Still eyeing me, he fished out his keys and a few bills. Our hands touched when I took them and I heard his sharp intake of air. I stood, running nervous fingers through my hair.
“I’ll be back soon.”
When I returned he seemed calmer and cleaner. He’d showered and changed.
Large garbage bags and antiseptic wipes made cleaning the living room and kitchen much faster. When it was time to look at the bathrooms and bedroom, I braced myself, but they weren’t as bad as I expected. The bedroom had clothes everywhere, and his sheets were hanging half on the floor. I made quick work of the bathrooms, while Kaidan stripped the sheets and shoved them into the washing machine.
“Er . . . Anna?” he called from the hall. I found him staring at the dials. I’d already decided that I was not going to do everything for him. The boy had stacks of dirty clothes in his room because he chose to buy new ones instead of washing them. I showed him, pointing and explaining, then watched as he did it himself. My heart bloomed every time he wore that cute grin of accomplishment.
I showered after that, grimy from the day’s events, which already felt far in the past. His bathroom smelled of yummy boy products, and I smiled to myself, still disbelieving I was really there with him, no matter how unromantic the circumstances.
I headed back to the kitchen to make meals. I wanted to fill his freezer. Every burner on the stove was boiling, sautéing, or searing something and the counters were filled with ingredients. I stood there, staring at it all with my hands on my hips, working out the exact timing in my mind. And then the air thickened around me.
My eyes hesitantly went to the doorway where Kaidan stood, taking up way too much space and oxygen. As he loomed there, his eyes became rolling clouds and his red badge expanded.