September Moon (Alexa O'Brien, Huntress #8)

“Nothing for me tonight.” Dayne sat heavily in the seat across from Shaz and me. His hard, rugged face made it difficult to gauge his mood. “I want to thank you for taking care of Stuart. Owen told me what happened with the vampires. He said you’re a strong fighter and a true wolf despite your hybrid status. His opinion means a lot to me. If he thinks you’re a worthy ally, then so do I.”


He offered me a meaty paw of a hand, and I accepted it gratefully. My alliance! I was so excited I could have squealed. Amid so much chaos and uncertainty, it felt damn good to have something go my way.

“Thank you, Dayne. I’m sorry Owen had to be there for that. It was unexpected, and I’m glad he wasn’t seriously hurt.” Or worse, I thought.

“Owen has had his share of ass kickings. He can take a beating from a few vampires.” Dayne laughed it off, making me think he didn’t realize how bad it had been that night.

“He saved my ass. I owe him for that. And I won’t forget it.” I meant every word. Owen was very much a stranger to me, but he’d backed me when he could have run. That meant a great deal to me.

Dayne stuck a cigar between his lips but didn’t light it. “I’d like to invite you both to run with us on the next full moon. It would be a good time to initiate Shaz into the pack.”

Oh crap. I cringed, and my face flushed red hot.

“Wait, what?” Shaz was understandably confused, seeing as I hadn’t mentioned it to him yet. He looked back and forth between Dayne and me, waiting for someone to explain.

“Um, I haven’t exactly told Shaz about that yet,” I said, feeling like a supreme ass. “I had wanted to clear it with you first.”

Dayne nodded slowly, sensing the shift in the atmosphere. He stood up and pulled a Zippo lighter from his pocket. “I see you two have some talking to do. We’ll be in touch. Have a good night.”

I watched him go, counting the seconds until he disappeared through the exit. Then I turned to Shaz, ready to plead for understanding.

“Let me explain, ok?” I slipped my hand into his and squeezed. “You need a pack, Shaz. You’re a strong wolf, but you’ve outgrown the Stony pack. Doghead is perfect for you. So I asked Dayne if he’d be willing to let you in.”

Shaz didn’t react for a minute. His hand was stiff within mine. My skin prickled at the sensation of his rising anger. “You set this up without even asking me if that’s what I wanted? Why would you do that, Lex? You hate it when Arys pulls crap like this on you.”

He had me there. Arys was famous for doing things he thought were in my best interest. I rarely felt the same way. “It was hypocritical. I know and I’m sorry. Is it really such a bad idea though?” If he could just recognize the opportunity for what it was, maybe he would see that I only wanted him to be happy.

He studied me intently, searching my eyes and leaving me to wonder what he was seeking. “What’s going on with you? Are you trying to get rid of me?”

Dammit. Shaz could always see right through me. There was no fooling him. “Not the way you think.” I held up a hand, pleading with him to hear me out when he swore and tried to stand up. “Shaz, please. Listen to me. I don’t want you giving up your life for me. You deserve more than I can offer.”

Running his hand through his hair, Shaz made a noise of disgust. “Are you kidding me? Haven’t we been through this? I made my choice, Lex. I committed myself to you.” He pulled away from me and leaned back in the booth as if he couldn’t possibly get far enough away. “You need me.”

“I do.” I nodded. “You’re my voice of reason, the one who keeps me from doing things I’ll regret. But that can’t be all you are, and you know it. Just think about it, about Doghead and how you can grow in a pack like that.”

Suspicion furrowed his brow. He looked torn, like he couldn’t decide if he should be mad or not. “I know why you’re doing this, Lex. You’re planning ahead, thinking about when you become a vampire. Do you think that’s a deal breaker for me?”

“It should be. I will go all dark, Shaz. Once I lose my light, I won’t be the same person. The blood bond will destroy the balance of light and dark between Arys and me. Everything will change for the worst.”

A look of absolute horror marred his handsome face. “How can you say that? Are you just giving up? That won’t change how I feel about you. I thought we agreed to take things one day at a time, to enjoy the time we have together without forcing it to be something it’s not.”

“We did. But what do you expect from me? Do you want me to watch you eventually grow old and die while refusing you the chance to live a full life?” My voice cracked, and I paused to gather myself. “I’m not sure you can do that with me. And I don’t want to be the one who takes it from you.”

Shaz’s wolf stared out at me. He felt like I was giving him the brush off, but it just wasn’t like that. At just twenty-four, Shaz had so much life left ahead of him. Letting him go was the last thing I wanted, but this wasn’t about what I wanted. It was about what he needed.